Today, I worked as a cashier at a rummage sale at my church to...

By TheHeirofTime - 30/4/2016 00:38 - United States - Woburn

Today, I worked as a cashier at a rummage sale at my church to raise money for the homeless. My bag was stolen. FML

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TheHeirofTime Say more :

Why the fuck wouldn't I? Next time you go anywhere, don't bring anything with you. Going to a restaurant? Don't bring your wallet or it might get stolen!

Miscellaneous

All in the family

Crowded House

Age ain't nothing but a number

By Anonymous - 22/4/2009 00:17 - Canada

Today, I lost my $100 in cash that I had to use to pay my phone bill. As a result, my phone got cut off and I miss an important call for an apartment that I was looking at. When I went to work I heard my boss saying how lucky she was to find $100 in cash. FML

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By UnhappilyUnemployed - 16/6/2014 22:49 - United States - Madison

Today, I had a job interview. It went really well until I couldn't figure out how to open the slide door to get out of the room. FML

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By LadyNexus - 7/1/2015 03:54 - United States - Mohrsville

Today, I asked my boyfriend how he felt about me and he said, "You're the hottest seven I've ever met." FML

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By Anonymous - 28/10/2011 05:37 - United States

Today, while I was at work at a nursing home I was attempting to dress a woman for bed. She popped me a left hook and I had to ask the nurse to look at my jaw. After my nurse said I was okay she asked me to continue getting the woman dressed for bed. She hit me 5 more times. FML

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By Dino - 12/10/2012 06:36 - United States - Jacksonville

Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML

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By suze44 - 13/6/2011 14:22 - United States

Today, my father decided to "prepare" me for the real world by telling me that I'm ugly. FML

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By Shame - 19/9/2012 20:22 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit at me because I laughed at her idea of getting the Cullen family tree tattooed on her back. FML

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By Username - 9/3/2011 10:04

Today, my boyfriend told me he had to go pick up his family from the airport. I assumed he meant his parents. He apologized and said he meant his wife and child. They'd got their visa sooner than he'd thought. FML

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By chippuh - 26/4/2009 23:44 - United States

Today, my family and I drove to a mall an hour away. We split up, and I went into a store by myself. A little later, I get a call from my brother asking me where I am. They had already left to go home and didn't notice me missing from the car. They were already halfway home. FML

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By overthehorizon - 27/7/2009 17:25 - United States

Today, I thought I would surprise my dad by mowing our entire 2 acre lawn. When he got home, instead of being grateful like I had hoped, he yelled at me for cutting in vertical lines instead of horizontal. FML

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By whoevenncares - 4/9/2015 01:06 - United States

Today, I found my dog drinking out of the toilet. My daughter was next to him, also drinking from the toilet. FML

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By Nemesis2747 - 24/12/2009 06:09 - United States

Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML

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By Tal - 26/4/2009 15:14 - United States

Today, I got kicked in the face at a soccer game. Everybody clapped. FML

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By fuuuuuh - 20/7/2012 05:47 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, my family of five and I decided to have homemade sushi. We did not prepare the fish correctly, and now we all have excruciating food poisoning. The worst part? We only have one bathroom. FML

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By linren - 28/3/2009 18:40 - United States

Today, I was riding in the car with my new boyfriend. He had 'something serious' to tell me. He started to emotionally confess his addiction to masturbation. In detail. The drive was 2 hours long. FML

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By Anonymous - 30/10/2012 00:39 - United States

Today, I broke a nail at school. The edge kept getting caught on things, so I thought I could file it down by rubbing it on my jeans. Apparently it looked like I was doing something else, because I was called into the principal's office to discuss why "certain things" should be done in private. FML

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By Anonymous - 4/8/2014 23:04 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found out the hard way that no good girlfriend-boyfriend conversation ever started with, "Suppose I slept with your best friend..." FML

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By guest - 17/9/2015 04:16 - Argentina - Buenos Aires

Today, I got a text from my ex-boyfriend that said, "I love you." Thinking this meant he'd changed his mind about breaking up with me less than 24 hours before, I replied back excitedly. Turns out that was a text sent last weekend that didn't go through until now. What great timing. FML

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By B_McG - 25/11/2009 18:31 - Canada

