Today, after weeks of practice, I proudly did 9 chin-ups on my chin-up bar. As soon as I was done, my 11-year-old daughter came over and banged out 12 of them. Then she wiped her sweaty hands off and did 8 more. Then she gave me pointers on my technique. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Out of the mouth of babes...
Today, while I was getting ready for the day, my 5-year-old daughter looked at me and said, "Mom, maybe you should do some gymnastics today. Your legs look bigger." FML
Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML
Rise
Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML
Today, I told my dad I was going to the gym. He stood up and clapped. FML
Today, we finished a sit-up test at school. I had been training for the athletic tests, so I was proud of my score. When someone asked what I got and I shared, proud, they responded with, "I bet it helps that your fat bounces you back up." FML
Wax on, wax off
Today, after 10 years of intense training, I earned a black belt in karate. When I told my mom, she asked how long it took me, then laughed and sarcastically remarked, "Wow. SO impressive," whilst slow-clapping. FML
Cool
Today, at the gym, I was trying to look cool doing pull-ups in front of someone I liked. On my first pull-up, my hand slipped, and I fell backwards onto a yoga ball, which shot me straight into another guy doing push-ups. FML
Kids are gross
Today, I taught my 18 month-old daughter to wipe the green, snotty mucus from under her nose with a tissue. To which, like a ninja, she then wiped my open-mouthed upper lip with that same snotty tissue. FML
Today, my daughter went potty. Just as she always does, she came up to me and announced, "I flushed, and wiped, and shut the light off." Then she did something brand new. She covered my face with her hand and asked, "Do these fingers smell?" They did. FML
Today, I was finishing my chest workout at the gym when this really cute girl started using the machine next to me. To impress her, I tried lifting a lot of weight on the barbell. It ended up landing on my neck and she had to help me get it off. FML
Top comments
zandalee 20
Damn. Kids. Keeping it real since 1873.
Imhere4fml 24
Well she does have years of practice on those monkey bars compared to your few weeks... Don't feel to bad OP.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (126)
zandalee 20
Damn. Kids. Keeping it real since 1873.
boofgall 16
Way to blow first comment, make a joke nobody will get. OP it's easier for a little girl to pull her own weight than a full adults, don't feel ashamed.
cheertrombonist 9
"way to" be a bitch
ittsdann 6
Both of you seem butthurt.
cheertrombonist 9
I'm actually recovering from a cystectomy done on my tailbone on friday, so yeah.... Extreme butthurt :( BUTT HOW DID YOU KNOW?
laden_swallow09 35
I know I didn't get 1's alleged joke. I take it 24 understood the reference, though.
TheAbstract 15
It seems to me that 39 nobodies got it, or at least appreciated it.
Bladeofarzeal 6
Oohhhh :( I know how that feels, I had to undergo it twice.. Shit is painful as hell.. Good luck on recovering!
cheertrombonist 9
thanks man!
Irakli_1 27
More exercise maybe? :D
Cashtangoteam 10
Well the daughter probably weighs like 80 pounds, so it's easier for her to do chin ups than it is for a full grown man.
mudkipsan 19
#17 is absolutely right. She only has to lift up a child. You have to lift up a whole adult. Besides that, there's always going to be people who perform better than you - improving yourself isn't about them. That being said, don't sell your daughter short as a "weak little girl". What expectations for herself do you think you're setting up with that kind of talk?
saksxalmo 20
I agree with this comment so hard.
etchsanity1 11
Pull ups are about percentage of body weight her muscles couldn't pull up a 200lb dude sure but they also couldn't walk as one or anything else... Relative to her dad she's in better shape but she's also young and active.
Lant 6
None of my friends cant even do one and we are all 21, 20 so i have respect for him just for doing what he did
easyprey 8
Simple solution, move the bar higher so she can't reach it.
BlueFlatts 20
That's sad if you can't do one at the age of 20, unless you and all of your friends have some un-controllable health issues. Unlikely.
geko911 22
All those people saying she only has a little girls weight to pull up instead of a full grown mans, she also has the muscles of a little girl. If this FML is true, that little girl is something else.
Hamz1989 13
I'm sorry OP, but this is a wake up call and for you to get encouraged to do better. Listen to your daughter.
LouisianaBob 9
He did say this was after weeks of practice so he's already decided to get up and get active.
STACEKING 4
Take them.
BlowinChronic 18
What?
Crazynopantsman 11
He means that he should take the pointers his daughter gave him #41.
Imhere4fml 24
Well she does have years of practice on those monkey bars compared to your few weeks... Don't feel to bad OP.
oj101 33
Also, adults are a lot heavier and are more in proportion whereas children can more easily do it due to long arms and a high centre of gravity.
kwyk 23
I would've thought short arms would help for pull ups. It's simply strength:weight ratio. I remember being able to pump out the pull ups when I was a child also, and I can tell you that it's much harder now. And I'm probably more active now than then. Anyway, 9 isn't too bad at all OP.
mikuxxhatsune 32
That is true, I could easily do chin ups when I was much younger, around 9 or so. Now I can barely do one...
beauxbeau 11
It's okay OP. Loads of people can't even do one.
bestnameright 14
Way to make me feel bad!:(
saIty 17
Do you know what's more impressive? Dick push ups. Yup I don't mean to brag but my records two.. Ya.. I'ma badass.
pickles1994 18
14- Their*
dmoran20 27
We all make mistakes #19. Keep your chin up...
Cbizzlez 10
She'll get her period then we will see who can do more pull ups
chlorinegreen 27
What does a period have to do with pull ups? Just curious.
SillyGirl4602 23
So when she gets her period she will suddenly not be able to do chin ups anymore?
therealafroninga 10
Obvi. Brush up on yo anatomy.
piff7 14
Idk but I think they could have meant wait until she hits puberty? When I was in elementary school I could easily do 20 pull ups and now I'm 16 and can't even do 1 pull up(I am not fat at all and am athletic). Hips/boobs apparently are supposed to hinder your ability to do pull ups...
Zach_Puncake 14
Cramps and being crabby and kinda lazy i guess
timjones 8
Might want to invest in her. She could turn out to be something great.
IAmJad 18
It's MUCH easier to do chin/pull ups as a kid. I used to be the same way.
defferwa 9
It's because they have less weight to pull up.
ahc123 4
Haha yea I totally agree lol when i was 10 I beat the whole grades record making 37!! Wow hah now I'm pretty sure I cant even do 1.....ahhhh, the glory days.....