Miscellaneous: Today, my friends told me that I'm not invited to the next trip... - FML

By canadiangirl98 - Canada - Brampton

Today, my friends told me that I'm not invited to the next trip because I'm a party pooper for not getting drunk and staying out late during our last vacation. I guess they forgot that I spent each night taking care of their drunk asses and stayed sober to be the designated driver. FML

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canadiangirl98 tells us more :

Wow I can't believe my FML was posted! I love this site! Just to elaborate so people get the full picture: We were supposed to take turns being the DD each night but they would be drunk by the time we got to the venue so I had no choice but to be DD. I'm okay with drinking and letting loose and don't get in the way of others fun but these girls were rowdy belligerent drunk and I spent the evening ensuring they didn't get themselves into a bad situation and the morning helping their hangovers. Either way these girls are no longer people I associate with.

Commando

This Charming Man

And today, on Dr Phil…

By c

Today, I finally got up the courage to tell my boyfriend of a year and a half that I love him. His response was to start to snore, pretending to be asleep. FML

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By Photos - United States

Today, after I got home from school I went to my room to find the maid had cleaned it, also to find a bag labeled "trash" it was all the sketches and paintings I had done in art class, which is my major plan for college. FML

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By Fuck's sake! - Singapore - Singapore

Today, it turned out the twit I've been overcharging for drinks in my bar for wearing shades indoors is actually blind. FML

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By Anonymous

There you go

Today, our work computers are down so I've been trying to fix it via my home computer for 3 days. My 12-year-old son took one look at the screen, changed 2 settings on a drop down menu, and the problem was fixed. My 12-year-old is better at my job than I am. FML

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By Nick Nameous - United States

Today, I celebrated the new year. Alone. FML

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By fml - Canada

Today, my dad screamed at me, called me a monster, told me he wanted me to move out, and that I better start looking for an apartment. Why? I slammed the microwave door. FML

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By usmcgirl - United States

Today, I realized why my 50 year old Dad's 30 something girlfriend looked so familiar. She is in all my parents wedding photos... as the flower girl. FML

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By kerdersty - Canada

Today, I was snowboarding when a skier cut me off, resulting in me colliding with a 12 year old girl. The girl was totally fine, and I was alright except for a slight nose bleed. I apologized to the girl, then her mom hit me over the back with a ski pole as I snowboarded away. FML

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By fuckinghicks - United States

Today, while going on a jog through the countryside, I discovered that it is actually possible outside of crappy TV shows to have a rifle leveled at you, and to be shouted at to, "Get off my land." FML

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By gaagaa - United States

Today, a lady told me her husband had sinus surgery. I replied, "Oh, I know someone who just had that done." I then realized I meant Alexis on The Real Housewives of the OC. FML

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By rejected - United Kingdom - Harlow

Today, I thought I was finally over my anxiety problem, and confidently went to my first ever job interview. Halfway through, the manager tells me that if I didn't stop being so nervous, he couldn't give me the job. I cried. FML

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By lovelikewoe - United States

Today, I made my mom a mix CD for her car. It took me ages to find just the right songs that would be perfect for her. When I played it for her in the car, she took it out and threw it out of the window. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, after lunch with my frail, disabled, 87-year-old father, I reached into my purse for lipstick. I didn't recognize the cute cylinder I pulled out, but thinking it was a flashlight, I pressed the little button, spraying my dad and myself in the face with pepper spray. FML

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By Sally - United States

Today, I went over to the house of a guy I have hooked up with a few times. After we got done, I asked him why we were not in the room across the hall. He said that was his twin brother's room. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Bad day

Today, I accidentally set off an alarm at the school I work for. No one was there, I didn't have the code or password the company needed, my boss wouldn't answer his phone, 3 policemen interrogated me and asked for ID but realized I left home without my wallet. There was nothing I could do. I cried. FML

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By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Bath

Today, I learned that the house I've been living in and paying rent for the past two months was never advertised as vacant. I learned this when the actual homeowners walked in, and called the police for an "intruder." FML

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By Olive14

Today, I was caring for a bird that had flown into my window. I thought the poor thing wouldn't make it, when it shit in my hand, flew into my neck, then around my living room for ages before I could manage to get it out of the window. FML

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By militarywife2b - France

Today, at work, I watched a man throw up in his hands, dump the contents on his plate, then eat the things it "didn't touch". I had to wash his plate. FML

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By lprocter1982 - Canada

Today, I got shot at. Not by police, but by a hunter. While at work. Driving a garbage truck. How the hell a hunter mistook an orange-clad garbageman in a truck for a deer is beyond me. FML

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By ohcollege - United States

Today, the rain was pouring really hard outside. I found this out when it started raining on me at 4 am inside my dorm room. Thanks college. FML

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By Anonymous - 28/2/2021 04:01 - United States - Weyauwega

Ungeeked

Today, while trying to fix a corrupted USB hard drive with my wife’s computer I accidentally wiped her laptop drive instead of clearing the external drive. I’m not allowed on her computers anymore. FML

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By Binks - United States - Bonneau

Today, my dad took away my Xbox because "You never do anything active." I had just run a 5K. FML

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By Anonymous - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I caught my 7 year old sister poking a dead bird with a stick, causing maggots to start coming out of the bird's sad little body. I was horrified and threw up. She won't stop mocking me for being a "sissy". FML

