Today, I was out and was having a wonderful time. At exactly midnight, I get a call from my father. He's divorcing my mother. He's also going to Florida with his mistress for the weekend. If that wasn't the best news ever, he'd love if I found an apartment to live in ASAP. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I found out my parents are divorcing and my mom is moving out. I'm 11 weeks pregnant. Breaking the news should be fun. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed. I was about to call my parents and tell them we're getting married, but they called me first to announce they're getting a divorce. FML
Today, my dad, who lives hours away, called and told me he was getting married. Today. As in this evening. Guess I'm not invited. FML
Today, I found out my newly-divorced father is now going to marry my girlfriend's mother. Tough situation here. FML
Today, my father got married. He left me a voicemail to tell me all about it. FML
Today, I returned home from my honeymoon and met my dad for coffee. He told me he's been seeing someone and he's so happy. It's my new mother-in-law. They moved in together during my wedding weekend. FML
Today, I found out my mother had remarried, and that I was getting a stepfather and stepbrother. However, I found out about it 30 minutes before we left to pick them up from the airport, and also found out that I'm losing my bedroom. FML
Today, my parents told me, after 30 years of marriage, that they are getting a divorce. I went to my boyfriend's apartment because I needed some comfort. While sobbing to him, he decided to dump me on the spot because my reaction to the news was "immature" and he wants an "adult" relationship. FML
Today, my dad wants a divorce. I can either stay with my wine-loving mom or move 300 km away with my dad. FML
Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
mrda 0
Problem: Mistress Solution: Run over the mistress. Problem: Solved
Jewelofagal 2
Your response: "I'm not going to alter my living arrangements on the fly so it will be more convenient for you and your mistress to set up your love nest ASAP. It will take some time. You will need to be patient and remember that you're supposed to be my father and look out for my well-being. "
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (57)
WheezyThePenguin 0
Ohhhhh shit. I'm so sorry.
RuralNinja 0
Do you mean find him an apartment for him to live, or an apartment for you to live because your parents didn't sign a prenup?
shanisdaman 0
man..ur dad literally sux. i hope ur mom gets a hot new hubby who's really rich, and u should work hard in uni to become really rich. then he'll crawl back to u for the money when his mistress ditches him for another richer man. then u can throw a 100 dollar bill on his small ass penis and tell him to walk away
khriss_khriss 7
Lmao thats a good one haha
Psychomaze 0
... So... do you currently live with parents to cut expenses, or were you 'asked' to find an apartment for Him in Florida? If you were asked to find a place for him, then may I make a suggestion of making 'Pine Hills' which is a few blocks west of Down Town Orlando (near Disney?) his home? It's dirt cheap, there's always space, and it's nick named 'Crime Hills' for a damn good reason.
Grangoire 0
Your mom & dad's relationship (or lack of one) is THEIR business. expecting them to stay together for your benefit is quite selfish. Especially if you are an adult. And if you ARE an adult, you SHOULD get your own place and stop moochimg off your poor parents. Why can't your parents have a wonderful time for once? YDI
skyttlz 32
it would be worse if this was on new yes eve
hersactually 0
op, how old are you? :(
atishe24 9
That sucks :( I hope you get through it ok.