Miscellaneous: Today, my dad made a new house rule: "If it's yellow let it mellow,... - FML

By Bondi414 - 15/02/2012 05:05 - United States

Today, my dad made a new house rule: "If it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown flush it down." My whole house now smells like pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 529

You deserved it 2 775

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Same thing different taste

By ohlordhelpmenow - 15/01/2012 03:54 - United States

Today, my dad created a new rule: It isn't old until there's mold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 506

You deserved it 2 689

By Anonymous - 04/12/2015 22:17 - United States

Today, even after recovering and being able to walk again, my dad keeps peeing in a bucket by his bed. He sees nothing wrong with this, even though it smells. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 513

You deserved it 1 446

By Whatthe - 18/04/2017 20:00

Today, I walked into a bathroom to find a dad telling his kids not play with the pee in the urinals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 105

You deserved it 364

By Anonymous - 23/09/2018 17:30

Today, my dad's new medicine for his bad intestines makes him fart so hard I can feel the vibrations through the floorboards. The whole house smells like an open sewer and he thinks it's funny. He now has to change his undies several times a day from repeatedly shitting himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 027

You deserved it 176

By IAmACoolCat - 05/07/2011 16:41 - United States

Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 506

You deserved it 4 955

Batshit soup

By Anonymous - 22/06/2023 12:00 - United States - St. Petersburg

Today, I was doing laundry and realized that my father had left dirty underwear soaking in a bucket outside for the last two weeks. I informed him that they needed to be thrown out, and they smelled like sewage. It's been over 95 degrees outside lately here. He then yelled and sweared at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 716

You deserved it 97

Aromatherapee

By Anonymous - 10/10/2023 17:00

Today, I've been potty training my son and almost all of his clothes have been peed on, but for some reason I thought it would be a good idea to do all the laundry together. When I was getting it out of the dryer, everything smelled like pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 661

Bricked up

By Anonymous - 30/07/2022 08:00 - Canada - Regina

Today, I’m staying with a friend who believes in, “If it’s yellow, let it mellow, only brown gets flushed down.” Well, her 3 or 4 mellow yellows with accompanying paper prior to my surprise brown caused the pipe to clog. Oh and the extractor fan doesn’t work either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 874

You deserved it 115

By unicornlovet - 14/08/2019 18:00

Today, I was cleaning, anticipating my hypercritical in-laws coming to see our new house. Literally 10 minutes before they arrived, sewage backed up the basement drain. My father-in-law spent the entire visit commenting on the smell, and how he couldn’t use the washroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 651

You deserved it 120

Spray it loud

By anonymous - 16/08/2015 03:16 - United States - Rock Hill

Today, we learned that our dog can run and urinate simultaneously. The entire house smells like piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 278

You deserved it 2 082

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Top comments

bacincheeseburge 9

Wednesday 15 February 2012 11:47

In this land of sun and fun, we do not flush for number one.

islander03 5

Wednesday 15 February 2012 11:53

That awkward moment now that everytime you flush everyone knows you were pooing ......

Comments

djmacncheeze 6

Wednesday 15 February 2012 21:58

We use that at camp :D

ilove80smetal 8

Wednesday 15 February 2012 22:05

You mean his house smells like piss. Get off your ass and buy a house, then do what you wish with your crap.

d3sigN8t3dDruNk 1

Wednesday 15 February 2012 22:37

If you arent paying the water bill, get over it! Lol bills arent cheap these days

Emani_Jones 0

Wednesday 15 February 2012 22:40

Got that from The Game.!

princess151617 4

Wednesday 15 February 2012 22:41

That's disgusting,

BlackCloudedSldr 5

Wednesday 15 February 2012 23:37

Does your dad feast on asparagus? Piss doesn't normally stink unless its been mixed with anthers urine. Hence public bathrooms smell rancid. Dispose of the asparagus or scold other family members for being this dumb to follow this rule with him.

spurlock62 0

Thursday 16 February 2012 0:11

It's not your house. And flushing a toilet for a small amount of pee is a waste.

burnsie22 5

Thursday 16 February 2012 0:28

At least he's Eco-friendly:)

Lilkay23 0

Thursday 16 February 2012 0:38

lol thats hella nasty who would wanna go to ur house ewwww stinky

RockinRoyaltyxD 13

Thursday 16 February 2012 0:42

Stop being so dramatic, my house has the same rule. And it doesnt smell like pee you guys r just disgusting.

shaleen0909 0

Thursday 16 February 2012 14:48

Why dont you just accept it kid. Its obvious if the bowl is left unflushed it would definitely stink.

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The Top

Today, despite the fact that I'm happy and in love, my spiteful brat of a 12 year-old keeps spreading hateful and disgusting lies about my boyfriend doing unspeakable things while I'm away on business. Her dad told me he's reporting my boyfriend to the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 617

Today, I came back home after a year studying abroad. Imagine my surprise when I found out my mom had gotten breast implants while I was away. All through dinner, I kept catching myself staring at them. No wonder my dad was so much happier than when I left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 775

You deserved it 5 102

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 29 156

You deserved it 10 302

Today, I told my boyfriend he's the only good thing left in my life. That's not a healthy relationship dynamic, he said, and ended up breaking up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 037

You deserved it 3 574

Today, I was babysitting my nephew. He was watching the episode where Spongebob smashes his guitar while playing. I walk into the kitchen to make him a snack, and I hear a loud crash... My nephew smashing my brand new guitar to be like Spongebob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 891

You deserved it 4 506

Today, my boss bragged to a coworker, in front of me, about how much money he saved on a project because he majorly underpays me. My boss is my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 056

You deserved it 2 285

Today, my job has a policy where you can only have two breaks if you work 7 hours or more. I've recently been assigned multiple strings of 6 hour 45 minute shifts. And no, I can't work 15 minutes of overtime so I can have the extra break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 598

You deserved it 186

Today, my wife handed over most of our son's college fund, in cash, to an investment scammer going by the name "Herp A. Derpson". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 121

You deserved it 3 691