Animals, Dogs, Awkward and Religion: Every dog has its day - FML

Every dog has its day

By bad bad bad bad idea - 28/01/2022 05:01 - United States

Today, I had to very seriously and very slowly explain to my friend why having a bat mitzvah for her dog was a very ignorant and insulting idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 859

You deserved it 182

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/12/2015 18:06 - United States - Kennewick

Today, I told my friend I was considering adopting a dog. She looked at me like I was Satan and went on a rant about how dogs are "born evil" and will always maul someone given the chance. I still have the marks from when one of her psycho cats sliced open my arm last month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 814

You deserved it 1 735

Entitled

By RachelD - 17/07/2021 18:01 - United States

Today, I can’t make it to my friend’s birthday party because my dog died this morning. I called my friend to inform her and she screamed at me because a "dumb animal" is more important than her best friend. Oh, and she asked me if that also means she won’t be getting a present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 440

You deserved it 128

Practice run

By Oops - 18/02/2024 05:00 - United States - Steele

Today, I went to console my cousin because I'd heard that her dog had passed away. As I opened the door, the first thing I saw was her extremely old and feeble (but still very much alive) dog. Turns out my friend was talking about HIS cousin, and I simply misheard. Trying to explain that to her was mighty awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 338

You deserved it 152

Comedian

By WoofWoof - 27/09/2020 14:01 - Pakistan - Islamabad

Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend that getting on all fours and barking at my penis for fun in the center of a mall is extremely inappropriate. She thinks otherwise, and promises to do it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 404

You deserved it 416

By Anonymous - 08/11/2014 17:24 - United States - Newtown

Today, I was at my friend's Bar Mitzvah. After he finished his long-winded speech, I sarcastically did the mockingjay sign from the Hunger Games. It took a couple of seconds before I realized how that looked, and a couple more for me to be shouted down and kicked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 592

You deserved it 34 926

It's a valid lifestyle!

By annoyed - 17/09/2021 08:00 - United States

Today, my friends and I were finally able to meet up for lunch, amidst all of our busy schedules. We had fun talking and catching up about marriage, kids and careers. One friend decided to cause a huge scene though, because apparently we didn’t take her being a stay at home “dog mom” seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 992

You deserved it 139

Checks out

By Asirual - 02/05/2011 18:02 - United States

Today, while handing out business cards to promote my new dog grooming business, I stopped to talk to a potential client. She let me get all the way through my 15-minute speech, before bothering to tell me she didn't have a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 406

You deserved it 13 190

Star Wars

By Not an anti-Semite, just a dumbass - 26/02/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, I somehow mistook the Star of David for a Pentagram. My Jewish friends were not amused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 228

You deserved it 777

Easy mistake to make

By Anonymous - 11/12/2021 19:59 - Germany

Today, I was running down the street after my dog, arms waving and clapping, when my friend said to some curious passers-by, “Oh, never mind that, she’s deaf and has dementia.” From their looks, I don’t think they realized he meant the dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 939

You deserved it 128

Good boy

By This may take awhile - 30/11/2022 05:00 - United States

Today, after a serious argument with my friend about how his dog seems to hate me for no reason, I decided that it's my responsibility to show his dog that I mean no harm. I started off by giving him his favorite treat. He got excited and practically inhaled it… then started barking at me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 702

You deserved it 156

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Friday 28 January 2022 14:30

Your friend is such a dummy. Everyone knows that dogs can't read Hebrew. They can only read English! Hahaha! Besides, dogs don't even like fountain pens!

HokieJ 10

Sunday 30 January 2022 1:47

Might you suggest a bark mitzvah?

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Friday 28 January 2022 14:30

Your friend is such a dummy. Everyone knows that dogs can't read Hebrew. They can only read English! Hahaha! Besides, dogs don't even like fountain pens!

jobekka 20

Friday 28 January 2022 16:45

why? who is she hurting?

Decipherme 11

Friday 28 January 2022 17:07

Ha! Because they actually mean so much👍🏻🤔🤣

kevinwm0 14

Saturday 29 January 2022 21:56

Of course - everyone knows they're only for bats! Seriously though, I'm sorry to hear that he made light of a ceremony that's very important to you, perhaps you could suggest having his cat take communion or sign up for confirmation?

HokieJ 10

Sunday 30 January 2022 1:47

Might you suggest a bark mitzvah?

Keywords

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I agree, your life sucks 1 587

You deserved it 208

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I agree, your life sucks 15 839

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