Weird, Creepy, Religion and Love: Oddball

Oddball

By Iwtumn - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Austria - Deutschlandsberg

Today, a guy asked me for my number. Now I deeply regret giving it to him, because he won't stop sending me Bible quotes and pictures of Jesus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 457

You deserved it 7 334

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

Y'all need him in your heart

By guess I deserved that one... - 11/10/2022 08:00

Today, I flirted and swapped numbers with an attractive married man. Later, when I texted him, he sent me a picture of Jesus and blocked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202

You deserved it 1 835

By sorejecteditmakesmewannacry - 29/08/2013 10:44 - France - Poissy

Today, I asked a cute guy for his number but instead he gave it to my gay friend. When my friend later called him, it turned out that he'd given him his number just to get rid of me and wasn't expecting him to call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 159

You deserved it 3 807

By Anonymous - 06/07/2013 11:26 - United States

Today, while out for lunch, a guy approached me and asked for my number. I politely declined. To my dismay, he dropped to his knees, grabbed his head, and started moaning about how nobody ever gives him a chance. I felt the accusing stares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 714

You deserved it 6 793

By WhoaThere - 18/12/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, a cute guy asked for my phone number and I gladly gave it to him. I was feeling really good about myself for getting hit on by the star football player. That was until he called 8 times and left 5 messages. In 2 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 476

You deserved it 9 649

Nice guy

By Anonymous - 18/09/2009 10:40 - Australia

Today, I finally worked up the courage to ask a cute guy for his number. Once he had given me his, he asked for mine. My initial happiness was deflated when he said, "OK, now I can just block every message from you," and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 645

You deserved it 4 530

By Anonymous - 20/04/2012 01:26 - United States

Today, I offered my phone number to the guy I've been flirting back and forth with all week. He said no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 751

You deserved it 4 028

By Nykole McAllister - 15/09/2018 17:30 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I was talking to a nice guy on a dating app and we exchanged numbers. Later, I got a call. It was his wife asking me to stop talking to her husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 096

You deserved it 276

By Anon - 14/08/2016 10:58 - United States - Tracy

Today, a cute guy came up to me and asked for my phone number. I was super excited and began to write it down when he said, "It doesn't have to be your real number, I'm not gonna call anyway." I still gave him my real number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 470

You deserved it 1 377

By helprelou - 29/06/2016 22:12 - France - La Chevroli?re

Today, a guy who likes me a little too much, and who I asked to tone his advances down a little, sent me a message on Twitter, Facebook and by text message to apologize. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 398

You deserved it 1 032

Hello, I love you

By Anonymous - 13/04/2020 05:00

Today, I had a very good-looking guy ask for my number while I was at work, but due to our policies I had to turn him down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 684

You deserved it 346

r_bruce69 19

Friday 1 May 2015 0:24

pray for it to stop

Zelphoric 25

Friday 1 May 2015 0:24

"No! No! God please no! no! no! noooooooooo!" -Michael scott

Comments

dakatabg 31

Friday 1 May 2015 1:16

You just met God

codytallica 38

Friday 1 May 2015 1:18

I'm wondering why he thinks you need Jesus.

vanessa3546 11

Friday 1 May 2015 1:26

Too funny

mine___turtles10 13

Friday 1 May 2015 1:27

He may be joking but you can never be sure

chikinscratch00 8

Friday 1 May 2015 1:31

I'm all for Christ. But thats weird

Loh_Superman 14

Friday 1 May 2015 1:33

He is my hero

dakotaabriannee 14

Friday 1 May 2015 1:33

Maybe it's a sign you need Jesus.

apaul982 14

Friday 1 May 2015 1:41

Have some faith that he'll stop

thefrikinbat 8

Friday 1 May 2015 1:45

he thought y'all needed Jesus

amanda182 19

Friday 1 May 2015 1:46

Block his number..

Keywords

Health Growing old Mental health Relatable Embarrassing Periods Job interview Awkward Work Education Love Social Media Stalker Instagram Animals Phobias Spiders Ironic Ecology Transportation Bikes Weird Parents Confused Kids AITA Drunk Poopoo peepee Geek Facebook

The Top

Today, my boss made me run yet another stupid errand. When I delivered the paperwork to his office, I saw an email printout on his desk. Apparently, he has a plan in the works to get me "fried" next month. I'm not sure whether to give him a letter of resignation or a bottle of barbecue sauce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 360

You deserved it 2 739

Today, one of my roommates bought new cowboy boots. He insists on wearing them indoors. Every morning he paces up and down the linoleum areas of the apartment with the boots on until he absolutely has to go to work, waking us up with the clomping noises. I and my other roommate work night and graveyard shifts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 71

The Top

Today, I learned that the person my ex-girlfriend left me for is my ex-girlfriend from before her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 937

You deserved it 136

Today, I took my 4-year-old son to the bank with me. He asked why we were going, and I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money. When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed that "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex". FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 633

You deserved it 4 573

Today, my girlfriend called me to pick her up from jail. She'd been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 890

You deserved it 4 382

Today, I almost got arrested. The cops put me in handcuffs without searching me first and told me that I "matched" the description of a package thief. Turns out, I didn't even closely fit the description of the suspect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 607

You deserved it 132

Today, I ordered a graduation cake from a woman at the grocery store. She asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I said "Congratulations Annie". Then she asked me who was ordering and I said "Annie". I had to order my own cake. The woman was silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 963

You deserved it 6 737

Today, I was shopping with my boyfriend when we came across the most beautiful piece of Japanese furniture. When I inspected it closely, my boyfriend started laughing. Turns out I was making the same noise I make when I orgasm in reaction to a piece of furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 883

You deserved it 4 854