Kids: Great start

Great start

By whytoday - 14/05/2011 06:50 - United States

Today, on the first day of my nanny job, I wanted to impress my employers with how trustworthy and responsible I am. During the sixty seconds that I went to pee, the two-year-old found a black Sharpie and scribbled all over the wall. Nail polish remover made it ten times worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 450

You deserved it 8 350

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 22/03/2017 17:00 - United States - Troy

Today, I saw some pretty heinous graffiti on the urinal stall at school, so I opted to scribble it out. A supervisor came in the second the pen touched the stall. Now I have detention and have to scrub the entire stall clean as a "lesson". FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 349

You deserved it 1 682

Parenting fail

By Anonymous - 21/01/2020 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I left the living room for 3 minutes to make a coffee. When I went back, my 4-year old had found a permanent marker, God knows where, since I don't own a permanent marker. She'd then drawn on her face, the carpet, wall, sofa, both dogs and as an added bonus the TV screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 977

You deserved it 525

By anonymous - 26/01/2013 08:42 - United States - Fairbanks

Today, while babysitting my neighbors' kids, their oldest son used a paint pen on the carpet. The boy blamed me and I got fired. He's only 3 and can barely talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 197

You deserved it 5 643

By Anonymous - 11/09/2011 19:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 238

You deserved it 3 179

So sweet

By Mom of 3 - 07/10/2018 15:30

Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 952

You deserved it 428

Own it

By psychortiz - 03/06/2009 17:40 - United States

Today, I allowed my five-year old daughter to paint my fingernails during a living-room "picnic" we were having. A while later I got called back in to work for an emergency meeting. When I arrived at the meeting I noticed my fingernails were still neon-green. I am a 40-year old man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 610

You deserved it 16 708

Creative

By Kymberly Hams - 09/04/2019 10:00 - Australia

Today, my toddler was supposed to be taking a nap. Instead, he decided it was the perfect time to remove his own nappy for the first time ever. He painted his walls, floor, bed and body, then started crying because he was dirty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 045

You deserved it 338

No kidding

By Ted - 08/05/2024 22:00 - Australia

Today, I volunteered to babysit my niece. How hard can it be to entertain a toddler for a few hours? Turns out, very hard. Within minutes, she'd turned the living room into a war zone, with crayon graffiti and a trail of sticky handprints leading to who knows where. By the time her parents got back, I was ready to sign up for a lifetime supply of earplugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 138

You deserved it 307

By Anonymous - 27/04/2011 19:16 - United States

Today, I awoke to make-up all over my face and nail polish on my hands and feet because my daughter wanted "daddy to look pretty." I have a job interview in an hour and none of it is coming off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 531

You deserved it 5 360

By fired - 13/05/2012 06:26 - United States - Portland

Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 664

You deserved it 46 971

wazzup182FML 3

Saturday 14 May 2011 11:55

you take 60 seconds to pee XD

LaylaFurious 0

Saturday 14 May 2011 12:12

use the mr. clean magic eraser extra strength! works like a charm lol.

Comments

robin26_fml 0

Saturday 14 May 2011 16:52

next time you have to go pee put the child in a play pin or play yard. or in his room or wherever he plays with a baby gate up so that he is in a safe room and you know that he can't get out. Crack the bathroom door so that you can hear him. Or if possible try and wait for nap time to take potty breaks.

mystra 1

Saturday 14 May 2011 17:11

shoulda used rubbing alcohol. it works a dream for sharpie on paint

TFNLbosox 0

Saturday 14 May 2011 17:25

were you fired?

haniam16 6

Saturday 14 May 2011 17:32

try using hand sanitized, that cleans it all off much easier

vickilouise 1

Saturday 14 May 2011 17:49

magic eraser

softballer22 0

Saturday 14 May 2011 18:00

eraser & hand sanitizer gets permanent marker off well.

GetPuckedUp 3

Saturday 14 May 2011 18:01

use baking soda, that'll work.

monnanon 13

Saturday 14 May 2011 18:24

Everybody needs to lay off OP. What on earth do you think parents do when they are at home all day, only pee when the kids is asleep? It is perfectly fine to leavea kid for a few secs while you go to the toilet, if you can't then you need to sort the kid out.

mellb_fml 3

Saturday 14 May 2011 19:36

It doesn't matter what parents do, no one's paying them to look after the kid and if something happens it's their fault, you have to be more careful with things that aren't yours :P

birds_fml 7

Saturday 14 May 2011 18:55

I clicked YDI cause you tried nail polish remover (ineffective) instead of rubbing alcohol (works like magic).

jayAZ 3

Saturday 14 May 2011 19:07

This shows your lack of knowledge regarding sharpie...they should know their child is capable of such and blame should be minor...at least from a Parents POV. everyone need time to take a bathroom break...sixty seconds, find that hard to believe if so much was drawn. good luck!