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Invaded

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2020 but it's good stuff

Today, I put solar lights in my yard to finally figure out what my dog has been chasing over the fence at night. It's rats. She's been chasing rats that have invaded my backyard every night for a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 558

You deserved it 203

BYOKA

By Anonymous - 06/06/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I’m so embarrassed I can barely believe it: I was out on a date and he asked the waitress to bring a pitcher of water and extra sugar packets. He took two Kool-Aid packets from his pocket and mixed it up right there at the table, proudly stating he didn’t need to pay for drinks now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 426

You deserved it 96

Unhinged

By Marcus - 02/06/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, the girl who said we were “just friends” had a meltdown when I told her I went on a date with a girl I met on Hinge. She literally told me two months ago after me giving her the shirt off my back and being her emotional support anchor for nearly four years that we were “just friends.” So what’s the deal? FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 53

Just a dream…

By alaska - 30/05/2026 03:00 - United States - Aurora

Today, I had a dream that my mom hugged me and told me she loved me. I woke up to her banging on my door, barging into my room, inspecting it, and then telling me to “just fucking kill yourself, because you're genuinely a bad person” before slamming my door. My room was perfectly clean and tidy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 591

You deserved it 70

Careful

By wowawesome - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I got a second piercing in my ear. I needed help cleaning the back, so I asked my dad for help. I told him to careful, but right when I did, he tore the earring out with the cotton swab. Thanks, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 771

You deserved it 458

Are you kidding me?

By Anonymous - 06/06/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my soon-to-be ex-husband cheated on me with a woman and got her pregnant (we are both men). What's even worse is that not many of my family are supporting me and keep making excuses for him, like maybe he wants to be a dad, or maybe he's bisexual. People are even encouraging me to stay with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 471

You deserved it 136

You were loved

By Anonymous - 08/06/2026 09:00 - United States - Moline

Today, my boyfriend and I spent almost $500 adopting a senior cat and buying everything we needed to take care of him. He died 6 hours later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 472

You deserved it 93

Curiousity killed the radio star

By Ash - 30/05/2026 09:00 - Belgium - Lier

Today, my friend didn't believe me when I was bragging about how good of a boyfriend my partner finally was. She told me to prove it because he had cheated before. I opened his Instagram and the first DM opened was him cheating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 318

You deserved it 262

Overcrowded

By Anonymous - 01/06/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, my marriage of only a month is falling apart because my wife is furious that I allowed my daughter to move in with my mother, who lives just a few houses down. My daughter wanted to go live with her grandma and I agreed because my wife brought in four kids and my daughter had virtually no space. FML

I agree, your life sucks 479

You deserved it 196

Crushed

By Anonymous - 17/06/2026 03:00 - Portugal

Today, I have an office crush that I'm completely in love with. I tried to make some type of connection, but to him I'm dead, I'm just like some kind of office furniture, like a lamp or a printer, but even more useless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 314

Here comes the bride…

By Anonymous - 05/06/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I realized that I may have made a mistake in getting married, because he kept telling people to "Stop fucking crying, it's not a funeral." FML

I agree, your life sucks 301

You deserved it 120

It's a sign

By Anonymous - 08/06/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, after weeks of psyching myself up, I finally asked my crush to go out for coffee. She smiled and said yes. Feeling on top of the world, I turned to leave, walked straight into an opening glass door, and gave myself a nosebleed before the date had even happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 361

You deserved it 106

You're ruining everything

By Anonymous - 24/06/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I hate what my beloved Renaissance Faires have become. Hardly anyone dresses in period-accurate garb anymore. Everything is all dumb mushrooms, slutty “fairies”, and pirates. None of which existed in the time period we’re supposed to be in. Nothing authentic at all! FML

I agree, your life sucks 319

You deserved it 237

LonelyFans

By whyyy - 01/06/2026 09:00 - Netherlands

Today, it's been two years since I dropped out of college to do OnlyFans and get rich. I've made less than a thousand on OnlyFans and have to support myself with two jobs, and no man will have me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133

You deserved it 604

Can't win

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, my supervisor told me off for doing something. When I reminded her that she told me to do it, she yelled at me for correcting her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 671

You deserved it 217

Bass players unite

By Anonymous - 01/06/2026 12:00 - United Kingdom - Northolt

Today, it's been a year since I graduated high school and nobody, not even my own friends, has hit me up since then. I may as well be dead to them. I was in a band, but I'm now realising they only pretended to be nice to me since I was the only person in the school who knew how to play bass. I haven't talked to a soul other than my family and myself since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 238

You deserved it 68

No good deed and all that

By Jimmy - 14/06/2026 00:00 - Canada - Windsor

Today, I found a wallet on the sidewalk and spent an hour tracking down the owner. When I finally returned it, he opened it, counted the cash in front of me, and asked if I was sure there hadn't been more money in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 422

You deserved it 69

Snitches get stiches

By Anonymous - 30/05/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, my so-called son told me that I'm never going to see my grandchildren again because I caught him cheating on his wife (in MY home and in MY bed!) and ratted him out to her so now they're getting a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 83

