Today, I left something in my boss's office. The door was closed which usually means she isn't in there, so I asked her coworker/friend for the key. When I opened the door, she screamed at me to get out of there. Turns out, she has just stopped breastfeeding her son and was pumping her breasts. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, at work, I was taking a woman's measurements while she held her screaming baby. To silence the infant, she whipped out her breast right there and started feeding him. Moments later, he puked breast milk all over my desk. FML
Today, a woman started breastfeeding her infant in a restaurant. Disgusted, I told her to take it to the bathroom, as I was eating. In response, she squirted me with milk then went back to ignoring me. FML
Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML
Today, I quit my job because I wasn't given the time or space to pump for my newborn child. I went back to work 4 weeks postpartum, and they suggested I pump in the bathroom, my car or the freezer. FML
Today, I went into my boss's office to confront her about not consulting me before switching my shifts with someone else. I left in tears. FML
Today, I accidentally left a small but very important piece of my breast pump at home. Only ten more hours until the end of my shift. FML
Today, my boss pulled me aside to chastise me for being "off task" because I was chatting with a co-worker while working on a project. She then spent a half hour chatting with the same person about what daycare she should go to for her new baby. FML
Today I left my 8-week-old with my brother so I could return to work. His wife took all the breast milk I'd packed out of the fridge and poured it out. According to her, it was “gross” and she didn’t want it near her food. My son is allergic to formula. FML
Today, my boss used the restroom at work. She returned and told me I needed to go clean the toilet because "someone left a mess in there." It was her mess. FML
Today, my manager came in and said, "Hey Alice, great job closing so well last night. NOT." and walked off. When I heard the door shut, I said, "And great job being a bitch, you cow." I heard my manager walking back towards me. She wasn't the one who'd left the room. FML
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Top comments
RoqueSand 0
You should've knocked! ydi
the17doctor 12
i think 3 was making an erection joke not realising the op is female.
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Comments (106)
dx169 0
real question is was she hot and can I get a hook up?
PaperMoon 0
Wow, awkward...
teehee520 0
Knock... But at least you're a woman not a man.
karstendag 0
pumping her breasts?
spamtastic404 0
you deserved it : you need to learn to always knock first.
DJ_Arashi 0
1.) Didn't your mother ever teach you to knock before entering a room? (Addendum: Always wait for a response. Knocking and immediately opening the door doesn't count.) 2.) Are you seriously still perturbed by seeing other people naked? At this point, it should elicit more of a "Whoops! I'll be on my way then." than any shock or horror.
Signposthead 0
Uh, the first point is right, but she never said she was "perturbed" at nakedness. Her boss yelled at her, the OP didn't say, whoops, gotta go. She had to leave. lol @28
HinduSpartan 2
I would just say nice ****
chemist 0
In Germany it wouldn't have been a problem at all!
fyourlife33 0
well we arent in germany so shut the **** up
maddibrahh 0
She was pumping her breasts at the office?
Chibi_fml 9
It means using a special little machine to remove milk from the breasts so that it can be put into a bottle and fed to the child that way. It's good for the mom because a) it removes excess milk the baby might not be drinking right away that might otherwise be painful and b) it allows someone else to feed the baby when she's not around.
Nightfallz 0
she shouldn't be doing that shit at work. she isn't getting paid to suck milk out her ****. report her.
Chibi_fml 9
Report her for what? This is such a hot topic that even if a company did think the boss was in the wrong, they wouldn't say anything about it. Besides that, she was doing it behind a closed door, so what difference does it make?
kyle_kbo20 0
wow your a fucktard #28
Jbot 0
"she isn't getting paid to suck milk out her ****." I loled at that one. Also, now you know to knock OP.
letitbe56 0
Clearly you're a man who knows nothing about breasts. If they don't get relieved of their milk it hurts like hell and is really bad for you. I agree that it would be more appropriate for her to pump them during breaks, but it's not something she can just wait until she gets home to do.
letitbe56 0
A good comparison would be not letting employees go to the bathroom because they're not getting paid to piss. Milk's just one more thing that needs to come out...
xbox_playa 0
youre right, i would report her. only problem is i dont think any1 else would care.
pam241 15
and you aren't getting paid to moderate fml's at work (I read your profile)