Today, I went into hospital and was being treated by a really cute doctor. Not knowing that I was going to end up here, I put on novelty underwear this morning. Well, at least he found the little green glow-in-the-dark skulls amusing. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Dicking around
Today, while I was lying in bed in a hospital gown, a nurse came to check my vitals. I wasn't wearing any underwear and unbeknownst to me the bottom of my gown had been pulled up. My nurse laughed her head off while pointing this out to me as I covered myself, mortified after accidentally flashing her with my tiny dick. FML
Jim Henson lives
Today, I was at the gynecologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML
Today, I awoke after 4 hours of surgery. The male nurse taking care of me is cute, very cute. I'm trying my best to seem fine and dandy when he tells me that I can't eat anything before my next poop, adding, "And don't flush it, OK? I need to check." FML
Today, I spent the night in hospital. As soon as I was alone, I writhed and twisted in all directions in my attempts to pee in a bottle left precisely for that purpose. It was at that moment that the doctor, a good-looking guy, came in. My legs were spread wide and I was right in the middle of doing my business. FML
Today, I went to the gynecologist. In the waiting room they had decorative words that spelled out "Relax" and "Enjoy". FML
It's a wrap
Today, after my shift at the hospital ended, I happened to look into a full-length mirror. My new scrubs turned out to be see-through. Instead of my undies, everyone got a good look at my cellulite-ridden ass. Fan-fucking-tastic day to wear a thong. FML
Today, while working an early shift, I was dressing a wound on a gorgeous guy, when he laughed and pointed out some granny panties next to me on the floor. I guess I forgot to take yesterday's underwear out of my pants before putting them back on this morning. FML
Today, I had to go to the hospital. While I was there, my mom started hitting on a doctor. Later I saw them making out in the room next to me. FML
Classy
Today, I asked a guy to change into a gown for an X-ray exam. I asked him to leave his underwear on, everything else off. Apparently he was going commando, as he left skid marks on my table when the exam was over. FML
Junk reveal
Today, when I was visiting my dad in the ICU, the nurse was trying to help him sit upright and his dick and balls plopped out of his hospital gown for everyone to see. FML
Top comments
MyPupRox 2
Better than glow in the dark unicorns.
Muwahaha_fml 4
It could be worse-granny panties.
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Comments (131)
LyricaSilvan 30
Did you offer him a closer look? ;) But in all seriousness, I'm sure if he found them amusing, that's a positive sign. Think positive; maybe he thought a girl who would wear those must be pretty fun.
EwahWeeWah 21
There's nothing wrong with that, that's kind of cute.
EnderBash 15
79, You're* dumb