Today, I came home from work and went into the bathroom. I saw a poo on the toilet lid, and thinking it was a trick toy that my son had got to trick me, I picked it up. It wasn't a toy. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms at work when I saw a young boy go in. Of course, I thought nothing of it until I had to use the bathroom myself ten minutes later. The kid had taken a shit and missed the toilet completely. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom. On my way back, I found a small piece of trash in the hallway so I picked it up. It was cat poop. FML
Today, I took an incredibly painful dump. After I cleaned myself up, I got up and was about to flush, until I saw something moving around in one of the logs of poop. It looked like an earthworm. It wasn't there when I sat down. FML
Today, I pooped in a drug store bathroom but forgot to flush. I left to go find my mom and found her in the toy section. I guess after I had walked away oblivious, a woman had walked into the bathroom behind me and found the kids I'd abandoned. She then came and found my mom and me, then yelled at me. FML
Today, I woke up early in the morning when it was still dark to go off to work. I saw what looked like a piece of slime that my children would play with and went to pick it up. Nope. Turns out it was puppy shit. Wet, slimy puppy waste. FML
Today, I was on the toilet and jumped when I saw a face at the window. It was my own reflection. FML
Today, I was at work at a kiosk in the mall when I smelled something foul. I thought it was the weird dude who'd just walked by so I just carried on with my work. Minutes later, I looked to my right and there, lying on the floor a few feet from me, was a huge turd wrapped in toilet paper. FML
Today, I woke up and went into the bathroom and noticed a dark mass in the toilet. Thinking someone took a dump and didn't flush, I approached the toilet ready to dispose of it. That's when I noticed its whiskers and ears. It was a rat, and it was alive. FML
Today, I dropped my trash into what I thought was a garbage can. My co-workers stared at me like I had just pissed myself. It was a toy collection box for children in foster care. FML
Today, while eating dinner, my child picked up a piece of their chicken off the floor and put it in their mouth. It wasn’t until during bath time did I realize it wasn't chicken but poop that fell out of their diaper. FML
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Top comments
Boston_4_Life 3
Shit happens
hoedang 3
haha if it looks like poo, smells like poo, is warm like poo, it's probably poo
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Comments (120)
TheJester12 15
tastes mysterious brown object laying on toilet seat* ...wow these prank fake poops toys do NOT taste like chocolate like advertised ..... wait, no , no, it couldn't be it... EWWWWW!!! WHAT HAVE I DONE?!?!?
SukiIzumi 8
Even is it was a prank, why would you want to pick something up, with your hands, that is laying on the toilet seat? Makes no sense..
KiddNYC1O 22
When I see shit on or in the toilet, I usually think it's real shit.
bubo_fml 11
"If it's yellow, let it mellow...If it's brown, flush it down!"
rachbat00 0
I agree with #1
coldashell 23
Never heard of fake chuds that would work on a toilet seat. Why wouldn't you use toilet paper to pick it up just in case it were real?
CRC_101 31
It would have been more effective to investigate by poking it with a stick while simultaneously saying "poke poke."
MissFits_fml 6
I love Avenged Sevenfold too, OP!! Oh, and yeah. FYL.
dragynfyre 4
sad to say, YDI. who picks up mysterious poo? I'm so paranoid about things like that, if I see a soggy looking brown item anywhere, much less the toilet, I bust out the rubber gloves, paper towels, plastic baggies, and disinfectant.
Hakan1218 5
Shitty situation.