Today, I found out that my mother has been purposely wrecking every relationship I've had since junior high because ''no one is good enough for her little girl''. FML

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By Anonymous - 29/11/2013 15:37 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I actually thought of faking my own death to get away from my girlfriend and her insane, overbearing family. FML

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By frustrated girlfriend - 29/12/2016 03:30 - United States - Raleigh

Today, my boyfriend and I spent all day preparing an amazing meal for my extended family, and then 3 hours before dinner his crazy mother forced him home because she felt "excluded". He's spent the past 3 days with her. There's no way for me to keep him and get rid of her. FML

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By Anonymous - 1/10/2010 05:43 - Canada

Today, in an attempt to spice up our relationship, I tied my boyfriend up and did a strip tease for him. I pulled my skirt down over my heels and tripped as I tried to step out of it. Not only did I pull a muscle in my leg but I elbowed him in the groin. So much for spice. FML

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By Anonymous - 18/12/2015 11:40 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, I woke up to noises from downstairs. I practically pissed my pants and called the cops. Turned out it was just my cat being a dickhead in the living room. FML

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By Anonymous - 27/8/2011 01:11 - United States

Today, I wrote "I love you" on my girlfriend's Facebook wall. She completely freaked out and accused me of being "too clingy" and that I'm starting to feel more like a stalker than a boyfriend. FML

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By Great. - 22/2/2013 22:32 - Brazil - Belo Horizonte

Today, I found an old toy that I gave to my daughter several years ago. It was still unopened, and long forgotten, so I decided to re-gift it to one of my friend's children. My daughter immediately remembered her "favorite" toy and started crying inconsolably. FML

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By Anonymous - 3/6/2016 19:46 - United States

Today, the police finally recovered my stolen car. All it took was a shootout and two people dying. FML

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By beya - 31/8/2009 22:05 - Canada

Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML

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By OhGreat - 30/4/2011 20:30 - United States

Today, my dad went through my room while I was out and threw away the "inappropriate pictures" that he found. They're the nudes I've been working on for art class. FML

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By JBone - 22/1/2009 07:02 - Canada

Today, I was making a smoothie. I didn't plug in the blender until after all the ingredients were inside. I pushed the 'on' button. It was still on when I went to plug it in. With no lid. FML

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By Anonymous - 25/1/2013 00:28 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I learned my dog had eaten a roll of vet wrap, which is like a long strip of bandage. I learned this when she tried to pass it in the yard today, and could only do so with my help. It seemed to never end. FML

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By pineapple456 - 16/2/2009 21:09 - United States

Today, I was hooking up with a girl in my apartment when I told her I didn't have a condom. She started laughing and upon realizing my look of confusion, said "Oh, you actually thought I was going to have sex with you?" FML

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By what the fuck?! - 2/12/2018 20:00 - United States - Hesperia

Today, I called my husband's mistress to confront her. Her husband answered and immediately began hitting on me. He asked what was taking me so long to join their circle and if I was as into dp as his wife is. I don’t know whether to vomit from rage or disgust. FML

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By ouch - 16/4/2013 16:17 - United States - Nashville

Today, for the fifth time since my parents got divorced, my father has decided he doesn't want to pick me up for his weekend because I'm "too responsible to have fun with." FML

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By petpeeeve - 11/3/2009 02:53 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time in our relationship and it was great. He drove me back to my house and walked me to the door, then instead of kissing me goodbye he patted me on the back. Twice. FML

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By Ackbar - 27/2/2009 15:18 - United States

Today, I fell out of the shower. It was still on. Bracing my fall, I reached into the toilet. It wasn't flushed. FML

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By Anonymous - 18/9/2019 14:00

Cats gonna cat

Today, I got a new mattress delivered to my house. Didn’t have it on the frame for more than 5 minutes before my cat had already pissed on it. FML

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By pinkrazrgirl247 - 3/7/2009 06:29 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML

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By mmmtortilla - 24/4/2012 14:03 - Spain - Portugalete

Today, while putting on a load of laundry, I squeezed the detergent bottle and it made a noise like a woman's orgasm. After laughing, I realised that I'm probably too immature to be washing my own clothes. FML

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By Average Lover - 27/10/2018 03:00

Today, my wife and I decided to go to an adult store and buy some toys to spice up the bedroom a bit. She wanted to buy a double-edged dildo so "we can use it together". I'm a guy. FML

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By anonymous - 26/6/2016 20:18 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was sick, so I went into work to see if I could get my shift covered, instead of just calling in. I ended up working an extra hour. FML

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Top comments

By kimise | 21

#6593398 - Saturday 30 April 2016 22:40

The OP is very correct.

