Today, some popped-collar wearing shitbird tried to pick me up with the line, "You look like Marilyn Monroe's corpse! Wanna fuck?" FML
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By
Tarlachia
| 33
"Sorry, in life, I had standards. In death, you still don't meet them."
By
nofreeusernames
| 10
Shitbird is my new favourite word. Thank you.
COMMENTS
By
NOTaDISTRACTION
| 17
Well... Did it work?
Reply
Retaheki
| 27
If he was called a 'shitbird' for it, then I'd assume not.
Reply
DorLeon
| 14
"tried to pick" should give u a hint about it :)
Reply
xxNIGHTxx_fml
| 17
I'm more then positive it didn't.
Reply
tswizz
| 13
And I bet when OP said no, his reaction would've been to tell her she's a bitch and he wouldn't fuck her anyway
Reply
Jacqueline G Mackay
| 10
lol
By
Xobubblyxo
| 23
Blunt much?
Reply
xxNIGHTxx_fml
| 17
Well, rude.
By
devildog562
| 33
If it worked... No I still wouldn't have the balls and disrespect to talk to a lady like that. Society has been interesting lately .
Reply
Tthug
| 34
Society has always been interesting. It's just only in recent times that everybody gets to hear about it.
By
alysssssssa
| 16
It's kind of a compliment?
Reply
ohSNAPyall
| 26
You sexy, sexy corpse.
Reply
patrickalamo
| 47
What a pale completion, so life like, yet cold to the tough.
Reply
devi_916
| 39
How is being told you look like ANYONE'S corpse a compliment? I would much rather look alive...
Reply
cmac86
| 23
It is for necrophiliacs
By
nofreeusernames
| 10
Shitbird is my new favourite word. Thank you.
Reply
docphilsman
| 15
it's brilliant
Reply
jvfelicio
| 13
Lol I just remember Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder, "Listen here Shitbird!"
Reply
redstone7693
| 29
"popped collar wearing shitbird" is now one of my new insults
Reply
hunterjumper88
| 8
That's a good one, but even better is chucklefuck bitch - courtesy of another FML.
By
cocoshake
| 16
wow okay he just went straight to the point
By
boating_guy
| 33
Part of me hopes you slapped him, part of me wishes he magically just disappeared from the humankind's gene pool
Reply
Vitotaylor36
| 13
Or better yet, her slap made him disappear from the gene pool.
By
Andatop
| 16
People don't put much effort in stuff like complements anymore..
Reply
photographer49
| 22
#8 didn't even know that counted as a compliment.
Reply
PerditaDessa
| 38
I don't know, I think you ought to give him some points for creativity on this one. I don't think it was a complement, and he probably shouldn't have said it but it's not a describer I've ever heard before.
By
TheFuckGiver1230
| 22
How would he know what her corpse looks like?
Reply
devildog562
| 33
Do you really want the answers to that question?
By
victorvldv
| 8
What a romantic guy.. Fucktard >.>