By Anonymous - 20/02/2015 21:26 - United States - Moorpark

Today, some popped-collar wearing shitbird tried to pick me up with the line, "You look like Marilyn Monroe's corpse! Wanna fuck?" FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 986
You deserved it 2 771

Same thing different taste

Top comments

"Sorry, in life, I had standards. In death, you still don't meet them."

Shitbird is my new favourite word. Thank you.


If he was called a 'shitbird' for it, then I'd assume not.

"tried to pick" should give u a hint about it :)

And I bet when OP said no, his reaction would've been to tell her she's a bitch and he wouldn't **** her anyway

If it worked... No I still wouldn't have the balls and disrespect to talk to a lady like that. Society has been interesting lately .

Society has always been interesting. It's just only in recent times that everybody gets to hear about it.

What a pale completion, so life like, yet cold to the tough.

How is being told you look like ANYONE'S corpse a compliment? I would much rather look alive...

Shitbird is my new favourite word. Thank you.

Lol I just remember Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder, "Listen here Shitbird!"

"popped collar wearing shitbird" is now one of my new insults

That's a good one, but even better is chucklefuck bitch - courtesy of another FML.

wow okay he just went straight to the point

Part of me hopes you slapped him, part of me wishes he magically just disappeared from the humankind's gene pool

Or better yet, her slap made him disappear from the gene pool.

People don't put much effort in stuff like complements anymore..

#8 didn't even know that counted as a compliment.

PerditaDessa 38

I don't know, I think you ought to give him some points for creativity on this one. I don't think it was a complement, and he probably shouldn't have said it but it's not a describer I've ever heard before.

How would he know what her corpse looks like?

Do you really want the answers to that question?