Today, my girlfriend met an old family friend who I used to hate. Their interaction was courteous, but included the jab that he'd lost a bunch of weight after High School, while I'd packed it on. That night during sex, she called me by his name. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ran into an old friend of mine at the store. All was going fine, until she showed me her new fiancé. My now ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, I saw my friend's ex and noticed she had gained a ton of weight since he dated her and had been dating someone else. It reminded me of my friend, so I messaged him and made a joke about her being unrecognizable. He informed me that they started seeing each other again last week. FML
Today, I was meeting my husband's old friends at his 20 year high school reunion. He introduced me as his 'friend from work' to his ex girlfriend. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's grandmother's house meeting her for the first time. I excused myself to the restroom and as I walked out of the room I heard her say, "You could do a lot better. She's fat." Then I heard my boyfriend reply, "I know." FML
Today, my husband invited a couple of his college friends over for dinner. While we were in the middle of eating, one of them asked loudly, "Hey, whatever happened to that fat bitch you dated in your third year?" We've been dating since his second year. FML
Today, I was having an after work-out dinner with my ex-girlfriend and we were having a great time, catching up, eating good food, all the good things. Then when I got home, I realized I just talked to my ex-girlfriend for an hour and a half about how much better her new boyfriend is than me. FML
Today, I went to the store and ran into an old friend that I hadn't seen in years. We chatted a little, and just as I was leaving he grabbed his mobile phone. Later, I added him on Facebook. Turns out the last thing he posted was a picture of my back saying: "Look who got even fatter." FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. In order to make a good impression, I was as polite as possible, and tried to be as engaging as I could. Near the end of dinner, my girlfriend's mom says, "I liked your old boyfriend better." FML
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his best friend. Who just so happened to be the guy who made my high school years a living hell. FML
Today, we travelled back to England to meet my fiance's family. Turns out her cousin is a guy I hated from high school. I tried to be an adult, but we began sniping insults at each other like we used to. By the end of the night, we realised we actually missed hating each other and are now, ew, frenemies. FML
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Top comments
Boyufd 25
you might want to end that now buddy before it escalates
xaddrus 17
that ain’t no freudian slip that’s a real low blow
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Comments (4)
Boyufd 25
you might want to end that now buddy before it escalates
xaddrus 17
that ain’t no freudian slip that’s a real low blow
RichardPencil 32
Calm down now. Just because she's fantasizing about this guy while having sex with you doesn't mean that she would certainly **** him given the chance. It's merely a high probability, so relax and keep plowing through those snacks.
Doom_Kitty 14
Once i called my ex boyfriend by a classmates' name because i was thinking of our math homework. Brains can be strange^^ It can mean anything or nothing at all but talking with each other usually solves the problem. Also, depending on how long you're together having a tiny crush on someone isn't neccessarly the end of a relationship. It can happen. We don't turn blind just because we love someone :)