Miscellaneous: Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour...

By oh gee, you don't say - 15/12/2012 18:43 - United Kingdom - Southampton

Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour lecture, with supporting research, on how the "Mayan prophecy" is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he thinks we're all borderline brain-dead, gullible fuckwits who believed it to begin with. Thanks, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 015

You deserved it 4 649

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Same thing different taste

By dadsadipshit - 15/02/2013 23:00 - United States

Today, my dad lost his mind over the meteorite incident in Russia. He's convinced that it's part of some big government conspiracy to cover up a UFO crash-landing, and now he won't stop dismissively calling us "sheep" and telling us "do the research" just because we don't agree with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 384

You deserved it 3 194

By Anonymous - 17/07/2012 20:19 - United States - Renton

Today, my father, who is going through a serious mid-life crisis, walked into my room, told me to "sit the fuck down," and spent the next two hours ranting about how the Lord of the Rings books prophesy the end of the world this December, and that Sauron is an analogy for "corrupt bankers." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 717

You deserved it 2 218

By Ryan - 28/08/2011 20:10 - United States

Today, after a long discussion, my dad still doesn't understand how evolution works, and thinks it's a myth that was debunked a long time ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 213

You deserved it 8 168

They exist

By baffleduncle - 27/07/2019 20:00 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I listened to my niece explain to me, in great detail, that the Titanic never sank, and that the year it supposedly did was a prediction of 9/11. She learned all of this from some whackjob conspiracy theory videos, and acts like she's an expert now as a result. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 839

You deserved it 151

By oh my dad - 13/02/2013 16:45 - United States - Florence

Today, I had to convince my dad that text lingo causes brain damage just to try to get him to stop. He actually believed me, and is telling everyone they have, or will receive brain damage soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 347

You deserved it 28 983

By K.. - 07/05/2011 17:38 - United States

Today, my dad demonstrated just how incredibly illiterate he is. He sent me a chain email about the awful lives of people with "Asparagus syndrome". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 848

You deserved it 3 723

By Anonymous - 01/10/2013 23:36 - United States - Tucson

Today, my mom blew her top when I casually mentioned that it's pretty well known that the story of Jesus is a retelling of older Persian and Egyptian stories. She then went on to yell at me that I wasted my money on college and "book learning". FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 370

You deserved it 10 724

By yeah okay then - 03/08/2012 23:50 - United Kingdom - Brentwood

Today, I decided to be nice and pay a social visit to my slightly deranged grandpa. I ended up politely sitting through two hours of him lecturing me on how he "invented the modern tap", then on how sex is an Illuminati invention to "give sluts the STDs they need to kill us all". FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 971

You deserved it 2 117

By StromyG2 - 24/10/2011 14:54 - United States

Today I had to listen to my father lecture me on all the potential dangers of Halloween. He has a speech for every holiday, every year. I'm 28 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 037

You deserved it 3 268

Good God, man…

By bloodyhell - 15/03/2020 15:05 - United States

Today, my dad tried to convert me, as he has numerous times before, and asked me why I was an atheist. After giving him a polite explanation and asking him if we could drop the subject, he nodded slowly and said, "You must be menstruating or something. You'll change your mind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 889

You deserved it 241

loserboii 11

Sunday 16 December 2012 3:28

On the 21st, play some music with loud bass on your speakers to make the house shake. Then see if he comes down screaming that the Mayans were right.

TipOfTheHat 10

Sunday 16 December 2012 3:32

Tell him to explain it again, through the use of interpretive dance

Comments

jterrell1993 4

Sunday 16 December 2012 22:34

If you actually did believe the prophecy then u deserve it

unknownfork 12

Monday 17 December 2012 4:58

Your dad is a cool guy. The Mayans never even predicted apocalypse. If you figured that out instead of listening to all the ignorant people who actually believed I would happen, then you wouldn't have to go through the 2 hour lecture.

tf5f89 7

Sunday 16 December 2012 22:57

The Mayans didn't even make a prediction. And even if they had, why believe it? It would have as much worth as a horoscope, that is to say, none.

iAmLauRawr 10

Monday 17 December 2012 3:38

To be fair though, your dad may have said it to prevent you from doing anything stupid to yourself. Just being cautious rather than being regretful in the near future, in case you were dumb enough to do something. Dont be so harsh on him, he cares about you. :)