Today, I’m a happily married man and I know this because my wife says so all the time. E.g., we don’t need marriage counselling because we’re happily married; you're not moving out because we’re happily married, and the latest, we don’t need a divorce because we’re happily married. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband and I finally agreed on something: marriage counseling. FML
Today, my marriage counselor got divorced. FML
Today, I was having a chat with a customer. He asked if I was married, to which I replied, "No." Before I could say anything else, he said, "Thought so. You look too happy to be married." I was about to mention that I just got engaged. FML
Today, my parents tried to convince me to get a divorce. My wife and I are perfectly fine. FML
Today, I officially became a divorced marriage counselor. FML
Today, a year after we agreed to a divorce, my wife and I are still married and living together because it's not financially possible for us to split. We get along well enough, but I'm ready to move on. She's already moving on, according to the boyfriend she's been seeing for months. FML
Today, after receiving our marriage certificate, I told my wife about it. She responded with "fml". FML
Today, a girl that I've been falling for told me that she's married. But not to worry, that "won't get in the way of 'us'." FML
Today, I've never been so lonely nor felt so romantically neglected as when I got married. FML
Today, my husband's friend and I realised that we have mutual feelings of attraction for each other. We're both in struggling marriages, which we don't want to give up on yet. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Your wife is using Goebbels' Big Lie Theory. Eventually, you'll believe you are happily married because your wife is repeating that you're happily married over and over again. Congrats on being happily married!
Plop 17
There's a river in Egypt your wife needs to learn about...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (5)
Plop 17
There's a river in Egypt your wife needs to learn about...
RichardPencil 32
Your wife is using Goebbels' Big Lie Theory. Eventually, you'll believe you are happily married because your wife is repeating that you're happily married over and over again. Congrats on being happily married!
randybryant799 21
Stop acting like a doormat. If you want out get out.
RichardPencil 32
What's wrong with being a doormat? Doormats always stay at home and no one ever cheats on a doormat. It's not like people sneak over to the neighbors to wipe their feet on their doormat. He's happily married!
kevinwm0 15
Have you heard the joke about the gas lighter? No? Yeah you have. Nope? Yes - You HAVE! I literally told you the joke yesterday.
JasonThorn 23
"Honey, if you have to work THIS HARD to convince me 'we're happily married'...then we're NOT."