Broken and Love: Today, my date kept offering to drop me off back home because...

By Oops_Im_Blushing

Today, my date kept offering to drop me off back home because he thought I wasn't enjoying myself at the dance. I wasn't enjoying myself at the dance because he kept asking if I wanted to leave. FML

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Oops_Im_Blushing tells us more :

Hi guys, I'm the OP here! And I just want to clarify somethings. I in fact told him that I was enjoying myself and that he didn't need to keep asking. And I don't think it was that he didn't want to spend time with me as he texted me later seeing if we could see eachother the next day. So I still have no idea lol.

Broken

Love

Taking stock

Oh, hai!

Deadly cocktail

By Anonymous - United States

Today, everyone in my department got a raise except for me. Last week, I had been the one who asked for a raise for me and my fellow department members. FML

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By crazystuff23 - United States

Today, I saw the following message on my Facebook News Feed: "Morning Sex: [My mom] and [My dad] are fans. Click here to Join" FML

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By Anonymous - France

Today, I gave a beautiful book of baby names to a friend of mine who's been trying to get pregnant for a while. She just burst into tears when she saw it. Just before meeting me, she'd found out she was sterile. FML

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By unfortunatelyunlucky - United States

Today, while parked at school, someone broke into my car by smashing the window. I called the police and they informed me I could drive it to the local station as it was an easy 2 minute drive. As I was driving there, I got pulled over for driving with a smashed window. FML

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By Anonymous - 14/7/2020 02:00

Too embarrassed to get them from a store?

Today, I was told by Amazon that a belt I had ordered was arriving. I grabbed an Amazon package out of the mailbox without even checking who the package was addressed to. I now have an awkward apology ahead of me for opening my stepbrother's box of condoms. FML

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By wellthisisbad - United States - Boynton Beach

Today, I learned that not only am I pregnant, I'm too far along for an abortion. My husband and I originally bonded over the fact that we both hate children. FML

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By Anonymous

Today, I opened my window due to the good weather. I was lucky enough to listen to the sounds of someone violently throwing up for over an hour. The window got stuck open. FML

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By BellinaNico - United States - Mcdonough

Today, I called my fiancé just to tell him how much I love him, as a sweet gesture. He yelled at me for interrupting his video game and blamed my "neediness" on the fact that I'm menstruating. FML

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By Anonymous - Canada

Not how it works...

Today, my classmate told me she can copy an article from the internet and hand that in, as long as she cites it at the end. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, a kid grabbed the receiver to my cochlear implant and ran off with it. I went to a security guard, and, if my lip reading was accurate, he said to "try and make it through the day without it". Without it, I can't hear anything. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was feeling sick but went into my waitressing job because I'd already missed 3 days this week. I was dizzy and managed to spill a tray of drinks all over the customers. Then, when their food was done, I tripped and spilled hot chili all over the man's lap. FML

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By otherdad?

Today, I tried to explain my 8-year-old son that my fiancée was going to be his stepmother. Little did I know, he watched Coraline last week. Now he thinks she's his "other mother" and won't go anywhere near her. FML

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By Greg - United Kingdom

Today, I got left in the middle of slow dancing with a girl I liked. She came back and said, "Sorry, I had to make sure the guy I really like knows that I don't like you." FML

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By Anonymous - France

Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML

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By devigsgirl - United States

Today, I found out that the only reason my boyfriend wants to move in with me is so he has better internet connection and won't get kicked off of Xbox live while playing MW2. FML

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By tammy - France

Today, a wasp stung my nipple. Twice. The swelling makes it look like I'm growing a third breast. FML

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By happybirthday - United Kingdom

Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me a Paul Frank t-shirt. It says "I'm single." FML

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34546

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By Phoebe - Singapore

Today, my husband and I were in bed when the alarm on his phone went off. He then told me that he had to 'sound the horn' and went over to his laptop. Wondering what that meant, I peered over at his laptop. It turns out hunting for mice on Facebook is more important than procreating. FML

