Today, my mom was feeling down, so I decided to buy her a gift. Knowing she likes lighthouses, I bought her a tiny one that plugs in and lights up. I brought it home, plugged it in, and when she saw me with it, she said, "Wipe that smirk off your face and get that junk out of here." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom lit a candle in our living room, telling the family how much she loved it. She then went on the tell us that my dad got it for her and it must have been some cheap candle. I bought the candle as a gift for her on her birthday. FML
Today, for my mom's birthday, I couldn't figure out what to get her, so I just took some of her jewelry, wrapped it up, and re-gifted it. She recognized it instantly. FML
Today, after lecturing my daughter about being responsible with her money, she got a package from Amazon. What was in it? A lamp shaped like toast. She already has a lamp. FML
Today, it was my mom's birthday. I decided to get her a Willow Tree statue of a woman fairy holding a heart. After dinner, I presented my gift. My mother asked me how much it was. I replied, $30. She threw me a dirty look, shoved the present in my direction, and told me to return it. FML
Today, I asked my mom why the lamp in the living room wasn’t working. She immediately plugged it in, it worked, and she called me a complete idiot. I haven’t slept in a week. FML
Today, my mom and I were talking about a wedding decoration that we are going to use at my wedding. I insisted that I gave the decorations to her and I didn’t bother looking in my house. She came over for the night and cleaned while I was at work. She found the decorations that I'd insisted that I'd given to her. FML
Today, my mother brought over some early Christmas presents for me and the kids. The kid's presents were fine, mine however consisted of many yard accessories, including solar lights. I live in an apartment building with no yard. Her response? "Buy a potted plant and shove them in there." FML
Today, my mom and I went to Best Buy for some Christmas shopping. She picked up some presents for me and told me not to look at what she was buying. When we got to the register, she didn't have enough money, and I ended up having to buy my own presents. FML
Today, my mother opened her birthday gift in front of my entire family. Two days ago, I ordered an essential oil diffuser and flesh light from Amazon. Guess which one she got? FML
Today, my mother scolded me for having a lighter in my room. My reason I had it? The candle that she bought me for my 25th birthday. I don't even live with her anymore, she showed up uninvited, and started going through my stuff. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Holy shit. This is only the second time I saw the actual poster comment. And its even more awesome that it was Noors. Haha.
minorcrisis 8
Wow, nice mom you have there
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (101)
angel_of_death55 7
I wonder why You even try If all she's gonna do is make you cry Or maybe die
loopsy_fml 14
You should go on disneys code 9 and prank her with lighthouses. Then, afterward, say its cuz she didn't appreciate your gift
angel_of_death55 7
No she should have thrown it at her face and said I'm getting the junk outta here
imperialtl 12
Should have got her a *****! LoL
costanzareborn 6
Maybe she thought it was one :P
Rodders_SOTC 1
What a bitch. Should have filled it into a shiv and shanked her with it.
MegaFun_fml 6
So... what did your mom say after that? I hope she accepted your intentions...
Pandacupcakelove 26
Aww :( well, you were just trying to cheer her up. I feel bad for your mom, though. She sounds really upset!
Spazz420 7
Let her be miserable, she deserves it. Enjoy your new lighthouse :)
moseph0240 5
Dewm! I know the feeling! Everytime I try to brighten my moms day or even talk about something happy I get knocked down (trying to help someone up) HA! what a dewm joke
jfotogs 0
Thumbs down for saying "dewm" instead of "damn"... Sounds too much like you're a toddler trying to spell "doom"
Cathrin 26
I think he was trying to say "dumb", not "damn", judging by context. Still a bad misspelling.
emeraldisle 30
Congrats on your FML getting published Noor!
TheDrifter 24
Yeah, a birthday would be good. Some days are just grumpy days and even cool gifts won't brighten them.