Today, my mom invited my asshole cousin to my daughter's 10th birthday party, saying that this is the best time for me to apologize for having him imprisoned 3 years ago. He’s the same cousin who held my daughter hostage after the cops cornered him in a drug bust. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Family
Today, I came home to see my house trespassed, vandalized, and looted by my cousin, whom I have always hated, and his friends. As I get the cops to haul them to jail, he got kicked out from home for the Nth time and said my mom invited them. When I confronted my mom about it, she dismissed it saying, "He's family!" FML
Prison Break
Today, I went to my daughter's best friends birthday party, only to find my ex there, who is now sleeping with the mother, who has a fiancé in prison, who isn't going to be happy when he gets out. Most awkward kids birthday party ever. FML
Outcasts
Today, it appears that the cousin who burglarized my house and threatened to kill my wife, daughter, and me during a meth binge is more welcome at a family reunion than we are. We were assured last year by family that this wouldn't happen, because we are "good people who have wronged no one." FML
Family
Today, I realized my cousin is an asshole. A cousin that I was close to who got engaged. I was excited to be part of her wedding day, since she was a big part of mine. Months later, on Instagram, she was sharing reels from her bachelorette party. When I asked her why she didn't invite me, she said she forgot. FML
What did you do?
Today, I realized that my husband's family hates me for something I did 10 years ago. When I was 18. I’m so done apologizing for it. My daughter does not deserve to see her mother treated like this. FML
Birthday gift
Today, my mom thought it would be a good idea to bring my obnoxious ex to my birthday party. FML
Check yourself
Today, my mom talked to me and my brother about how great it was that our cousin was getting away from drugs and becoming sober, as he would have so many more opportunities opened up for him now. She explained all this while sitting on our patio, smoking a blunt. FML
The truth
Today, I finally told my dad that I hate his girlfriend. I said her daughter's a complete whore, and her son is annoying as fuck. Turns out they were in the house and within earshot, ready to throw me a birthday party. FML
Today, I got together a surprise party for my mom's birthday. I invited all her friends and her douchebag boyfriend who I don't get along with. When my mom got home, he took credit and got her friends to back him up with bribing. My mom said I'm selfish and horrible for not trying for her. FML
Wafting
Today, at a family gathering, I was talking to my uncle about my "awful neighbor who smokes pot all day while listening to shitty bro country, and tries to cover the smell with cheap incense." After a moment of awkward silence, I remembered my cousin, his son, is my neighbor. He was more offended by the fact that I'd insulted his taste in music. FML
Top comments
Echo 8802 14
I'M SORRY BUT YOUR MOM IS ******* RIDICULOUS.
arandomperson97 19
I would not allow them inside the house or on your property and have police waiting on scene. There’s a line and they have crossed it. I’m sorry, OP. Consider getting a restraining order.
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Comments (35)
Donut_Wizard 23
Is he the one who knocks?
dwight7476 11
She wrong you have every right to get him arrested it’s your job to protect your child
Lobby_Bee 18
Time to cut out your mom too.
RhiRhixo 4
sheeshh
thatslifeiguess7 16
So did you call the police
OnReceivingEnd 18
"F**k you, Mom. And you're no longer invited either."
tounces7 28
I think it's obvious you need to cut your mother out of your life at this point, she's clearly a ******* lunatic.
skippydoda 32
"I'm sorry they didn't shoot you"
cdaspirit 15
It’s not even your mom’s place to invite people to YOUR daughter’s birthday party. Please tell me you kicked your cousin out before they even stepped foot on your property
Gundel 22
I really hope, you did not let him come to your daughter's birthday.