By Anonymous - 31/03/2022 16:00
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A few months of therapy might help you figure out the origin of your attraction to 'fat' men. Maybe enough introspection on your part might reveal the same thing, for free. If you understood this desire better, you might be able to come up with solutions. If it's related to their size, for example, it might turn out that you can be equally turned on by men who are more in shape, who are just of very large build. Or if it's related to being with someone who you feel it's degrading to be with, and you have just happened to have actualized that by focusing on 'fat' men, there is an entire world of healthy BDSM practices that cater to that fetish, which might sexually satisfy you, while you're with someone who you would be happy to have a romantic relationship with; or maybe with someone at a BDSM club, where it's sort of anonymous, and you're separating your sex life from the rest of your life. Those are just two examples; the point is, there's a pretty good chance that this attractions is a manifestation of something deeper, maybe more primitive, and if that's the case, you might be able to scratch that itch in a way you're more comfortable with. Or, as others have pointed out, you just might be a chubby chaser, in which case, spend some time looking for a well-groomed, well-dressed, intelligent, funny, caring man who is round and warm and cuddly, and see if you can feel some romance to go with your sexual urges.
Advice: if you're able, seek a therapist. No judgement at all, but having such strong negative feelings & reactions is not good for your mental health. When looking for a therapist, do your research just as when looking for a doctor. There's a few modalities. To name a few: -Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) -Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT) -Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT) -Emotion-Focused Therapy Remember that any therapist you find is working for *you*. You are allowed to ask for their qualifications, certifications, schooling, etc. You are allowed to tell them no. A very important question to ask them is if they *also* see a therapist. Any therapist that tells you they don't need their own therapist probably isn't a very good one. Wishing you the best 💜