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What a stupid, stupid man! You'll eventually feel lucky you didn't marry that one. It's like suggesting Pepsi when you want a Porsche.

kids are a deal breaker for some people, and not everyone views adoption as a 1 to 1 equivalent. I don't know how he went about telling you, but in my opinion it's a valid reason to call off a wedding. better that than him slowly growing resentful towards you.

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What a stupid, stupid man! You'll eventually feel lucky you didn't marry that one. It's like suggesting Pepsi when you want a Porsche.

Looks like you dodged a bullet.

kids are a deal breaker for some people, and not everyone views adoption as a 1 to 1 equivalent. I don't know how he went about telling you, but in my opinion it's a valid reason to call off a wedding. better that than him slowly growing resentful towards you.

I feel your pain. This is a terrible letdown and certainly not your fault. It is better however to end an engagement than to end a marriage. For some people being able to have children is extremely important. It’s not rational, it biological and has been driving evolution for eons. If the need is to mother or father a child adoption can be a blessing. If the need is to create a copy of yourself to live on in the world, then adoption may not be the desired thing. And by the way I have one natural and one adopted child… OP, there will be others out there who will love you for who you are. Unlike dream romance novels, there is more than one good mate for each of us. Not everyone matches, but there is more than one good match. In the future do not hold back on the fact that you cannot have children naturally, it’s better to find out things like that sooner than later. But I wouldn’t volunteer it on a first date.

She didn't hold out on that info though. She just found out just like he did. It was as much of a surprise to her as it was to him. This must be a discussion though. A where do you see yourself in the future, kids or no kids discussion. An adoption vs bio kids discussion. A discussion you have when things start to get more serious and you start seeing if your plans for the future align. I'm not sure of your wording if you meant you were saying she held the info back or if you were saying for future relationships, do this. Kind of hard to tell via text on a screen.

I understand that the infertility was news both to OP and her fiancé. She was not holding out any information. I am suggesting that in the future now that she knows this situation that at the appropriate time it should be discussed. That way there are no last minute future surprises like this. But it’s not something you want to bring up too soon or she will sound like she’s rushing the relationship. Basically I agree with you.

Yeah, I'm sure he was just trying to be gentle. Didn't want to say there really isn't anything else like creating life with the one you love the most Hope you're handling it well.

He called her useless. That's your idea of gentle?

You are better off without him. Someone like that just sees you as an incubator, not a person, he didn't love you. You will find someone who loves you for you. Also, if you were able to have children would you want someone like that raising your daughter?? You dodged a bullet.