By Stalkerella - 08/05/2018 05:51

Today, I asked my neighbor to kindly move his truck because it blocks my driveway and the side entrance to my yard. He responded by throwing a decapitated bird onto my front lawn and filing an injunction against me for stalking. FML
I agree, your life sucks 4 625
You deserved it 257

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ohsnapword 21

If he is blocking your driveway, you can have his truck towed.

Stick the bird in his tail pipe. Or the trucks

Comments

what type of bird was it?

A decapitated one, duh!

Neighborhood conflicts - It’s better to prevent them than to sort them out once they start. It would be interesting to know exactly what OP said to the neighbor and how it was said before assuming that the neighbor is just an insane A-hole. (And neighbor might be just that.) Once things get heated, it’s very hard to calm things down. We cannot fix OP’s problem with their neighbor. But this is a good example of why it’s best to start off on a pleasant tone with your neighbors.

the word "kindly" gives us a clue

OH_HappyDays 13

Well the fact that he threw a DECAPITATED bird just doesn't scream sane.

ohsnapword 21

If he is blocking your driveway, you can have his truck towed.

The court will go easy on you because you’re not a very good stalker. If you were, he’d have found the decapitated bird on the driver’s seat of his truck. That’s how you stalk!

Stick the bird in his tail pipe. Or the trucks

The ol' bird in the tailpipe trick?

Awesome idea and if you have disposed of the bird already you can shoved hotdog buns up there too. Or stick boloney all over his paint, it will ruin his car. Just make sure there no cameras. You can also put the yellow pages from the phone book (if you can find one) all over his lawn and turn the sprinklers on, it will turn his grass yellow. Good luck!

Petey didn’t have a head!

Zekfen 17

I think William Wallace had a good response to this type of thing. Two questions, do you have access to a horse? And do you have a ball and chain?

I was thinking about Vito Corleone. His plan also had a horse in it!

Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20

Two can play that game....

"Well, that escalated quickly."

alright, I've got an idea but were gonna need a forklift, a blow up sex doll, and a gallon of cottage cheese.

I'm in. what's the plan?

Lobby_Bee 17

I got the sex doll part covered, albeit used.