Today, I'm an overweight guy who has lost 40lbs, and I found out my online dating profile was disabled for encouraging violence. It was a picture of me, in a bulletproof vest, in my uniform at work, because it was the best picture I got thanks to my weight loss journey, and I'm only 50 pounds away. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I discovered that a company has been using a photo of me for one of those "she lost 50 pounds" online ads. I'm the "before" photo. FML
Today, I came to terms with the fact that in order to get a boyfriend, I need to slim down. When I put full-body shots on dating apps, I get swiped left on. But when I put headshots, I get matches. And lots of them. But I can’t catfish these dudes. Time to go on a diet and hit the gym. It’s not fair. FML
Today, I finally met the guy I've been talking to online for a year. I'd dropped 10lbs off my weight. He'd shaved 20 years off his age. FML
Today, the guy I've recently started seeing confided that he's relieved I'm on the heavier side, and that he has a thing for watching chubby women eat. I just reached my ideal weight after losing 40 pounds. FML
Today, I quit dating forever. I’m an overweight girl with glasses. I attempted to put flattering selfies on dating profiles, but the guys run from me or ghost me when I meet them in person. I took a friend’s advice and put honest, full body pics of myself. I got zero messages. None. I give up. FML
Today, I was dumped by my boyfriend of 2 years. I'd been involved in an accident that severely hurt my right leg. As a result, I couldn't work out and gained 35 pounds, also due to stress eating and some meds I’m taking. Apparently I’m no longer attractive and he can’t have people thinking he’s a “chubby chaser.” FML
Today, I discovered that the upside of losing weight is that men have started hitting on me. The downside? They're all twice my age. FML
Today, I realized that being 60 pounds lighter has made every guy that crossed my path worship the ground I walk on. When I had the weight, guys would flinch at me, or not give me the time of day. I just want to be treated as a human being, no matter what size I am. FML
Today, I officially completed my weight loss journey, only for my wife, who'd previously threatened to divorce me if I didn't lose weight, to tell me that she realized she liked me better when I was fat and that "you don't know what you have until it's gone." FML
Today, the man of my dreams who I met online and have been exchanging messages with day and night for weeks asked the dreaded question: “Can you send me a full body pic?” It’s been 5 years since I had a guy hit me up. I weigh 300 lbs and look like a potato with legs. I don’t wanna lose him. FML
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Top comments
Nikki 17
It sounds like your life is going great, who cares about online dating when you’re killing it at getting healthy, you’ll be able to meet plenty of people in person the way you are going!
Plop 17
Maybe you shouldn't have written "I'll shoot a full load inside all of you!" in your bio.
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Comments (4)
Nikki 17
It sounds like your life is going great, who cares about online dating when you’re killing it at getting healthy, you’ll be able to meet plenty of people in person the way you are going!
Moezzz 6
H
RichardPencil 32
"This time, baby, I'll be bulletproof!" Just explain to the site you're a big La Roux fan.
Plop 17
Maybe you shouldn't have written "I'll shoot a full load inside all of you!" in your bio.