Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend was getting up to leave and I, trying to... - FML

By dontpanic - 21/09/2009 19:08 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was getting up to leave and I, trying to be romantic, got up behind her and tried to swing her back down onto the bed and kiss her simultaneously, misjudged the distance and threw her into the wall, her head then bounced off the wall and into my forehead, spraining her nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 492

You deserved it 26 939

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Same thing different taste

By Ouch - 25/04/2011 19:31 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate and planning on having sex for the first time. I picked her up off the couch, and in so doing, accidentally lifted her too high, putting her head through the ceiling. She had a mild concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 740

You deserved it 20 684

New moves

By Glassjaw - 01/08/2009 07:23 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I had gotten tipsy and found ourselves in the bedroom. We started to fool around and she leaned over to put her watch on the nightstand. I tried to undo her bra, which surprised her, because she elbowed me in the nose so hard that I ended up passing out from the pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 133

You deserved it 7 992

It was an accident!

By innocent - 06/01/2014 21:32 - Australia

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 978

You deserved it 7 499

By Nerrh - 12/03/2011 10:53 - Australia

Today, I tickled my girlfriend, and her first reflex was to swing her elbow back and break my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 232

You deserved it 33 634

By Anonymous - 17/02/2010 20:44 - United States

Today, I was in school and spotted my girlfriend in the hallway. I wanted to be all romantic and grab her like guys do in movies. I grabbed her wrist forcefully and pulled her out of the crowd. As I quickly leaned in to kiss her I broke her nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 386

You deserved it 37 846

By staciedee - 01/06/2010 09:49 - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be cute to try and pick me up while kissing, instead he tripped and slammed the back of my head on the corner of the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 165

You deserved it 4 949

Love hurts

By wray16 - 26/02/2021 21:30 - United States

Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 127

Romantic move

By soomeone - 16/02/2010 19:28 - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 679

You deserved it 25 635

By Henry - 11/11/2011 22:29 - Norway

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend agreed to doing it doggy style. During it all, I pulled on her hair. I guess I pulled too hard, because when I let go, her face smacked straight into the bedside table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 972

You deserved it 45 786

By hero to zero - 04/07/2011 16:09 - United States

Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 119

You deserved it 15 177

Next

Top comments

DynamicDave 11

Monday 21 September 2009 23:46

Is it even possible to sprain a nose?

OHIOxRAIN 0

Monday 21 September 2009 23:22

Nothing says romance like a bloody nose

Comments

EvilTonyBlair 0

Monday 21 September 2009 23:55

this sounds fake

CL41RE 0

Tuesday 22 September 2009 0:10

ydi as soon as I saw "tried"

BobbleHead54 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 22:13

trying.... not tried....o.o

hippieboy699 0

Tuesday 18 September 2012 20:22

Ok whats ydi.? Im new :p

RatIsKing 0

Tuesday 22 September 2009 0:12

smooth move genius. ydi

RJB 0

Tuesday 22 September 2009 0:13

haha sucks 4 u..it's the opposite don't be hard with a girl be soft.. :-(

Harrywhat 0

Tuesday 22 September 2009 0:20

Romance fail.

Jincos 0

Tuesday 22 September 2009 0:42

Did you lick the blood in a sexy way too?

Lythiaren 8

Tuesday 22 September 2009 1:05

I would like to know how one can sprain a nose. It's not a joint.

ZeusBeDubsteppin 24

Sunday 28 December 2014 4:50

^this

justmyluck1212 0

Tuesday 22 September 2009 1:22

hahahaha lol, you cant say you didnt try

movies12 0

Tuesday 22 September 2009 3:13

Ur really smooth dude.

hellokelly_fml 0

Tuesday 22 September 2009 3:24

how do you sprain your nose?

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Today, I saw my super creepy live-in uncle standing in the kitchen holding a pair of my underwear and smiling at it, humming to himself. He didn't see me. I stood there for at least 30 seconds in shock, and when I backed away he was still looking at them. FML

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