Today, I was pulling out of my driveway and was watching out for the flowers I'd just planted. I moved my head to look out of my window to avoid them, not realizing my window was up. I then hit my head, broke my nose and drove all over the flowers. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I ran into a car. I suffered a concussion and broke my nose. I wasn't driving. I walked right into it. It was parked. FML
Today, I parked, then opened my car door to get out, and somehow managed to practically knock myself out by banging my head on the frame, then on the car door that had slammed back into my forehead as I was still reeling from hitting the roof. A guy walking by asked if I was okay while trying not to laugh. FML
Today, while taking pills for a headache, I threw my head back to help get the pills down, and in the process, whacked it against the brick windowsill behind me. FML
Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML
Today, I gave the back door a slight nudge to make sure it was latched shut. Of course, it flew wide open, causing me to smash my face into the doorframe, fall out onto the back porch writhing in pain, and have blood pissing out of my face. FML
Today, I got a concussion and several staples in my head. As it turns out, watering flowers is much more dangerous than it might sound. FML
Today, I crashed my car. I saw a deer getting ready to run into the middle of the road, and I was very sleepy, so I panicked and slammed on the brakes, causing me to lose control of the car on the wet road. After I hit a tree, I realized that the deer was a plastic lawn ornament. FML
Today, I was practicing my golf swing on my front lawn. I took a swing and on the backstroke the golf club slipped out of my hands. Next thing I know, it hits a neighbor's window, shatters it, and goes right into their living room. FML
Today, I had an unexpected sneezing fit and drove my car through 2 trees and a fence. FML
Today, I leaned back and bumped into one of my mom's plants in the window. The good thing was that I caught it before it fell and shattered. The bad thing was that my mom likes to keep cactii in the window. I can still feel thorns I haven't managed to pluck out yet. FML
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Top comments
Some_guy 6
Today, I was well-rooted in the soil. I was soaking up some rays and generally enjoying being a flower, when some jackass backed over me with their car. FML.
WhyMe1_2_3 0
on the bright side, if your windows were/are clean enough to be mistaken for being down, your doing a kickass job at cleaning :D
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Comments (85)
mayday51 0
I doubt you could've broken your nose trying to look out of your window unless you flung your head at it. You must care very much about your flowers. :P
dang_fml 0
you must have been trying to thrust your head out of the window pretty hard if you ended up breaking your nose...
26242 0
If you had gotten any farther on the road I imagine you would've done more damage. I thank the higher power that sacrificed your face and flowers.
peace_steph 0
wow. #2's a bitch.
bipolarchipmunk 0
sea cucumbers have the ability to liquefy their entire body mass, so they don't run into problems like this.
I2OI3 0
I'm sorry that happened to you. That's no fun. I probably wouldn't have posted that on my site though. My site is similar to FML but it's like only funny FML's..
Casualt1234 0
#7 and #2 read my mind. Using proceeded out of context = automatic YDI. I'm sick of that word. It's poor grammar. Also, who cares? Terrible FML. There are people with real problems out there.
ItsJustMe1616 26
The word proceeded isn't even in this FML. I don't understand lol
ShadowMystika 0
Wow, you turn your head pretty rapidly if you can force it against the window hard enough to break your nose.... must have been some precious flowers.
jaybrown 0
ahh...ahh...ah-STUPID!
Daysgoby 0
#3 shut up.