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By mommydearest - Denmark

Today, my paranoid wreck of a girlfriend read a text message on my phone from a woman asking if I was coming over for dinner. The woman was my mom. My girlfriend stormed out and hasn't answered my calls all day. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I came home to find my 25 year old boyfriend laughing hysterically at his laptop while he made Microsoft Sam say "feces", "penis", and "diarrhea". FML

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By dumped - United States

You tried

Today, I was in the shower and I heard my boyfriend walk in. I struck my sexiest pose and when he came in, he looked me up and down and told me, "You look like my mother." Thanks. FML

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By Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I fell down the stairs while reading the 'mind your step' sign. FML

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By chelse_elyce - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car. We were in the front seat and I was on top. My ass hit the horn and scared my boyfriend so bad, he jumped, causing me to hit my head so hard that I swear I got a concussion. FML

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By Aliiveopen - 24/8/2020 07:02 - United States - Wasilla

Demon drink

Today, my mom got blackout drunk and tried to fight me, my stepdad, and my brother, resulting in my stepdad leaving, my brother getting 2 holes from a metal shelf my mom tried to joust him with, and I got bit. FML

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By anoymus - United States

Today, I was driving to the local market with my son. We approached a vehicle that looked just like my fiancé's. My son peered out his window and said, "Mommy, daddy's getting kidnapped!" It seems he was being 'kidnapped' by his new girlfriend. FML

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By cmac1229 - United States

Today, I was at a gas station and I went to the bathroom. Thinking some was already in the bathroom, I waited for ten minutes while people lined up behind me only to find out that it was empty. FML

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By izziegrl - Mexico - Naucalpan

Today, I realized that I spend more money on gas to go to my job than what I get paid. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was shopping at the grocery market and was next in line. Behind me was a woman who only had two items, so I nicely let her in front of me, as it looked like she was in a hurry. When she was all rung up, she decided to pay her $16.45 in loose change which needed to be counted out. FML

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By xCZ75x - United Kingdom - Potters Bar

Today, my best friend on Snapchat is my mum. FML

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By Mack - Canada

Today, I was at the book store when a book caught my eye: Overcoming Anxiety For Dummies. I wanted to look through the book but I was too nervous to pick it up, thinking everyone in the store would look at me. FML

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By Anonymous - Mexico - Ensenada

Today, I was denounced for being a terrible person, because my family raises chickens, some of which we eat. I was then told how cruel I am for "killing innocent birds" and that "good" people buy their meat from the supermarket. FML

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By bad luck Bianca - United States - Houston

Today, I saw a stick in my car and picked it up to throw it out the window. The "stick" turned out to have eyes. It was a dead lizard. FML

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By appleville - United States

Today, a customer at one of my tables left his phone number and a smiley face on the credit card slip. I was completely flattered until I looked at the bottom of the slip and realized that he had left me a $0.26 tip. FML

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By Anonymous - United States - San Ramon

Today, my leadership class was trying to decide who would run the kissing booth in our local carnival. Someone suggested me, to which the director replied, "We'd never make any profit with her." FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, while lifeguarding, I slipped and fell from my chair and onto the cement. Embarrassed and actually quite hurt, I tried to climb back up to the chair, but it tipped. I fell half onto the cement half into the pool, just before the chair landed on top of me. FML

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Top comments

By Capteen_fml | 16

#6377684 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:27

Sounds like it's time to ditch them and find more appreciative friends - or at least ones that'll take turns being designated driver

By flocket | 13

#6377695 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:33

Well that sucks, maybe you should find friends that respect your responsible actions

COMMENTS

By keilei | 24

#6377679 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:24

Good on you, and sucks for them.

Reply

tantanpanda | 26

#6377865 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 16:33

Yea, it's their loss. Why hang out with people like that anyway?

Reply

stingray112 | 24

#6377875 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 16:47

Idk I feel if ALL of them think she's a party pooper, then there's probably more to the story OP might very well be.

By lukian_fml | 29

#6377681 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:26

Time to find a new designated driver as a friend. Or you know, make use of those magnificent ride sharing services!

By whassallt26 | 13

#6377682 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:26

Well if you didn't have fun last time, it only seems like a loss for them

By nater535 | 7

#6377683 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:26

Those are some crappy friends.

Reply

bwinski | 19

#6379733 - Thursday 13 August 2015 10:03

Ya seriously though. Don't sacrifice your beliefs for people who don't respect you. Good job for being responsible!

By Capteen_fml | 16

#6377684 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:27

Sounds like it's time to ditch them and find more appreciative friends - or at least ones that'll take turns being designated driver

By flocket | 13

#6377695 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:33

Well that sucks, maybe you should find friends that respect your responsible actions

By ally8 | 21

#6377696 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:36

Well you shouldn't have been the designated driver every night... But still their loss

Reply

mergeterge | 24

#6377896 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 17:53

Why does this have so many down votes? lol If OP had an issue, they should just announce that they aren't DD and do whatever they want. Worst case scenario, they use public transportation. No big deal.

By gosh_mate | 30

#6377697 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:52

That's very considerate of you, I'm sure you can find some friends who appreciate that. :)

By thefmlman2011 | 35

#6377699 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:55

You need friends who appreciate your help

By amandathemermaid | 19

#6377700 - Tuesday 11 August 2015 10:58

Props to you for not driving drunk so your friends can have a good time while also ensuring they'll get home safe! You're a great friend.