Anxiety, Cars, Mugging and Health: Oh lawd, he comin'

Oh lawd, he comin'

By logkitty - 10/04/2012 04:35 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was sitting in my car outside my apartment complex when a man came around the corner holding something shiny, and I thought was a gun. Thinking I was about to get robbed at gunpoint, I bugged out and threw up. It was a silver watering can. He asked if I was okay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 603

You deserved it 12 859

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Same thing different taste

By parkinglotslayer - 11/06/2009 02:28 - United States

Today, my family and I were parking downtown when my sister yelled to watch out for a man approaching our car. I see him pull something from his pocket. I yell "It's a knife, don't roll down the window!" It was a pen, he was the parking attendant and the window was already rolled down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 009

You deserved it 47 759

Freakout

By ParanoidFreak - 31/12/2009 09:31 - United States

Today, after I got in my car in the Walmart parking lot, a creepy man knocked on my window. Since I'm incredibly paranoid and scare easily, I put my car in gear and tore out of there, accidentally hitting another car. Apparently he was returning my phone that I dropped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 946

You deserved it 40 271

By Anonymous - 25/11/2014 20:15 - United States

Today, as I walked into the bank, I tripped and bumped into a security guard. He thought I was assaulting him, so he pinned me to the floor and called for backup as he held me at gunpoint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 963

You deserved it 3 143

Many moving parts

By AlmostCarjacked - 17/07/2025 00:00 - United States - North Hollywood

Today, I was dogsitting at my friend's house and accidentally left my car door unlocked because I was running in to drop off my interview clothes. I came back outside to see a homeless man in my driver's seat, rummaging. I had to fight him. He was terrified. I couldn’t stop shaking for hours after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 344

You deserved it 135

Freaked out

By CriminalMistake - 04/05/2009 05:08 - United States

Today, I was leaving a campus parking garage. Suddenly, a huge man appeared behind me and kept saying "HEY!" "STOP!" In a gruff voice. I picked up my pace and so did he. I finally turned to him with a can of mace and threatened to use it. He was trying to return the $5 bill I dropped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 675

You deserved it 63 230

By anonymous - 20/12/2010 11:23

Today, while I was walking home from work, it started to rain. Clutching my bag in one hand, I started to run so I wouldn't get too wet. I saw a man running towards me and all of a sudden he tackled me to the ground. He thought I had stolen someone's handbag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 136

You deserved it 3 274

By JustWashedTheseJeans - 25/10/2016 01:05

Today, I pissed my pants in fear for the first time. Was I at a spooky haunted house? Nope, I turned a corner and got startled by a parked car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 208

You deserved it 1 938

Bystander

By Chops - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was walking from my office to the place I had parked my car, a distance of approximately three blocks. As I was about to round the last corner, I was forced to dive out of the way of a speeding car. When I looked up, I noticed that it was my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100 355

You deserved it 4 537

Community policing

By phant776 - 13/05/2011 04:02 - United States

Today, I was pulled over by a cop. He asked for my license and registration, so I reached for my center console. I was then greeted with a gun to my ear because my coffee cup supposedly looked like a gun. I stepped out of my car to apologize, and I was hit with a big stick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 467

You deserved it 9 322

By lamed - 04/12/2009 22:01 - United States

Today, I stopped by the gun store to pick up a new concealed weapon for protection. As I was leaving the store, a man came up behind me, hit me with a crowbar, and stole my gun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 228

You deserved it 14 798

poindextrr 2

Tuesday 10 April 2012 11:44

sounds like you live in the ideal neighbourhood!!!

Techtacular 0

Tuesday 10 April 2012 12:17

Now if that was really a gun, is your defense still puking?

Comments

Kristoffer 35

Tuesday 10 April 2012 16:22

YDI for throwing up at the sight of what you thought was a gun.

hateevryone 14

Tuesday 10 April 2012 16:51

And all that happened by you just assuming.

jaq_d 0

Tuesday 10 April 2012 16:59

You need to grow a pair and leave the drugs alone.

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 10 April 2012 17:04

How do you mistake a watering can for a gun? Have you never seen a gun before, even on TV? Kudos for throwing up though. Next time, aim at the would be robber. They usually leave in disgust without robbing you. Or they'll kill you in retribution.

Leftieswillrule 3

Tuesday 10 April 2012 17:09

Today I thought I was gonna get robbed at gunpoint but I didn't. FML

Bladian 5

Tuesday 10 April 2012 17:37

You deserve it for saying "bugged out"

hunteer9 5

Tuesday 10 April 2012 17:44

A good thing to know is that most guns are not very shiny, there designed that way so that guns don't glint and give your position away

alexxa143 0

Tuesday 10 April 2012 19:18

Your a moron guns aren't shiny-__- especially not in the dark!

j_cat187 19

Thursday 12 April 2012 0:24

Ahhh, but what about a shiny chrome piece?

tobedd 13

Tuesday 10 April 2012 19:47

Maybe if guns were not so readily available then people would feel safer sitting in their cars. Hmmmmmm

Princess_D33 9

Tuesday 10 April 2012 21:43

Maybe if people were more educated on how to properly use them, they would be better prepared to handle a situation like this one. Or they could tell the difference between a watering can and an FNP-45 Tactical.