Today, I was helping a customer find some shoes. When I brought her a size, she got a phone call. I motioned to the shoes and mouthed, "Bigger size" so I didn't interrupt her. She yelled, "Give me a fucking minute," and stormed out. About 5 minutes later, I realized she'd stolen the shoes. FML
Also, (not enough room to mention this in the FML) it wasn't a casual phone call, she was having a very heated (and obviously fake I realized afterwards) argument with some guy about how she was or was not just at some restaurant with another guy. She was screaming and cussing, the whole shabang! It was, in hindsight, a very effective distraction