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By tandc - United States

Today, in a rush to squeeze out of a particularly tight parking spot, I made a hurried 12-point turn. Just to make sure I had enough room behind, I hopped out of my car. It was still in reverse. I managed to wreck my own car without even sitting in it. FML

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By creepingjennie - 7/6/2020 02:11

Because I'm worth it

Today, I discovered that head lice shampoo can remove the dye from your hair. FML

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By Eloise

Today, I went on my third date with a great guy. We finally got round to talking about his tattoos. All 57 are related to his best friend. All of them. The best friend he never stops talking about. Somehow I don't think this will work out. FML

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By damn - Australia - Sydney

Today, I had a fight with my boyfriend over a girl he is close to. He later arrived with flowers for what I thought was an apology. He was actually breaking up with me; the flowers were for her, he just didn't want to leave them in the car. FML

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By simon

Today, my mother, who insists on sticking her nose into every aspect of my life, found out I'm only "middle management" and called my boss to criticize her for undervaluing me, demanding I be promoted immediately. I am now the laughingstock of my office. FML

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By dpimente - 17/12/2020 11:05

With friends like these…

Today, I checked my bank account online and noticed two checks that I didn't write had gone through, so I got copies of them and recognized the handwriting. It was my best friend's. FML

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By smellynelly - United States - Buffalo

Today, I found out the reason my co-workers have been giving me gum every day is not because of their generosity, but because everyone in the office thinks my breath smells. FML

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By nhyari - South Africa - Cape Town

Today, my girlfriend got her period. It seemed more painful for her than usual, so I offered to go out and buy some painkillers and maybe some chocolate for her. She thought I was being sarcastic and slapped me so hard I saw stars. FML

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By Anonymous

It's only a bit of liquid fun, come on!

Today, I asked the guy I'm dating if he could not drink on our next date, because he ends up drunk-driving every time. His response was, "This isn't working out." FML

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By Anonymous

Corolla Conspiracy

Today, I was talking to one of the advisors at my job about how almost everyone in the workplace who owns a Toyota has strangely been in some sort of car accident in the last year. I happen to have a Toyota. Guess who was rear-ended at an intersection after leaving work. FML

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By starrybrooke - United States

Today, while working the dinner rush at my job, every single computer, credit card machine, and printer froze for an hour and a half. The reason behind this issue was a large wire ripped from the mainframe, the same wire I tripped over 20 seconds before while my boss watched. FML

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By JustAnotherTina - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Australia

Appropriate?

Today, I got an email. It said, "Everyone hates you. We voted." FML

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By Anonymous - New Zealand - Tauranga

Today, I lost my virginity. He then told me, in tears, how bad he felt about leaving his dog alone for the night. FML

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By Anonymous

Today, I dropped in on my wife at her part time waitressing job. As I was leaving, I gave her tushie a playful squeeze. I was then tackled by some acne-ridden teenage blockhead trying to impress the hot waitress by beating up the guy groping her. FML

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By nicholascageonyourface - United States - Papillion

Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins and had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML

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By RBEE - France

Today, my colleague rushed off to the hospital for the birth of his first son. Having met his wife at the Christmas party a couple of years ago, I called to congratulate her. Shame I didn't realize it was his mistress having the baby. Guess who broke the news to the wife. FML

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By catsofly7 - United States

Today, I had a job interview at 9:00am. I left at around 8:30am, and as soon as I got in the car to drive to the interview, I checked my phone again, and it said 10:33. My boyfriend had decided to change the time on my clock as a "joke." FML

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By Welp - Romania

Today, I found out that my company used a nice photo of my coworkers and me for their corporate website, in efforts to make their office seem fun and relaxed. This wouldn't be so bad if they hadn't just fired every single person in the photo, myself included. FML

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By MsConfusedd - United States - Hazlet

Today, I learned that my 76 year old great aunt likes to swim naked, even when I have friends over. FML

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By Anonymous - United States - Chippewa Falls

Today, I was assigned to a group of four to brainstorm ideas for a project. One by one they listed their ideas, but when it was my turn they skipped me. They suddenly started a casual conversation with each other, oblivious of my existence, while I sat quietly between them for an hour. FML

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By shart - Canada - Calgary

Today, I had an accident at work. Not the kind involving worker's compensation. The kind involving desperately scrubbing my office chair with paper towels, before going home to change my pants. FML

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Top comments

By lexiieeex3 | 32

#6712565 - Monday 14 November 2016 9:43

If that's why you weren't enjoying yourself then maybe you should've just been honest with him. Would've saved you both an uncomfortable night.

