Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend dragged me along to one of her family's paintball matches. Her father is a former marine, and hates my guts. He kept going well out of his way to hunt me down and pump as many rounds into me as possible without causing a scene. FML
Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML
Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML
Today, I went paintballing with my siblings. Once we were done, they realised I hadn't been shot at all. They cornered me in the forest and lit me up. I have welts all over my legs. FML
Today, I played an intense paintball match, with me and my friends versus my boyfriend and his buddies. When we won, my boyfriend went mental and said he only lost because of "lag". When I pointed out we weren't in a video game, he reacted by firing a paintball straight into my chest. FML
Today, I went paintballing with my girlfriend and her family. Her dad ended up shooting me, and I doubled over in pain. I thought that was it, until he stepped back and shot me several more times in the stomach. "Just double-tapping," he smirked. More like quadruple-tapping. FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to join my friends for a game of paintball. I got shot in the same spot three times in a row. It turned out to be my own team, who mistook me for the enemy because I was wearing… camouflage. FML
Today, I went to a paintball match with a group of friends, one of whom brought his dad along. His dad is a weight-lifting, wannabe alpha male fucknut who thinks that chokeslamming opponents is a legitimate close-quarters paintball tactic. My broken shoulder disagrees. FML
Today, it was my friend's paintball party and we were doing it in a forest nearby. When I arrived at his house, his parents said they already started, so I geared up and went out there to find that there was a note on a tree. It said 'Sorry', and then twenty people jumped from bushes and ambushed me. FML
Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML
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Top comments
XDsmileyDX_fml 24
Flashbacks from 'Nam. Getcha every time.
mspiggy3712 11
Don't judge a book by its cover
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Comments (105)
SuperCherrry 1
Nobody's too old for a game of paint ball.
raeepressley 12
Serves you right bro! Don't underestimate your grandparents! I'm 5'9 and have about 50-60lbs on my 4'10, 73 year old grandmother, and there's not a doubt in my mind that she could kick my ass any day of the week, even if I were to put up a fight!
n00b4liciou5 10
Never mess with a Vet...
Kkkdawg 27
That was a pretty rude thing to say, all around. If he didn't think he was able to play, he wouldn't have asked to play. And since it was a family gathering, he probably just wanted to be part of it. Not all seniors are 100 years old and crippled. We shouldn't assume we know their limitations. Seniors are getting more and more young at heart these days.
davincidasecond 24
Telling a person they're 'too old' for something, especially at that age? You're just looking for trouble man.
Blink_me26 21
Your grandpa sounds awesome.
SweetasCandy0609 28
your grandpa doesn't sound too old to me he sounds pretty cool.
stupidbox 9
your grandpa is awesome!!'
Blizztastic21 17
paintball doesn't hurt that bad.
an3ph 20
I'm going to guess he was in the military, and he was pleased to find out that he still has it. Once a soldier always a soldier.