Today, at work, I saw a van in our car park with "Hurlz Wagon" painted on its side. Laughing, I told the customer who owned it that I loved the name, and I asked was there a funny vomit story behind it. She didn't laugh, and told me it was her family name. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my car broke down. My colleague came to get me and then, later, my husband picked me up from work. We went to collect my abandoned car, but it was gone. It took 10 minutes of me panicking and thinking it had been stolen before he crumpled in laughter and told me he'd already collected it. FML
Today, I got on the bus to go to work. I managed to get a seat, but an old lady who looked tired had to stand. I offered her my seat, but she glared at me, frowned and said, "Go fuck yourself." Everyone laughed as I sat there in dismay. FML
Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML
Today, my boss entrusted me with his car to run an errand, as I usually take the bus. I managed to get there and back safely before someone slammed into me while I was re-entering the lot, causing major damage. It was his wife, who thought I was a car thief. FML
Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML
Today, I was going to a Harry Potter convention since I love the books so much. On my drive there I got lost, and it only got worse when my car broke down. Since I'd forgotten my phone, I tried to hitch a ride. I stood on the side of a road for two hours dressed like Ron Weasley. FML
Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to sneak out of work early and pay a little visit to the pub. I ended up staggering home, drunkenly making myself a nacho cheese dorito milkshake with the blender, then promptly puked my guts out all over the kitchen table. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job Mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML
Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML
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Top comments
helpfulperson 9
Not your fault, just trying to share a good laugh
center 5
I suppose you could up the ante by asking her if there is a neat vomit story to her family name.
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Comments (78)
helpfulperson 9
Not your fault, just trying to share a good laugh
gc327072 31
My last name is Lulz. People always laugh at me :'(
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Not as bad as Chairman Lmao...
Enslaved 38
Come on, I can imagine being addressed as "Mr. Chairman" would be super cool!(: Ironchef
imavelociraptor 6
They do it for the lulz...
JustDerpin 11
At least it's not Gaylord.
Snazzy_Snaz 17
I have a friend who's last name is faget :/ sticks and stones break his bones, but words still hurt him
mooleelee 0
That's disgusting
jetsown08 21
Yeah man, names can just be SO nasty, right? /sarcasm
one11oh 2
2 - If you take things like this too seriously, FML isn't good for you
BunchieRules 31
I wonder how 2 felt about the moldy fat rolls a couple FMLs down...
missababgaga 19
No, you're disgusting!
center 5
I suppose you could up the ante by asking her if there is a neat vomit story to her family name.
Mister_Triangle 21
"Is it because everyone throws up when they see your family portrait?"
icrest80 4
I know a kid named Harry wang so don't worry about it. The owner probably has heard the joke before anyway
pabst4america 1
Lol @ your profile description
gracehi 33
I must admit, I too loled at their profile.
mimi_animee 18
I know a kid who's last name is butt.
DocBastard 40
Really? Her family name is "Wagon"?
gc327072 31
There are some weird-ass names these days...
beccaishereyay 11
9- sarcasm
Stealth_Void 4
I think it's German.
Googolman 29
I think her last name is Hurlz, and wagon means car, like station wagon.
Eaglestrike117 29
64 - Really??
mvc3ftw 17
Yes doc,they are descended from the noble Station Wagons of the 1930's.
beccaishereyay 11
That's not really your fault. I'm sure they get that all the time. If they take it too personally that's their problem.
onlychildFTW 34
OP was just trying to lighten the mood with a laugh. I don't think it's a big deal what happened. A bit awkward maybe but OPs life isn't over.
Futacy 30
I don't see how that would be funny either way :/ But she still didn't have to get so upset about it.
CoconutOil 7
I read the FML twice. In which part did she get so upset again?
Futacy 30
I kind of assumed it from the "not laughing" part.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
She doesn't have a sense of humor, and obviously she's not very nice; she couldn't have explained without being rude?
kakarot2 11
You are an idiot.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
And you're an ass. How does my comment make me an idiot? OP didn't say or do anything mean, the woman needs to get the stick out of her ass. EDIT: I also am not really sure why OP found it so funny, but the woman shouldn't be a bitch about it. I'm sure she gets that all the time.
kakarot2 11
Yes you are. Please, read the FML again and tell me where she was being rude? She didn't laugh at the joke, and told him it was her last name. If you think this was rude, then you need to take the stick out of your ass.
evilplatypus 39
Apparently, 8 can magically read tone of voice, body language and facial expression in the FML if they were able to determine her apparent "rudeness".
Googolman 29
How the hell was she being rude? She just didn't laugh. Would you be flattered if someone said your last name sounds like vomit?
mintcar 10
I can only imagine the kind of evil stare she gave you.
ant1078 7
Tbh hurlz Wagon is a horrible name for a company van, I feel sorrier for the owner
ant1078 7
Andddd I'm not sure if sorrier is actually a word so sorry in advance, if not, f-off grammar Nazis
SkyyEatsAirplane 11
At least you're being creative
hotshot2626 9
Just for future reference it would be "more sorry"