Healthy Lifestyle, TV shows, Movies and Health: Inspiring

Inspiring

By indierocklove - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I finally started doing cardio and getting in shape. What motivated me to do it? Watching a zombie movie. The slow ones bite the dust first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 738

You deserved it 8 936

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

Ready, steady…

By dan - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Reserved

Today, we had a sprint race in gym class that I wasn't looking forward to because I'm a little chubby. The race started and I shot off as fast as I could, somehow in the lead. Everyone was cheering. When I was nearing the finish line I turned around, only to see the race hadn't started yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 675

You deserved it 9 154

Gym bro

By kaplwv116 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my extremely in-shape boyfriend told me he hasn't had a chance to work out lately. I jokingly poked him in the belly saying he's getting chunky and winked. He burst into tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 054

You deserved it 41 205

By dumbo - 30/07/2009 14:43 - United States

Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 876

You deserved it 18 911

Back to square one

By nurseITHINKNOT - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I finally started my job as an in-home caregiver. The man I was hired to care for died two hours after I made it to his house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 797

You deserved it 3 947

Not the smartest

By ugh Buck! - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 465

You deserved it 4 540

Misunderstanding

By vanessa_d15 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I was together with a few of my friends when I got up the courage to confess I have an eating disorder. One of my friends then said "... but you're not skinny." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 108

You deserved it 6 735

This is a low

By Stella - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I chipped my tooth on a beer bottle. While I was drinking alone in my basement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 354

You deserved it 28 772

Debate perverts

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, my music students began a lively debate about whether or not a music stand would make a good weapon for the zombie apocalypse. What am I teaching them? FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 634

You deserved it 960

By stressedartist - 09/09/2016 12:43 - United States

Today, I ran over Oprah. FML

I agree, your life sucks 499

You deserved it 70

Instant cure

By Username - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff

Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 572

You deserved it 4 942

Laterial 3

Thursday 4 August 2011 0:08

Gotta love Zombieland!

frutoish 0

Thursday 4 August 2011 0:07

That's what got me going. Gotta survive the zombie apocalypse.

Comments

Lifesuckslemons 0

Thursday 4 August 2011 2:45

Zombie land ?

Stylin_Since_97 10

Thursday 4 August 2011 2:47

Not in Shawn of the Dead!!!!

Tarak_fml 7

Thursday 4 August 2011 2:49

Zombieland ftw! Favorite movie ever

Tarak_fml 7

Thursday 4 August 2011 2:49

Zombieland ftw! Favorite movie ever

sinjax 6

Thursday 4 August 2011 2:54

If that's your incentive, go for it.

kelsey_katie 17

Thursday 4 August 2011 2:56

That would make me want to excise too(: Inlike your thinking!

xrainbowshadowx 17

Thursday 4 August 2011 3:04

Why is this an FML? You found a motivation to get in shape. You should be happy

r9e7v 7

Thursday 4 August 2011 3:09

121 it wasn't the same sentence.

h0ward076 0

Thursday 4 August 2011 3:09

never know when the zombies are coming best be prepared!!

LeGiTbUrN 0

Saturday 1 October 2011 7:45

Zombies are never coming they don't excist

mirandom24 10

Thursday 4 August 2011 3:13

Don't forget your seatbelt ;)

Keywords

Weird Miscellaneous Shopping My ex Awkward Relatable Racism Family AITA Kids Love Cheating Work Break-ups Cute Cats Animals Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Coworkers Alcohol Mental health Psychology Health Neighbours Cops Scary Stressed out Parents

The Top

Today, I've been sexting a mysterious guy from New Jersey. I was getting hot, so I decided to say, "I want you to be my first." Suddenly, my officemate who was two desks away from me waved her phone in hand and shouted, "You're a virgin?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 698

You deserved it 676

Today, while fighting unemployment and an visible abscess on my neck, I was cajoled into attending my Mom's birthday party. I spent the entire time at the restaurant trying to hide an oozing sore with a bandage, eating partially edible food. The cost? $40 I can't afford to spend on food not worth $5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 107

The Top

Today, I realized that my mom has not had a date, or had sex, in 50 years. I've become her 'Husband-Son'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 868

You deserved it 181

Today, I got my grades back. I got a very poor evaluation for my lit class, which was odd because it didn't match the impression from my end-of-class meeting with the professor. It does, however, include a nod to the supposedly-anonymous negative class review I gave her, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 152

You deserved it 1 674

Today, I found out my boss was quiet-firing me on purpose. Apparently, his daughter who works at this same company is pregnant now and needs a promotion. I have a Master’s and have been here for 9 years. She dropped out of college because it was “too hard” and the other day she put a metal spoon in the microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 090

You deserved it 74

Today, my boyfriend confided to me that he has a used condom collection. When I reacted with disgust, he "reassured" me that he only keeps the ones he uses with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 495

You deserved it 2 992

Today, I got a housekeeping warning from my landlord. After struggling with multiple serious health issues, I’ve also been dealing with a horrible case of depression as a result. When I tried to explain this to the manager, she decided to get the county involved and try to have me committed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 916

You deserved it 204

Today, I told my parents that what I'd really like for my 21st birthday is the 1865 edition of the Memoirs of Saint-Simon in 22 volumes that I found online for $200, and have been wanting for months. They laughed and said, "Yeah, right. We'll get you an iPhone and perhaps you'll become normal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 774

You deserved it 9 834

Same thing different taste

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