Kids and Health: Out of the mouth of babes...

Out of the mouth of babes...

By DEE - 26/07/2018 15:00

Today, while I was getting ready for the day, my 5-year-old daughter looked at me and said, "Mom, maybe you should do some gymnastics today. Your legs look bigger." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 777

You deserved it 479

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Same thing different taste

By me - 06/05/2013 00:56 - United States - Floresville

Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 562

You deserved it 6 965

By parentof5 - 23/04/2011 15:20 - United States

Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 643

You deserved it 24 788

Truthbomb

By antwhite1987 - 08/05/2016 17:30 - United States - Chicago

Today, my 5 year-old daughter saw me getting ready to sit down in a fold-out camp chair, and told me, with a big smile on her face, "Daddy, you're too fat to sit in that chair. You'll break it with your big butt." Out of the mouths of babes, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 392

You deserved it 1 438

By Lax - 12/01/2009 09:37 - France

Today, my 5 year-old daughter watched me getting dressed in the bathroom and asked, "Mum, when my boobs grow, will they droop like yours?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 934

You deserved it 3 500

By lyss - 16/11/2018 10:30 - United States - New Prague

Today, my 4-year-old daughter asked me when I was going to be skinny like her daycare lady. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 579

You deserved it 378

By Missyangel - 31/12/2009 07:39 - United States

Today, my 7 year-old looked at me and stated, "When I grow up Mommy I want to be fat just like you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 376

You deserved it 11 458

By madeyoulaugh - 25/11/2009 14:43 - United States

Today, I was watching my 7 year old daughter and her friend jump on our trampoline. I was really impressed by all the flips they were doing, and I told her "Hey! I can't even do that." To that her friend replied " Of course you can't. You're fat!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 991

You deserved it 8 185

Helpful

By Big bootay - 28/01/2019 16:00

Today, while at a restaurant, my 4 year-old son pointed at a lady and exclaimed, “Mom, her butt is even bigger than yours!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 225

You deserved it 360

Nice of her

By Bill - 06/12/2009 20:28 - United States

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year-old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 967

You deserved it 18 122

By Ashy104 - 09/01/2010 05:36 - United States

Today, I asked my mom if she thought I looked skinny in my shorts. She jiggled my leg fat, looked up at me and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 787

You deserved it 26 358

free_parking 3

Thursday 26 July 2018 17:38

take her the 5 year old's advice. get your flabs to the gym kids are honest. if they say you're fat, yore fat

Davros 12

Friday 27 July 2018 0:11

See how small the back of my hand looks far away? Now look at it close up (thwack)

Comments

wanted_2_want 40

Thursday 26 July 2018 15:21

Wouldn’t be awesome that if one needs to lose a couple of inches of fat could exercise for only day and ‘puff’?!!!

julfunky 29

Thursday 26 July 2018 16:51

Shouldn’t it be “poof” rather than “puff?”

wanted_2_want 40

Friday 27 July 2018 3:50

I think either can be used with this context. The idea would have same meaning.

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 26 July 2018 16:42

How rude! You ought to throw that kid in a vault and give her a pommeling!

free_parking 3

Thursday 26 July 2018 17:38

take her the 5 year old's advice. get your flabs to the gym kids are honest. if they say you're fat, yore fat

Cali 54

Friday 3 August 2018 19:38

Proofreading is never a bad idea, dude.

Davros 12

Friday 27 July 2018 0:11

See how small the back of my hand looks far away? Now look at it close up (thwack)

ojosRojos 28

Friday 27 July 2018 18:20

Ohhh kids. They can be brutal, but try not to take it to heart. I’m sure you’re beautiful!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I realized I’ve been saying “a whole nother” instead of “a whole other” my entire life. It wasn’t until my friend pointed it out with a smirk I’ve been speaking in an alternate universe. He was also the one to point out last year that my use of "like" every three words was "annoying and cringe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 424

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 784

You deserved it 22 711

The Top

Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 974

You deserved it 12 166

Today, I'm so out of shape that my arm ached after lifting chips out of a Lays bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 327

You deserved it 1 188

Today, at work, someone found a bat indoors. I offered my help. They shouted, "Let someone with the right expertise do it." I volunteer as a bat carer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 054

You deserved it 127

Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 343

You deserved it 2 236

Today, I got to work early to set up a prank for my coworker Cathy. I wrapped everything on her desk in aluminum foil, including individual paperclips. As I finished, my boss walked in, pointed at the desk, and said, "Great work, but that's John’s desk. He’s out sick today." FML

I agree, your life sucks 77

You deserved it 682

Today, I had to sell over $400 worth of china at a flea market. I barely got paid enough to refill my gas tank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 365

You deserved it 7 898