Today, I lost the key to my bike lock. I ended up having to cut it off, even though it was brand new. After spending 30 minutes hacking away at it, it finally came off. When I hopped onto my bike, I felt something poking my leg. My key was in my pocket the whole time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to bike to work. I normally forget the key to my lock, so I leave it out back and hope that nobody takes it, and nobody does. I finally remembered my lock key so I chained it up. After my 7 hour shift, I walk to the back only to find the lock had been cut, and my bike was gone. FML
Today, I thought I'd locked my house keys in my locker at work. Not having any replacement nearby, I decided to cut the padlock with the saw of my pocket-knife. It took 20 minutes and four cuts into my hand to destroy the padlock. It took another five seconds to find the missing key in my jacket. FML
Today, the key broke inside my lock and I ended up needing bolt cutters. Cool. FML
Today, I biked to the store to buy a new lock, since biking is my only form of transportation. I left my bike unattended for the last time, only to come back with a new chain, but no bike. FML
Today, I left work early, and discovered I was locked out of my house. I subsequently had to use a spoon I found on the ground to smash the bathroom window. I cut my leg on the glass when I climbed through. While inspecting the wound, I felt a lump in my pocket. It was my house key. FML
Today, my bike got stolen because I left my keys in the lock. On my way home, I saw my bike in front of a store, unlocked. I jumped on it, only to get punched in the face by the guy that had taken it, and got it stolen from me again. FML
Today, I spent forty minutes trying to break into my own house after being locked out. After finally getting in through a small unlocked window, I discovered my keys in my pants pocket. FML
Today, I rode my bike to the store because I only had a few things to pick up. When I walked back out after five minutes, my bike was stolen. I had gone to the store to buy a new bike lock. FML
Today, I rode my brand new shiny bicycle to work for the first time. I didn’t have time to figure out how my new lock worked, so I changed the 0000 code to some combination just to find it locked as I came back. After watching a tutorial and trying for 30 minutes, I just cracked it with pliers. FML
Today, I came home from work to find the lock to my bike busted and my bike stolen. The worst part was a nicer bike was sitting right next to it without a lock. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Kers3054 16
YDI. Why was that not the first place you looked?
jwill200 16
YDI. I agree with #1, that seems like a really obvious place to look before getting a saw and destroying the lock
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (36)
deathrise007 22
I moderated this. After reading it was thinking, "OP is an idiot and he deserves it, why not let the whole FML community know?" *clicks yes*
deathrise007 22
I moderated this. I finished reading it and thought, "OP is an idiot and deserves it. Why not let the FML community know as well?" *clicks yes*
mattyiscool123 26
Yeah those keys are so good at hiding inside pockets
Mpii 11
Why and how were you able to cut it open on the spot? And wouldn't it have made more sence to assume you had simply misplaced the key. You'd then search for the key instead of thinking it was forever gone. YDI
jackler92 16
Anyone red think someone was gonna call him out and think he was stealing it
Genos115 15
It must be hard being that damn stupid.
Switchback22 2
Dumbfuck
fictionaldiary 11
Bike locks are like... $20.