kids

I'm the father who stepped up

By Anonymous - 02/06/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, my parents started nagging me yet again to have kids. When I pointed out that I already do, they scoffed and said that my five step-kids don't count. FML

I agree, your life sucks 388

You deserved it 78

Foul language

By Anonymous - 02/06/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, my whole family ganged up on me because I called my 9-year-old niece a cunt. The little brat purposely ruined my son's final science project for school and caused him to get a zero, even though we wrote a note to the teacher explaining what happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 346

You deserved it 117

Overcrowded

By Anonymous - 01/06/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, my marriage of only a month is falling apart because my wife is furious that I allowed my daughter to move in with my mother, who lives just a few houses down. My daughter wanted to go live with her grandma and I agreed because my wife brought in four kids and my daughter had virtually no space. FML

I agree, your life sucks 479

You deserved it 196

I'm the father who stepped up

By Anonymous - 31/05/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, in the aftermath of our breakup, I asked my ex-fiancee if I could still be part of her sons' lives since I've been basically a father to them for almost 12 years. She told me to fuck off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 470

You deserved it 141

Sorry sweetie

By Anonymous - 30/05/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, I admitted to my best friend that I was having second thoughts about getting married and was probably going to break up with him. Unfortunately, my fiance's daughter, who I absolutely adore, overheard the conversation and threw a huge screaming tantrum asking why I didn't want to be her mommy anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 120

You deserved it 565

NO HITTING

By jimma - 29/05/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, my wife and I had a huge fight that ended with her taking my son and going to her mother's. What happened? I caught him playing with the knobs on the GAS STOVE for the third time and spanked him for it. He's been told not to play with those many times already, and I'm scared he's gonna start a fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 437

You deserved it 183

Tight family unit

By Empathylevel0 - 29/05/2026 03:00 - Denmark

Today, after months of couple's therapy for a lack of empathy, I'm up for an operation in the butt, so I asked if he could take two days off work in the days following. He said no and suggested the first week of July. The second week of July I'll be going with our three children to a family sports camp for a week. Alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 84

Safety first

By Anonymous - 29/05/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, my parents had my little sister's birthday pool party at our house. My mom decided to tell all the guests that the pool was "just for decoration" and nobody would actually be allowed to swim in it. Cue a million screaming tantrums and my parents and even me receiving tons of hate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 387

You deserved it 113

Mom of the year

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, my mother sat me down and told me, "I'm not going to lie, I hate living with you. Please get a job and move out." I'm 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 500

You deserved it 313

Wouldn't you?

By Anonymous - 28/05/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my son (17) lied about not being able to get the time off from his job for our family vacation and has been partying and screwing his girlfriend while we're thousands of miles away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 494

Make it a double feature

By Anonymous - 27/05/2026 12:00 - United States - San Bernardino

Today, my husband declared that since our youngest son happened to be born on our anniversary, we no longer needed to celebrate. He reasoned that it would be “wrong” to make his special day about us. Truth is he’s just a cheap unromantic sod. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 107

No kidding

By Minding my own biz - 26/05/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, at brunch, a friend started talking about wanting kids. The table immediately turned into a debate about whether having children is selfish, noble, irresponsible, or “bad for the planet.” The waiter came back 3 times asking if we were ready to order, while 8 adults argued over the future of humanity next to untouched eggs Benedict. FML

I agree, your life sucks 283

You deserved it 132

You had to ask

By hii - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was babysitting a one year-old. She'd just learned how to say yes, so if you asked her ANYTHING, she'd say yes. I asked her if she liked vegetables and she said, "Yes!" Then I asked her if I was pretty. She looked at me and said, "NO." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 814

You deserved it 14 809

Toxic

By Anonymous - 25/05/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, thanks to grandparent rights, I have to allow my toxic mother, who forced me into beauty pageants when I was a kid, to visit my kids. I hate her so much but I don't have a choice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 428

You deserved it 71

Fine, stay there!

By Anonymous - 24/05/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, my punishment for my 14 year-old troublemaker son seems to have badly backfired. My husband and I sent him to live with my strict disciplinarian father for a while, and not only has he changed, but he loves it there and refuses to come home. My dad is on his side. I don't know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 562

Should've gone to KFC instead

By Anonymous - 24/05/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my ex had the bright idea of trying to bond with our son by taking him to a UFC fight. Our son is only 8 and autistic. It’s been hours and he hasn’t stopped crying about the "big scary men that kept hurting each other." FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 96

Dementia?

By Anonymous - 24/05/2026 00:00 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, my dad called me a pussy and said I wasn't a real man, simply because I hugged and kissed my son and told him that I loved him. It gets even better though. My dad was openly affectionate and loving to me when I was a kid, then somewhere along the line, he became this horrible person. Can't go no contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 71

In this economy??

