Today, I realized that my dog is an evil genius. As I sat down to have a snack, he barked as if he saw someone outside. I went to check it out, but nobody was there. When I returned, I found my dog on the table finishing off my bacon sandwich. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my dog climbed onto the dining room table to eat the cat's food. Then whined until I showed him how to get down. He does this every night. My dog is a genius. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park. While chatting with another dog owner, my dog managed to steal their sandwich and ran off with it. I had to chase my sandwich-thieving dog through the entire park. FML
Today, I went home for lunch. Upon opening the door, I smelled something horrid. My dog had opened his cage, eaten all the dog treats, and had diarrhea all over my bed and bedroom floor. FML
Today, my dog is mad at me due to the fact that earlier in the day I ate 2 peanut butter cookies. Apparently, they were his dog treats. I had no idea. FML
Today, I came home to find my dog had learned how to open our fridge. He ate the birthday cake I was saving for a friend's surprise party, and to add insult to injury, he'd also apparently thrown the barely digested cake up all over my bed. FML
Today, I tried to sneak some cookies out of the pantry without my dog noticing. I dropped one, and now he thinks that every time I open the pantry, it’s snack time. He won’t stop barking at it. FML
Today, I found out my dog can open the fridge. Now I have no food left. FML
Today, I came home to find that my dog had figured out how to open the fridge again. He'd helped himself to raw eggs and crab. FML
Today, I was cooking bacon while my dog watched me, drooling. I thought this was funny and I teased her a bit. I then slipped in the drool as I was carrying the bacon and she got to enjoy it. FML
Today, a dog came into my yard. I bent down to pet him, forgetting I had a burger in my hand. The dog grabbed it and ran. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 39
That doesn't make him a genius. He's just smarter than you.
Denny1 15
Good boy
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Comments (89)
pistolpete31000 7
Mans best friend. And a true best friend would probably trick you into something like that as well
natheitz 23
Are you sure someone didn't just pass by outside and was gone by the time you got there?
Dometal 1
Clever.
jennababe98 9
No one can resist Bacon. Not even dogs.
skyeyez9 24
My dog did this, but it was with a poptart.
nachosbabygurl 9
I would have thrown my dog out of the house and not let him back in for a week
Simbaby 23
I think it's cute because an animal done it(:
worldclassrager 39
Criminal mastermind...it was the bacon not surprised...
perdix 29
I was going to agree to the "genius" designation until I got to the end of the story. It's bacon, for God's sake, that makes your dog a bit more clever than average.
tman1985 9
4-legged troll