The Top

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Get this shit away from me

By Tipped off - 18/06/2025 22:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I ordered sushi for dinner. When it arrived, I realized the delivery driver had given me the wrong order, a family-sized vegan lasagna. I don’t even like regular lasagna, let alone vegan lasagna. FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 98

Sharing is caring

By Lost Reggie - 02/07/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, my generosity towards friends, family, artists, Patreon, and Twitch streamers has left me on the brink of financial instability. I was counting on ROI to keep helping others, but now I need to set firm boundaries. FML

I agree, your life sucks 99

You deserved it 742

Windy

By Not Marilyn - 12/07/2025 03:00 - United States - Dallas

Today, I was walking into work when a gust of wind blew my skirt completely over my head in front of a group of tourists taking pictures of the building. Now I'm afraid that somewhere out there is a photo of me flashing my polka-dot underwear like a knock-off Marilyn Monroe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 105

Wildlife

By Anonymous - 13/07/2025 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I arrived at a campsite, got everything set up, and went for a shower. However, when I got back, a drunken rhino of a woman had crawled into my tent, been sick, then passed out on my freshly-washed bedding. She was so fat I couldn’t even roll her. I had to sleep in my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 577

You deserved it 85

Heated gaming moment

By Anonymous - 09/08/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, I got a call from my son's friend's dad, demanding I pick him up immediately. When I arrived, he marched me into the house and pointed at an Xbox controller lodged in the wall, informing me I'd be receiving the bill for drywall repair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 216

That's a bad look

By Mortified - 30/08/2025 22:00 - United Kingdom - Exeter

Today, I renamed my home Wi-Fi to “PleaseTalkToMeSarah” to hint to my crush/neighbour. Later, I realized the whole apartment building could see it, and had worked out who it belonged to. Now strangers keep asking if Sarah had talked to me yet. She hasn’t. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81

You deserved it 771

Secret life

By AKdogowner - 03/09/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been sexting several other girls from Reddit for over a year. While we were at his parent’s house for dinner. Last year I found out he was on drugs for the first year we dated. This was all as I was in the process of feeding my dying dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 116

Bad year

By Anonymous - 12/10/2025 12:00

Today, after a shitty year in which I got pregnant, a miscarriage happened, then my boyfriend turned into more of asshole, which I thought it was part of the miscarriage so I stayed with him, but he kept blaming me so I broke up with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 455

You deserved it 139

Dominatrix

By Grudges - 01/11/2025 20:00

Spicy

Today, I found an odd notebook in my wife's desk and opened it. I learned why our sex life has gotten so boring: every time I upset her, she secretly bans something sexual. For instance: "June 16th - dented car - no more lingerie" or "August 9th - forgot wallet on date night - no more rope play." FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 140

What should I do?

By Taylor Montgomery - 14/11/2025 03:00

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of 11 years is cheating on me. I’m so numb, I don’t even know what to do. We just bought a house together last year, and we have a dog I’m not willing to let go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 455

You deserved it 100

Acquired taste

By Anonymous - 05/12/2025 12:00

Today, my daughter said she wanted to be vegetarian like me. Beaming with pride, I made her plant-based burgers for dinner. She took one bite, screamed, "EW!" and started crying and begging for beef burgers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 146

You deserved it 481

Sia is drunk again

By Not Sia - 21/12/2025 09:00

Today, during a wild party, I climbed up to the second floor, over a railing, and leapt for the chandelier, screaming, "I'M GONNA SWING FROM THE CHANDELIER!" I swung for a second, everyone was cheering, and then the chandelier gave way. Now I'm in hospital with millions of stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52

You deserved it 1 003

Bulked up

By Angie - 06/01/2026 09:00

Today, my mother-in-law invited herself to my house to cook lunch. I'm postpartum, depressed, and nursing a two-week old. She fed me four small shrimp and a handful of macaroni. This is what I'll be eating for a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 79

Gullible's travels

By YouveGotFraud - 09/01/2026 22:00

Today, I was house-sitting. A lady came to the door and demanded to know whose white car was in the drive. It was mine. She said she had video proof of me hitting her mailbox. I panicked, asked how much it was. She said $200. Later I checked my car. No damage. Impossible angle. I gave $200 to a strange old lady. With no proof. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77

You deserved it 793

OK then…

By Renee - 25/01/2026 22:00

Today, I’m hard of hearing and rely partly on lip-reading. At a grocery store, the cashier asked me something I didn’t quite catch, so I smiled and nodded. Apparently, she had asked if I wanted to donate to a charity, so I ended up donating a couple of bucks to a cause I still don’t know the name of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 373

You deserved it 199

Not a bio major

By Podcast bros must be stopped! - 31/01/2026 03:00

Today, I had a client argue that he shouldn’t have to pay the full amount of court ordered child support because the kids aren’t “fully his”. He swears that when a woman has multiple partners, trace amounts of DNA are left in the womb, creating kids with several fathers. Yes he was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 458

You deserved it 71

Help needed!