Homeowners war

By xXCharlieXx - 03/06/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my neighborhood Facebook group was arguing about whether leaf blowers should be banned. Thinking I was posting in a private chat, I wrote, “Imagine making leaf blowers your entire personality.” I accidentally posted it publicly. Two neighbors haven't spoken to me since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 186

You deserved it 376

Weirdest gang ever

By Anonymous - 05/06/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was stopped from jogging by a group of joggers who said they’re a paid membership group from a HOA so I can’t run near them unless I’m also a member. When I rightfully told them to tongue kiss my asshole, they joined hands across the street and the road to stop me from running past them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 511

You deserved it 63

Donut scandal

By Not a Kevin here - 10/06/2026 15:00 - Philippines

Today, in the doughnut shop I usually go to, I bought 3 dozen to take home. A new clerk rang me up and, with an attitude, said the store is cashless only now. Despite me showing cash to pay with like I always do, I was judged by other customers as if I was a deadbeat. She then threw a fit for cancelling and returning the items. FML

I agree, your life sucks 357

You deserved it 88

Cyrano

By Anonymous - 12/06/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my friends fancy each other and keep secretly asking me to write their sext messages. I'm essentially carrying on both sides of their sexy talk with myself, only I won’t be the one getting laid. Sometimes wish I was lesbian too, arranging a threesome between us would be easier than this FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 261

Culinary experience

By Jenny - 17/06/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, I went on a date with a guy. I looked at the menu and yelled, "Who puts caramel on onions? EW!" I then learned that "caramelized onion" is not caramel covered onions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 726

I hope not

By Sarah - 24/06/2026 20:00 - United States - The Bronx

Today, I pooped my pants for the first time, ever. At least since I was a baby. I just turned 38; is this what getting older looks like? FML

I agree, your life sucks 306

You deserved it 76

Tipping culture wars

By Anonymous - 03/06/2026 20:00 - United States - Dallas

Today, during a first date, we discovered we had complete opposite views on tipping. Neither of us wanted to back down, so we spent an hour debating economics instead of getting to know each other. At the end, the server thanked us for the entertainment and asked if we'd be coming back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 399

Check where you sit

By Anonymous - 10/06/2026 20:00 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, I went to the bathroom after my 9 year-old nephew. Apparently nobody taught him to lift the seat when he pees, or how to aim properly, because when I sat down, I sat in his pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 283

You deserved it 280

Extra NSFW

By WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK - 31/05/2026 03:00 - United States - New York

Today, my girlfriend told me how she got the scars on her legs. I'd assumed they were self-harm scars. Nope, apparently getting sliced up turns her on, and if I want a good sex life, I'd better get used to cutting her thighs with a razor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 391

You deserved it 107

How could you?

By Anonymous - 07/06/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, my wife called me at work, screaming in rage that she hated me, that I was a useless lump, that she wishes we'd never met. Did I have an affair or burn the house down? Nope. I set up the kids' backpacks for school today and forgot a library book that was due today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 466

You deserved it 89

Doggy bag psycho

By Monalisa - 04/06/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, my husband and I were having an argument over accidentally leaving a to-go container of leftovers at a restaurant. He asked me why I didn’t remind him and I said that I forgot. He asked me, “What if you forgot to breathe one day? You’d die.” Then he kicked me out of the car and told me to walk home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 575

You deserved it 95

Rubbing it in

By Ugly fat and old - 12/06/2026 20:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, after seven months apart, I agreed to meet with my ex, wondering if he'd changed. He sure did. He lost a ton of weight and picked up several new hobbies. He also picked up a 23 year-old new girlfriend. She's slimmer and prettier than I'll ever be. I threw my drink in his face and left in tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 106

You deserved it 600

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The Top

Today, I accidentally asked the cashier at Wendy's how much their 99 cent chicken nuggets were. I guess he is still laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 006

You deserved it 21 125

Today, my girlfriend of nine months made a huge scene in public, calling me a "cheating bastard" because she saw me with another woman at the library. That "other woman" is my Calculus tutor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 615

You deserved it 3 514

Today, my girlfriend started a huge fight with me over how I don't have the right to have close female friends anymore. She ended up storming off, and won't return my calls. But no worries: she did just play the word "murder" in our game of Words With Friends. Very comforting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 437

You deserved it 3 785

Today, I was at the mall with my little brother. I saw him touching some expensive objects, so I slapped his arm. I noticed he wasn't my brother when he started crying and his real mom slapped me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 490

You deserved it 56 361

Today, while my fiancé was showing me the finger guard on his brand new, very sharp knife, he managed to slice his finger open and throw the knife onto my leg, cutting me also. There's now a nice trail of blood on the carpet all the way to the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 342

You deserved it 305

Today, my husband and I recently decided not to have kids, because neither of us like children. Learning this, my dad wrote me out of his will and my mother swore on the Bible in church that she’s never going to speak to me again until I obey God's word and start multiplying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 470

You deserved it 296