Babies, Cute and Kids: Judgemental

Judgemental

By ugly - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my sister told me not to come over anymore because her baby is scared of my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 397

You deserved it 4 531

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Same thing different taste

By bigscarypuppy - 22/08/2009 05:39 - United States

Today, my sister went into early labor. Instead of telling me, my mom turned to my dog and said, "Guess what? You're going to be an uncle!" Our dog ranks higher than me in our family's metaphorical food chain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 595

You deserved it 3 244

Hard no

By badsitter - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, my mother stopped speaking to me because I won’t let her babysit anymore. Her idea of babysitting is to sit my daughter alone with a tablet and a pile of sugary junk food for 7 hours straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 667

You deserved it 348

Scary!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, all because he's scared of my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 206

You deserved it 5 870

Surprising

By Anonymous - 28/11/2019 20:00

Today, my younger sister had some friends over at ours. I was in the shower but was horrified to realize my clothes and towel were gone. Figuring that she took them, I tried to make it to my room without being seen, but one of her friends came up to use the bathroom. She saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 104

You deserved it 311

Second class citizen

By crapped on - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my family went on vacation. I had to stay home to take care of everyone's animals. I called my mom, who said she was too busy to talk to me. When my sister asked her who was on the phone, she replied, "The dog sitter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 547

You deserved it 4 255

Devious

By rachel - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Germany - Köln

Today, my little brother told me to give him my phone so he could play a game on it. I said no, because I was taking a call from a friend at the time. He then walked over to the wall, headbutted it, burst into tears, then told my parents that I punched him. They believed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 993

You deserved it 3 901

By justsomesummer - 26/01/2016 18:09 - United States - Beaverton

Today, I got a new babysitting job. Every time the little girl goes to the bathroom, she screams and cries until I wipe her. She's 7 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 903

You deserved it 1 662

Demon child

By PeanutlyDisabled - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 777

You deserved it 3 384

Too late

By dumpedtaco - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, as I was planning my impending nuptials with my fiancé, my sister jokingly told him it's not too late to call it off. He took her seriously and bailed. He won’t answer my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 359

You deserved it 451

By thatonekid - 27/07/2009 23:10 - United States

Today, my best friend told me she was pregnant over the phone. While in the middle of telling her congrats, she told me it was with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 474

You deserved it 3 545

Saltime 0

Sunday 26 June 2011 16:20

Did the baby tell her that? No? Then she has no proof.

davie101 0

Sunday 26 June 2011 16:22

That is what brown bags are made for- don't forget the eye slits. just a suggestion...

Comments

lemonsquid 6

Sunday 26 June 2011 23:01

eep... that would of hurt my heart. scare the baby!! no I'm kidding. that would totally hurt me...

CaptainAwesome2 0

Sunday 26 June 2011 23:16

Lmao this is the funniest fml I've read all day xD

tbone666 0

Sunday 26 June 2011 23:39

paper bag anyone???

Xjelly95 0

Monday 27 June 2011 0:02

If your a man, thats ok. Sometimes babies are just afraid of a manly face lol

joxynn 2

Monday 27 June 2011 0:07

Well damn...fyl indeed.

hatelife07 0

Monday 27 June 2011 0:27

sorry to hear that ur face is not ugly don't listen to them

XxbrokeNCYDExX 6

Monday 27 June 2011 1:05

I agree with #2

idgts 0

Monday 27 June 2011 1:09

are you emo by some chance?

jemama 1

Monday 27 June 2011 1:36

At least it means you're out of babysitting duties! No smelly nappies to change!!

Faceeater24 0

Monday 27 June 2011 1:49

Rape. thats all im gonna say

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The Top

Today, I've finally got my mental health under control after decades of flailing. I also started showing signs of Serotonin Syndrome, which is caused by my meds and could result in seizure and death. So my choices are the swirling void of depression or possibly just the void. FML

I agree, your life sucks 497

You deserved it 92

Today, the coworker I have been hitting it off with rejected me. Apparently she has a crush on another male employee. An employee who is married and somehow has three other girls in our store actually fighting over him (I've heard arguments). She thinks she has a chance? FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 181

The Top

Today, the kids I was babysitting somehow found a pair of my underwear. They asked if they could use them to go parachuting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 272

You deserved it 6 999

Today, after having my Wi-Fi unlocked for two years, I decided to lock it since it was running slowly. Everybody in my apartment building came to my door and asked me why I did it. I've been unknowingly providing free Wi-Fi to the entire building for years, but now that it's protected I'm getting constant dirty looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 742

You deserved it 3 290

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for well over an hour while riding it up to my weight and fitness class. Very funny, universe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 031

You deserved it 9 471

Today, I confronted my husband about the sexts between him and another woman. He says it’s “just chatting” and “It’s not like I’m gonna do it in real life, I got you baby.” He called me unreasonable for getting upset. He’s sulking right now because I refused to fix him dinner tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 682

You deserved it 99

Today, taking the train to work after the worst hangover ever, two immense fat women start talking about rim jobs. I got up to switch cabins just in time for their conversation to switch over to RECEIVING rim jobs. I sprayed puke all over myself and an innocent bystander. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 248

You deserved it 4 746

Today, I woke up because I really had to pee. I got out of bed, went to the bathroom and went back to bed. Or so I thought. I did pee, but I only dreamed that I got out of bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 159

You deserved it 4 318

Same thing different taste

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