By Anonymous - 20/02/2015 21:26 - United States - Moorpark

Today, some popped-collar wearing shitbird tried to pick me up with the line, "You look like Marilyn Monroe's corpse! Wanna fuck?" FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 948
You deserved it 2 755

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"Sorry, in life, I had standards. In death, you still don't meet them."

Shitbird is my new favourite word. Thank you.


Well... Did it work?

If he was called a 'shitbird' for it, then I'd assume not.

"tried to pick" should give u a hint about it :)

I'm more then positive it didn't.

And I bet when OP said no, his reaction would've been to tell her she's a bitch and he wouldn't fuck her anyway

Jacqueline G Mackay 10


If it worked... No I still wouldn't have the balls and disrespect to talk to a lady like that. Society has been interesting lately .

Society has always been interesting. It's just only in recent times that everybody gets to hear about it.

It's kind of a compliment?

You sexy, sexy corpse.

What a pale completion, so life like, yet cold to the tough.

How is being told you look like ANYONE'S corpse a compliment? I would much rather look alive...

It is for necrophiliacs

Shitbird is my new favourite word. Thank you.

it's brilliant

Lol I just remember Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder, "Listen here Shitbird!"

"popped collar wearing shitbird" is now one of my new insults

That's a good one, but even better is chucklefuck bitch - courtesy of another FML.

wow okay he just went straight to the point

Part of me hopes you slapped him, part of me wishes he magically just disappeared from the humankind's gene pool

Or better yet, her slap made him disappear from the gene pool.

People don't put much effort in stuff like complements anymore..

#8 didn't even know that counted as a compliment.

I don't know, I think you ought to give him some points for creativity on this one. I don't think it was a complement, and he probably shouldn't have said it but it's not a describer I've ever heard before.

How would he know what her corpse looks like?

Do you really want the answers to that question?

What a romantic guy.. Fucktard >.>