Intimacy: Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend, when my upstairs...

By Anonymous - 16/03/2013 06:19 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend, when my upstairs neighbor decided to take the longest piss known to man. He moaned the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 667

You deserved it 4 832

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Same thing different taste

By edwinduarte1 - 13/09/2010 06:49 - France

Today, I noticed that the walls of my apartment are ridiculously thin, when I heard my neighbor slowly walk up the stairs, slam the bathroom door, lift the toilet cover, take a pee and end with a nice "AAHH." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 189

You deserved it 3 306

Cursed buildings

By investing in earplugs - 23/02/2022 05:59

Today, sick of the unfiltered noise we hear from our neighbours in our upstairs apartment, as we're above their fence line, we signed the lease on an apartment downstairs. While I was downstairs, my partner clomped upstairs, opened the bathroom door, and took a piss. I heard EVERYTHING. FML

I agree, your life sucks 769

You deserved it 306

By TooShortToCleanThat - 20/03/2015 03:22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to show off one of his favorite skills: Peeing on my ceiling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 448

You deserved it 3 750

By anon - 15/09/2012 05:35 - United States - Rocklin

Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 418

You deserved it 2 724

By litterbox_girl - 19/08/2009 01:13 - United States

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house while his plumbing was being redone. I really had to pee, but the toilet wasn't working, so I peed in his cat's litterbox. His cat got defensive, and started attacking me while I peed. My boyfriend walked in and saw the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 802

You deserved it 71 133

By maniac11 - 11/10/2012 00:58 - United States

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 502

You deserved it 6 583

Mood breaker

By Anonymous - 01/10/2021 06:30 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, I was having sexy time with my girlfriend when she said she needed to pee. She came back 5 minutes later and started talking about how she hasn't seen her best friend in ages and misses her. Needless to say, I couldn't get the man downstairs back up when we continued. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 074

You deserved it 184

By Anonymous - 07/06/2016 07:45

Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 889

You deserved it 1 234

By GasAttack - 07/09/2009 13:32 - Canada

Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 454

You deserved it 8 529

By Anonymous - 28/11/2011 03:00 - United States

Today, I let my boyfriend sleep over at my house for the first time. Upon arriving, he tossed his stuff on the floor and said "I gotta take a piss, where's your shower?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 624

You deserved it 4 155

BountyBass 13

Saturday 16 March 2013 11:44

Moan louder

iLike2Teabag 27

Saturday 16 March 2013 11:49

Hey, sometimes relieving yourself can feel better than sex.

Comments

goose12321 11

Saturday 16 March 2013 14:26

No way.... He didn't?!

noelasis94 18

Saturday 16 March 2013 14:28

He probably thought he took part in setting the mood, good for him.

xcalabrese3x 6

Saturday 16 March 2013 15:21

Hey, maybe he wanted to join in on the fun

cornyrob 33

Saturday 16 March 2013 15:24

You shouldn't've given your neighbor gonorrhea.

dogger2001 6

Saturday 16 March 2013 15:26

I don't think he was pissing....

fksfsdhfsdfh 26

Saturday 16 March 2013 15:38

Im so lucky that my walls are soundproofed!

upallnight11 19

Saturday 16 March 2013 15:49

Hey, everyone has the right to pee, if you like it or not.

Inked0803 12

Saturday 16 March 2013 16:31

Twat swatted by your neighbor

peachykeenLNG 13

Saturday 16 March 2013 18:53

Is your ceiling made of cardboard??

slooby_fml 25

Saturday 16 March 2013 19:06

A league of their own

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I've been working on a novel for the past six months, and what would have been mid-way through, I accidentally said the main character's name instead of my boyfriend's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 583

You deserved it 16 950

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 088

You deserved it 18 231

The Top

Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 603

You deserved it 7 113

Today, a tree fell on our 3-month-old family car. Today, I also learned that my husband never insured it. It's probably scrap, and we still have to pay it off for the next 5 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 054

You deserved it 563

Today, my best friend and I went to the movies. There was a hot cashier, so I thought it would be cool to talk in a British accent to try and be sexy. I walked up and started talking when he interrupted me and said in a very heavy British accent, "I know you're faking. You can stop now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 007

You deserved it 60 617

Today, my boss had a lengthy and obnoxiously egocentric conversation with a colleague. After she left across the office, I stood up, looked over at my colleague, and made a sarcastic "shooting myself in the head" gesture. I saw my boss staring at me over a cubicle wall as I turned around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 882

You deserved it 21 663

Today, after a badly misjudged hand signal, I accidentally hit my boss in the face instead of high-fiving her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 219

You deserved it 3 162

Today, a week after spending most of my paycheck on a down-payment and rent on a new apartment, I found out the "landlord" I paid was a scammer. Turns out the real owner was away on vacation, and he'd stolen most of her stuff before showing me the place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 791

You deserved it 1 391

Same thing different taste

Cursed buildings

Mood breaker

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