By Magnoxidans | 19

#6712575 - Monday 14 November 2016 10:24

I've been one of those people when I was younger OP, always triple checking my date was having a good time. If you liked him, give him another chance - but preface the date with the stipulation that he's not allowed to ask you if you're having a good time and you'll tell him if not.

Give him another chance if he asks you out, some people are just more nervous than others

COMMENTS

By lexiieeex3 | 32

#6712565 - Monday 14 November 2016 9:43

If that's why you weren't enjoying yourself then maybe you should've just been honest with him. Would've saved you both an uncomfortable night.

By mariusakke | 15

#6712567 - Monday 14 November 2016 9:48

communication is the answer :)

By christian1509 | 21

#6712568 - Monday 14 November 2016 10:06

Did you try telling him you were having a good time?

By StormfrontX33_fml | 24

#6712569 - Monday 14 November 2016 10:10

He seems like a cow pen, because he's full of shit. Seems like he was just looking for an excuse to leave you. Someone who is not honest, good or bad, doesn't deserve anyone anyway

almost_there44 | 26

#6712787 - Monday 14 November 2016 22:08

Don't know how you jumped to that conclusion based on what OP said. We must have been reading two different submissions because it seems to me like there was a communication issue and not an asshole issue.

StormfrontX33_fml | 24

#6712859 - Tuesday 15 November 2016 1:33

Love how you're jumping onto my comments even though I stopped giving a shit about this site. Almost brings a nostalgic tear to my eye that you're on my balls.

almost_there44 | 26

#6712875 - Tuesday 15 November 2016 2:16

You stopped giving a shit, but yet you're on here AND commenting. Stop always feeling like someone is attacking you and grow the fuck up, the act is getting old.

izzajaneful | 24

#6713094 - Tuesday 15 November 2016 20:23

Jumping on your comments?

It's called a reply, and it's hardly a personal affront. Calm down, man, it's just FML. You're talking this way too seriously.

By Ashael | 5

#6712572 - Monday 14 November 2016 10:14

I think your date was looking for an excuse to "drop you off" at your house, and to go inside for "a last drink".

By Magnoxidans | 19

#6712575 - Monday 14 November 2016 10:24

By hpandher | 16

#6712578 - Monday 14 November 2016 11:04

He seemed nice and caring. Give him another chance.

By Jenmic | 14

#6712606 - Monday 14 November 2016 13:07

Talk about a self-fulfilling prophesy.

By Yudith_fml | 6

#6712610 - Monday 14 November 2016 13:21

Not-so-subtle hint about sexy time? He must have been disappointed when you just closed the door to his face.

Ashael | 5

#6712665 - Monday 14 November 2016 16:09

I wonder why we get downvotes for talking about this possibility...

Oops_Im_Blushing | 12

#6712676 - Monday 14 November 2016 16:48

Haha, yeah he definitely wasn't going for that. Barely got to the door before he left and went back to the dance

Leviathene | 34

#6712840 - Tuesday 15 November 2016 0:31

Wow!! He went back to the dance? Sorry OP, that's just harsh. I wouldn't go out with him again after that.

izzajaneful | 24

#6713095 - Tuesday 15 November 2016 20:25

Wow, he went back to the dance? That's completely ridiculous. Changes the whole FML, really. What an ass.

By Goblin182 | 26

#6712619 - Monday 14 November 2016 13:40

You should have told him he was relived of his "date duty" and free to leave, that you would find another way home.