By HUH? - 12/02/2026 15:00

Spicy

Today, my wife snapped at me for never having sex with her. Any time I try, she tells me to stop, but apparently sometimes she wants me to ignore her pleas and keep going. Sometimes she actually wants me to stop, though, and she won't tell me how to differentiate the two. Help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 91

Love is…

By Anonymous - 21/02/2026 15:00

Today, my husband called me into the bathroom to wipe his ass, as he's become too fat to do it himself. I don't know what's sadder, the fact that I did it or the fact that I miss when he was at least ashamed to ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 155

Step-dad no more

By Anonymous - 07/03/2026 20:00

Today, my wife of 9 years told me she wants a divorce all because I refuse to legally adopt her kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 204

You deserved it 536

Mistaken identity

By Crushed - 09/03/2026 15:00

Today, I saw a man at the gym glancing at me. I went over and said, "Are you ogling me?" kind of low key flirtatiously. He said, "No, I'm working out. Don't flatter yourself." FML

I agree, your life sucks 78

You deserved it 654

Gimme my money

By PrettyGirlCrookedMouth - 27/03/2026 09:00

Today, someone was sent to our house to fix our broken garage door. Mom asked me to pay for it, telling me she'd pay me back this weekend. It was supposed to be about $300 and some change. The door was so broken, it ended up costing $1000, cleaning out my whole savings account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 63

Love is hell

By Anonymous - 29/03/2026 03:00

Today, after my long distance "boyfriend" told me he loved me more than the world, he asked for advice on how to talk to girls. He already has a girl from class in mind. What's worse is that I actually haven't broken up with him yet because I know about his home life. I can't help but feel like I wasted my time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 129

You deserved it 373

Boredom

By Anonymous - 03/04/2026 12:00

Today, I'm still unemployed after almost a year because my last job couldn't transfer me when my wife and I had to move due to her job. I can't even find something like grocery store or fast food. Seriously beginning to resent her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 337

You deserved it 198

Over my dead body

By Anonymous - 06/04/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I prevented my brother from attending our sister's funeral, since they hated each other and she didn't want him there, in accordance with her wishes. Now the whole family hates me and say that I should have let him in and that sometimes, you have to go against someone's wishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 495

You deserved it 131

It's not a phase… or maybe it is

By Anonymous - 07/05/2026 06:00 - United States

Today, we found out my niece has been faking all her issues in order to keep up her “damaged, beautiful disaster” online persona. She went too far and ended up on a 72hr hold. Now she’s screaming, crying, and begging to come home because the hospital is “too scary.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 366

You deserved it 91

Bass players unite

By Anonymous - 01/06/2026 11:00 - United Kingdom - Northolt

Today, it's been a year since I graduated high school and nobody, not even my own friends, has hit me up since then. I may as well be dead to them. I was in a band, but I'm now realising they only pretended to be nice to me since I was the only person in the school who knew how to play bass. I haven't talked to a soul other than my family and myself since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 233

You deserved it 68

Trip of a lifetime

By Just got friendzoned - 24/06/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, on a vacation with my best friend who I’m secretly in love with, I was dressed to the nines, and felt confident and upbeat about myself. Not once has he made a move on me the entire time, not even in the hotel room we both shared. At the end of the trip he told me I’m “such a great friend.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 140

You deserved it 703

SPEECH! SPEECH!

By Trevone87 - 26/07/2025 15:00 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I was asked to give a toast at my best friend’s wedding. I confidently walked up, tapped my glass, and began with, “Marriage is like...” Then I completely blanked, for about 10 seconds, but it felt like hours. I finished with, “...good luck!” and sat down to slow, confused golf claps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 209

You deserved it 309

Let me speak to a human!

By Yudith - 28/07/2025 00:22 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I ordered a set of chairs on Amazon for my work. The confirmation code they were sending didn't show up on my phone or email. Two hours and countless chats with customer service bots later, when I got to speak with a human, the confirmation codes showed up. I still cannot order the chairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 647

You deserved it 194

Yudith tells us more.

Yudith 25

Sunday 27 July 2025 13:29

Update: after creating a business account only to be able to order the damn chairs and ordering again, the system somehow took my personal credit card to complete the transaction, then cancelled it just because. I still cannot order the chairs. Will try again on Monday.

HR sucks

By Anonymous - 23/08/2025 16:00 - United States - Akron

Today, HR informed me that they would not be investigating my formal complaint against my boss. This after four months of relentless bullying, including calling me while I was on vacation to tell me to do work, and eliminating my position when she found out I had gone to HR. FML

I agree, your life sucks 505

You deserved it 76

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The Top

The Top

Today, the elevator in my apartment building broke down. I live on the 30th floor and am still climbing the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 246

You deserved it 4 397

Today, in an attempt to spice up our relationship, I tied my boyfriend up and did a striptease for him. I pulled my skirt down over my heels but tripped as I tried to step out of it. Not only did I pull a muscle in my leg but I elbowed him in the groin. So much for spice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 769

You deserved it 9 204

Today, at the age of 22, I started eating my boogers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 574

You deserved it 49 414

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 915

You deserved it 4 126

Today, my boss gave me attitude for not going to back to work this Friday. I'm a massage therapist and where I live, it's currently illegal to practice during the pandemic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 731

You deserved it 193

Today, my girlfriend hasn’t fucked me in god knows how long. I had to mention a BJ and she already said she was going to give me one for Valentine’s Day. I knew it was bullshit because it’s the 17th and still no head. I get mad when I watch sex scenes. I masturbate but it's not the same. I really wanna fuck other women. IDK WHAT TO DO. FML

I agree, your life sucks 319

You deserved it 528