Work: Dirty old bat - FML

Dirty old bat

By grannysmack - 04/07/2026 06:00 - United States

Today, as I was bent over at my waitressing job, an elderly woman walked by and smacked my ass. I looked at her, shocked, and she said, "It was too tempting with you bent over like that, I have a dirty old mind." I didn't know whether to be flattered or horrified. Maybe both. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 893

You deserved it 6 562

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By Anonymous - 21/09/2019 16:01

Today, at work, an old lady was staring at my crotch a lot. I looked down, thinking maybe I had an open fly. I didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 426

You deserved it 181

By rioght onnn - 20/05/2011 19:38 - Canada

Today, while working at a restaurant, an elderly lady stuck my tip in my back pocket as I was walking away. I wish I knew this before I'd thrown her to the floor for touching my hiney. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 942

You deserved it 43 754

Pervy perv walks

By Cashier - 09/03/2011 05:36 - Canada

Today, I was at work as a grocery store cashier. I felt a hand slap my ass. Turning around I saw an old man winking at me and I screamed. When my manager came to deal with the problem she didn't believe me and gave the man a $25 gift card for "the trouble" I caused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 327

You deserved it 3 806

By Job Seeking - 22/01/2013 11:14 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I was cleaning at work when an elderly gentleman walked towards me, paused, and with a wink said, "That's what I like to see: a girl on her knees." This is the same workplace where another old man informed me that my yellow uniform made me look like a "suggestive cheesecake." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 170

You deserved it 3 010

Thanks a bunch

By nose hurts - 30/12/2012 01:01 - United States - Richmond

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 676

You deserved it 3 503

By Anonymous - 10/01/2011 06:45 - United States

Today, I was working in a restaurant. I stopped to pick up some silverware a customer dropped. Apparently my belt wasn't tight enough because a woman behind me immediately hurled in disgust. On top of being found revolting, I'm now in trouble for "flashing" someone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 491

You deserved it 7 165

Flattered

By Creeped out - 28/01/2013 08:14 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me, "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 224

You deserved it 3 716

Thanks, I guess…

By unsatisfied - 09/03/2009 06:15 - United States

Today, I was working at the grocery store and a very old woman wanted to give me a tip for bagging her groceries. She slid a quarter into my pocket against my thigh as deep down as she could get it, then she gave me a smile and a wink. I was groped by a grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 403

You deserved it 4 441

Nice try

By bigmouth - 02/08/2009 07:35 - United States

Today, I was working as a host at a pasta diner. The hostess I was working with was very attractive and we were flirting quite a bit. A large woman walked in to be seated, and I leaned over to her and dared her to ask the woman if she wanted two chairs. She leaned back and said, "That's my mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 817

You deserved it 76 322

My eyes are up here

By LonelyCashier - 11/07/2019 20:00

Today, an old woman came into my store for help. Towards the end, she asked me my name. I told her while pointing at my name tag. She then replied, "Oh! I didn't notice since I was staring at your boobs. Much prettier to look at." Sadly, this is the first time I've been hit on in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 107

You deserved it 221

Next

Top comments

MaramaBreaksFace 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 16:01

Both, always both.

iowagirl1997 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 16:01

Ohh granny getting it on!!

Comments

gd13343 0

Friday 2 December 2011 4:50

Hahahahhahahahahahahha is all I can say

lovepandorasaver 11

Thursday 29 March 2012 19:31

I wish my grandma was that cool.

elmo_08 0

Thursday 10 May 2012 2:28

Be FLATTERFIED!!! Lol

loltroll667 10

Thursday 20 December 2012 22:31

Be both flattered and horrified, it's an old lady, usually that doesn't happen. All you have to do is change your position.

monner123 3

Monday 7 January 2013 8:15

Horrifyingly flattered.

MissSarcasm01 18

Saturday 21 June 2014 19:06

That's one frisky granny you got there!

SorrowsReward 27

Tuesday 24 November 2015 15:14

Flatterfied?

Aiden89 23

Saturday 30 January 2016 0:23

Sorry OP, that genuinely made me laugh out loud.

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