By Anonymous - 23/05/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my wife and I have been fighting, and she's threatening divorce. Why? Because I don't want to have a second kid. We cannot afford another one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 405

You deserved it 74

This is us

By Anonymous - 23/05/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, CPS came to my door because they found out that I didn't report it when my sister abandoned her kids on my doorstep. They're telling me that I'm going to have to take them down to the foster care center and go through the proper channels if I want to keep them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 464

You deserved it 84

Time waster

By Anonymous - 22/05/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, my wife reported our neighbor for leaving her son home alone while she works during the day. Her son is 13 years-old. I am so completely embarrassed and my wife keeps justifying what she did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 458

You deserved it 81

Bad grandma

By Anonymous - 21/05/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, I'm grounded for literally the whole summer because my parents found out that I was still seeing my grandma behind their backs, even though they banned her from ever seeing us again after she spanked my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 128

I can't get behind that

By Anonymous - 20/05/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, my whole family turned on me because I absolutely refused to attend my son's wedding, even though he really wanted me to walk him down the aisle. He married the woman he cheated on his ex-wife with, and abandoned their kids. That's why I refused to attend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 563

You deserved it 84

Cut off

By Anonymous - 19/05/2026 12:00 - United States - Irving

Today, my former sister-in-law, who I was once so close to, said that we can't be friends or anything like that anymore because now that she's divorced from my cheating asshole brother, it's too painful for her to be around our family, even for the sake of my kids. I hate him so much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 443

You deserved it 57

For science!

By Science101 - 19/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, my nephew asked me to help build his science fair volcano. I got too invested in making it realistic and used way too much baking soda and vinegar. The eruption shot across the kitchen, hit the ceiling, and dripped red food coloring down the walls while my sister stared at me in annoyed shock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89

You deserved it 347

Shambles

By Biancap - 18/05/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, I found out my husband isn’t the biological father of our daughter when we consulted about the bone marrow transplant formula she needs for her leukemia. I don’t know who the real father is because I had a drunken one-night stand at a friend’s birthday party. My marriage and daughter’s life is in shambles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90

You deserved it 964

Ya winning, son?

By What the fuck, son? - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Netherlands - Amerongen

Today, I walked in on my son trying to carve a bong out of a watermelon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 680

You deserved it 7 923

Just shut up already!

By Anonymous - 18/05/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, my sister went from choosing not to have kids because they just aren’t for her to being obnoxiously childfree. We can’t have a single conversation without her ranting about how much she hates children, and parents are pathetic losers. I have three kids and don’t want her around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 92

Manipulation demon

By Cal - 18/05/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I convinced my daughter to tell my wife that the coworker she’s been getting a bit too close to lately touched her inappropriately so she’d stop interacting with him. After arguing and confrontation between the four of us, my daughter threw me under the bus and told them the truth. Now they’re all mad at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67

You deserved it 1 095

Can't cope

By Anonymous - 18/05/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, all of my friends and family have ostracized me, and no one is willing to talk to me about anything, because I gave my baby up for adoption after my husband died. Nobody understands that I'm not cut out to be a single mom. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 547

You deserved it 266

Mix up

By Anonymous - 17/05/2026 15:00 - Canada - Windsor

Today, my friend, her husband, their baby and I went to a baseball game. The lady next to us asked if her and his kid was mine and her husband's kids. She's 5 years older than me and a different race. FML

I agree, your life sucks 261

You deserved it 71

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Poopoo peepee Psychology Work Mental health Cheating Kids Drunk Embarrassing Love Weddings Singing Health Sports Furniture Airplanes Awkward Transportation Smartphone Grandparents Photography Annoying Relatable Job interview Proposal My ex Social Media Weird Introverts Parents

The Top

Today, my cat managed to digest some of the grass she ate. This makes her poop come out daisy-chained, and sometimes leaves a piece dangling from her ass on a string of grass. Then she runs around like crazy until it falls off, if possible on my bed. I had to catch her and pull it out by hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 082

You deserved it 2 378

Today, when I woke up, I noticed something crawling on my bed. A white faced wasp was dragging the corpse of a rather large spider. I'm not sure what I was more disturbed about; the fact that the wasp was dragging something twice its size, or that these bugs even live in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 554

You deserved it 2 217

Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 652

You deserved it 3 984

Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend, "Actually, it's a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 591

You deserved it 4 529

Today, I saw a Tesla truck in my rear-view mirror and thought, "Oh, look how cool the front looks!" Five seconds later it rear-ended me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 200

Today, I went to my first spin class. Trying my best, I hopped on the bike and started pedaling like I’d been doing it for years. The instructor came over, adjusted the seat, and as soon as she let go, I completely lost my balance and tipped over. The bike fell sideways, taking me and two water bottles with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 135