Today, awaiting the end of my shift at a call centre, I received my last call. The caller had a riddle: “What’s a cow’s favorite place to go? The moooo-vies!” He then laughed like a hyena and hung up. I wish I could pay my rent with riddles. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML
Today, while I was working at a call center, a customer was pranking me using an obviously fake Asian accent. He kept saying his name was “Phuck Mi”, his phone number was 666-3629 (as in "Sex sex sex free sex tonight") and making moaning noises and sexual phrases. I don’t get paid enough for this. FML
Today, I had an important appointment for a job. During the interview, my cellphone rang. My ringtone is "Denver, the last Dinosaur". FML
Today, I was so bored at my job as a receptionist that I actually got excited when the phone rang. FML
Today, the phone lines at work have been cutting out in the middle of calls. I'm a receptionist at an animal hospital. I now have less than two minutes to figure out what's wrong with a client's pet and how best to schedule them before I become "That rude bitch who hung up on me." FML
Today, I got a phone call. I thought it was just one of these toll free numbers that were always calling so when I answered the phone, I said, “City morgue: you stab 'em, we slab 'em! How may I help you?” It was my college calling to discuss my grades. FML
Today, I had to sleep in a room with my son, since we are visiting relatives at a farm. Every time a cow moos, he says "Cow". I can't sleep. FML
Today, I thought I was alone in the breakroom, so as I reheated my lunch, I started practicing my stand-up comedy routine out loud. I was halfway through a joke about constipation when the vending machine guy poked his head out from behind the vending machine he was restocking and said, “Don’t quit your day job.” FML
Today, I got a missed call from a job that I really really want. I completely forgot that my answer machine message was a ridiculous and rude poem that I recorded previously when I was drunk. Somehow I don't think I'll be getting a call back. FML
Today, the company offering the job position that I've been applying for called me up. I wasn't there to answer so they got redirected to my voice mail in which I'm acting like a drunk David Hasselhoff chewing on a cheeseburger. They called me 5 times. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
You can, become a writer for Jeopardy. By the way, the joke is dumb because cows really don't like movies.
Marcella1016 32
How would you know? Have a degree in cowmunications from UC Bovine?
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Comments (2)
RichardPencil 32
You can, become a writer for Jeopardy. By the way, the joke is dumb because cows really don't like movies.
Marcella1016 32
How would you know? Have a degree in cowmunications from UC Bovine?
protoskore 27
at least it's better than the old "what's brown and sounds like a bell?"