Today, I asked an elderly customer at my work if she needed help with her groceries. She responded, "I normally would, but I'm afraid you'll eat all the groceries." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, an elderly woman couldn't afford all of her groceries at the checkout so she started to take out a few things. I offered to pay for her groceries; she thanked me and walked out. An onlooker then came up to me and told me that she does it to someone every week. FML
Today, at the supermarket, an old lady asked for directions to the produce aisle. Having read way too many stories lately on this very site about awful elderly folks, I was wary, but helped her out. She gave me an awkward hug in thanks, lifting my wallet in the process, as I later found out. FML
Today, I saw an elderly woman struggling to reach the top shelf in my local grocery store, so I went over and asked if she needed help. She then accused me of flirting with her and had me escorted from the property. FML
Today, I was at the supermarket when an elderly lady asked if I'd grab some coffee for her from a high shelf. The moment I took my hands off my almost-full shopping cart, she made off with it. I ended up getting thrown out by security after she claimed I was trying to steal it from her. FML
Today, I tried helping an old lady with her groceries. When I asked if she needed help she smiled. When I took one of her bags she yelled. I didn't know she was deaf. FML
Today, I was at the mall, when I saw an elderly lady drop her groceries, so I rushed over to help her pick them up. She took one look at me, called me a "Liberal bastard," and shouted for me to get away from her before she called the cops. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping, when an elderly lady walked up to me and tripped over her own feet. I caught her by the arm, at which point she shrieked at me for "groping" her. She ended up smirking as security threw me out of the store. FML
Today, I was helping my elderly landlady (75 years old) carry in her groceries. She said "Thanks" and then handed me a notice of eviction. FML
Today, I was strolling past an old women when from behind me she called, "Can you help me get the rest of the groceries out of the car?" I approached the car, and helped her unload bags. She began hitting me, screaming, "SOMEONE IS STEALING MY THINGS". She was actually asking her son in the car. FML
Today, while at my cosmetics job, an elderly lady came up to me asking for a product. I told her we had a smaller size and a larger size for a better deal. She told me she wanted the smaller size because she'd "probably be dead" before she finished that one. I laughed. She was serious. FML
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Top comments
Tripartita 45
"Well, I've got to commend you on still going out in public with such bizarre and specific paranoid fantasies. It must be very difficult for you to see other people and fight against all the stereotype-driven fears that flood your mind. You're quite a hero."
RichardPencil 32
Too bad you've got to hold back and remember that "the customer's always right" BS. Otherwise, it'd be "Clean up on Aisle 5!"
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Comments (33)
mackdeezy 22
Well what's eating her?
nonsensical 26
It's amazing how little the elderly care about how rude they are... Will we be just as blunt when we're that age? There's definitely more fun in life that way! I work at a retirement home and I hear these things (and worse) all the time. Don't take it personally OP!
whatcase 16
Don't let it touch you. Even if she was serious.
icefishbaby 14
I don't think she was literally worried about OP eating the groceries; she was making a comment about her weight. I'm not sure what you mean about her being serious.
DoomedGemini 38
I think he means if she made a poorly thought out joke or if she was intentionally being malicious.
RichardPencil 32
Too bad you've got to hold back and remember that "the customer's always right" BS. Otherwise, it'd be "Clean up on Aisle 5!"
childproofpizza 19
My dream is to open a restaurant (grill and bar), and if I do, I'm gonna post a sign that says "The customer is always right (except when they're a dumbass)"
Tripartita 45
"Well, I've got to commend you on still going out in public with such bizarre and specific paranoid fantasies. It must be very difficult for you to see other people and fight against all the stereotype-driven fears that flood your mind. You're quite a hero."
Kitsi 14
"That's too bad. I was worried you'd break a hip. Good luck."
cheshireau 26
I would have said something along the lines of 'and I think you'd go nicely with some fava beans and a nice chianti.' I know it makes you seem like a cannibal, but if she wants to go there, you take it to the next level.
trucker2 33
On the loud speaker- can any available associate help this elderly woman, carry her diapers...
Scotth901 22
"Maybe you should get some better glasses, because it's not the size that matters, it's how you use it."
cuz803 46
What does that have to do with this FML?
cuz803 46
That or he promotes irrelevance
MidnaLink 35
Tell everyone to not help the old bitch if they see her. If she's going to be THAT rude when you want to help, then she can pack and bag her own shit.
LyricaSilvan 30
Yes, because refusing to help someone out of context and encouraging coworkers to follow suit absolutely won't harm OP's chances at keeping their job.