Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML
Today, my mother went through my bag and found what she thought was rolling papers. I was yelled at and called a stupid pothead with no future. They were facial blotting papers. FML
Today I’d been saving a weed cigarette, which is legal where we live, until my parents went on holiday. I had just sparked up when they came back home after dad forgot his passport. The lecture I had to endure went on for so long, I think I’d have preferred an old-fashioned beating. FML
Today, my mother lectured me about going to the bar too often. She did this while rolling a joint. FML
Today, my mom talked to me and my brother about how great it was that our cousin was getting away from drugs and becoming sober, as he would have so many more opportunities opened up for him now. She explained all this while sitting on our patio, smoking a blunt. FML
Today, my dad sat me down and angrily accused me of doing drugs, all because he's noticed I've recently become a lot more energetic and emotional than usual. The truth is, I'd been smoking weed daily for 3 years and just decided to never smoke it again 2 weeks ago. FML
Today, my mom told me she was getting tired of the smell of marijuana in the house. So I confessed and told her I'll never bring it home again. She was talking about my neighbors. FML
Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
nadnerbz 6
Here come all the weed debates...
kamikrazy 6
Police officer: How high are you. Pothead: No officer, it's "Hi, how are you"?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (191)
kjtk 2
I smoke weed everyday to control pain. I just graduated top of my class in university. So yes people who smoke weed can go far in life. People who have such a closed off mind don't go anywhere in life.
ungawd 3
Didn't Bill Clinton smoke the reefer? Wasn't he President? There's tons of successful people that smoke weed. Your parents are stupid.
davek 36
Carl Sagan. 'Nuff said.
furbyface711 9
Don't generalize. Just because most of the people on here who smoke weed are lazy and don't do anything with there lives doesn't mean we all are. I smoke everyday and I'm a PhD student. Its not weed that causes people to do nothing, it's lazy people using weed as an excuse.
lyssasaysrawr16 3
I am 17 years old. I have a job that I work 8 hours a day mostly everyday of the week. I'm female. And I believe that if on my day when i wanna smoke a blunt than who the front door are you to tell me it makes me a loser? It's my decision. My life. It doesn't concern you. Nor does anyone else who smokes.
wironandine 8
False
DriAA7 17
This bickering within the comments is ridiculous. I'm surprised they aren't deactivated by now. Most people know that marijuana is illegal for political reason. Do you really think the government made it illegal because they care about our health? Really? Come on now, people.
tbenson0628 14
i....um....ooohh, chips...........oh yeah,....toootally do ....not....oooh pretty...agreee with...your statement there sir. *five minutes later* what was the question bro?....hey dude, .....where's my car?! lol
DriAA7 17
And saying that someone is successful while smoking is equivalent to saying someone is a loser while smoking: it depends on the person, not the weed. You have to already have that motivation to do, or lack it to not do, something with your life.
itooamscrewed 10
That's like saying all people who drink are wastes of life too. The key is when you do it, how often you do it, and what you do besides that. For instance, if I come home and smoke a joint after work, it's not any worse than someone who comes home and has a glass of wine with dinner (unless you work in law enforcement or something). If you can successfully maintain a job, (at my age) school, a social life, and still smoke, then you're not a waste of life and you are amounting to things.