By chuka81 | 27

#6593379 - Saturday 30 April 2016 21:57

The OP is very angry.

Comments

By Densetsu1000 | 10

#6593306 - Saturday 30 April 2016 20:24

How awful. I hope that action has been taken against whoever stole your belongings!

By michaelwm26 | 10

#6593311 - Saturday 30 April 2016 20:29

No good deed goes unpunished. Sorry op fyl.

By ssnow_fml | 20

#6593320 - Saturday 30 April 2016 20:38

Ironic

By False_Stupidity | 41

#6593327 - Saturday 30 April 2016 20:43

I guess that they then rummaged through the bag.

By annas3 | 10

#6593341 - Saturday 30 April 2016 21:05

wow people can be awful sometimes.

By SameerJain | 15

#6593362 - Saturday 30 April 2016 21:32

That's bad ...

By newclassics1999 | 3

#6593364 - Saturday 30 April 2016 21:33

how do 105 people think you deserve it

more4me | 27

#6593688 - Sunday 1 May 2016 6:12

just trollz and idiots. pay no attention!

By tosdyke | 16

#6593372 - Saturday 30 April 2016 21:44

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

TheHeirofTime | 19

#6593377 - Saturday 30 April 2016 21:55

Why the fuck wouldn't I? Next time you go anywhere, don't bring anything with you. Going to a restaurant? Don't bring your wallet or it might get stolen!

chuka81 | 27

#6593379 - Saturday 30 April 2016 21:57

The OP is very angry.

kimise | 21

#6593398 - Saturday 30 April 2016 22:40

The OP is very correct.

rosslynch553 | 16

#6593415 - Saturday 30 April 2016 23:19

Shittt

Enslaved | 36

#6593419 - Saturday 30 April 2016 23:29

Not that the OP deserved to get their stuff stolen (no one does) but comparing that event to going out to dinner is not the same. When you go out to a restaurant etc.., you're not leaving your personal items unintended. And people at a rummage sale are going through secondhand things. Maybe another cashier sold it to a person not realizing it wasn't a donated bag or maybe it was indeed a thief? There are people that are assholes and just because it's at a church doesn't mean much now a days.

zippocobalt6 | 14

#6593428 - Saturday 30 April 2016 23:52

You go OP!

tosdyke | 16

#6593489 - Sunday 1 May 2016 1:00

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

TheHeirofTime | 19

#6593499 - Sunday 1 May 2016 1:13

There was nothing that would be valuable to someone else in there. Being needy doesn't excuse thievery. My bag was also not unattended.

metalcrazed | 21

#6593511 - Sunday 1 May 2016 1:35

Do you always swear at people for giving thier option? Does do unto other as you would have them do to you sound familar?

DoomedGemini | 37

#6593580 - Sunday 1 May 2016 3:22

They're saying they deserve to get their shit to get stolen, can't exactly blame op for being angry.

CaityMandy | 10

#6593696 - Sunday 1 May 2016 6:21

Unattended, not unintended. Not sure if you made a typo

laden_swallow09 | 34

#6594730 - Monday 2 May 2016 15:34

Typo, or s/he's just stupid. Given the evidence shown here, I'm leaning towards the latter.

jbuckets_404 | 38

#6600390 - Sunday 8 May 2016 19:52

No, it's not a typo; "not unattended" means that she was always next to it and no, she's not stupid for initially trusting the honesty of people at a church rummage sale.

Given the nature of your comment, I'm leaning towards the latter, too....

By shana_starlight | 12

#6593414 - Saturday 30 April 2016 23:19

God don't want us to do good deeds or what! Fyl dear!

By ar2ag3on | 4

#6593425 - Saturday 30 April 2016 23:39

fyl but you have to be careful. it's hard to trust people even after don't good. hope it gets settled