Today, I was driving home. I desperately needed the bathroom, so I was speeding a little bit. A cop pulled me over and gave me hell. He said he'd heard my story a hundred times and didn't believe me. I couldn't hold it and ended up marinating in my own piss while he ran my plates. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, while driving home I had to pee really bad, so I speeded up to get home quicker. I got pulled over for speeding and peed my pants. The cop, assuming I was drunk, made me take a sobriety test. I had to walk a straight line with piss all over my pants at 2:00 in the afternoon. FML
Today, I drove 100 miles from my parents' house to mine. I had only a few miles left when I realized I really had to pee. I didn't want to pull over somewhere when I was so close to home, so I sped up. A cop pulled me over a block from my house. I started to sob, and ended up peeing myself. FML
Today, I was pulled over for speeding. The cop asked if I had a reason for going so fast. I panicked and said, “I have to poop.” He followed me home with lights on, just to make sure I made it. FML.
Today, I was on a long road trip and I really had to pee. With no rest stop for miles and night having fallen, I decided to pull over on the side of the highway and pee in a fast food cup. A cop knocked on the window to see if everything was okay, while I was mid-squat. FML
Today, a cop car was tailing me. I was scared, and trying to avoid any tickets, I drove straight through a huge pothole rather than swerving to avoid it. The cop pulled me over and insisted I was intoxicated, because, "anybody in their right mind would've dodged that pothole." FML
Today, while driving my son and his friend home, I was so frantic to pee, I was bouncing up and down in my seat. I stopped and ran into a store but it was too late. There was a line and I made it 11 seconds. I was radiating heat from the humiliation of walking past dozens of people after peeing my pants. I even apologized. FML
Today, I was smoking while driving. A cop pulled me over and asked if I knew what I did wrong. I thought he could smell the tobacco, so I decided to just admit it. As it turns out, I was going well over the speed limit. FML
Today, I got pulled over for a broken taillight. When I rolled down the window, the cop asked me if I was smoking crack. When I told him I didn't do drugs, he didn't believe me since he could detect a foul odor coming from my car. I'd just passed gas big time. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I was driving home from work when I saw a cop come up behind me. Nervous about my expired license, I kept checking in my rear view mirror. In turn since I wasn't paying attention, I ran a stop sign. Needless to say the cop pulled me over and gave me 2 tickets. FML
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Top comments
Blackhawk706 23
Next time just stop at a gas station
jaspinkgrl01 18
Well...did he still give you the ticket?
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Comments (61)
fohfuu 9
Doesn't matter if you really needed a pee. What if you hit someone? What if you caused someone to hit another car? The safety of other people is way more important. If you needed a pee that badly, find another way.
swash984 22
Speeding isn't the same as reckless driving. The flow of traffic in my area is generally 7-8 miles over the speed limit. If he was riding people's ass, or jumping in front of people then op would be causing issues. I believe you can go over the speed limit and still be a safe driver...
9a_1z 12
He was speeding enough to be noticed by the police and a desperate need for the bathroom must be distracting. So many accidents and fatalities happen on the roads each day, I'd take it as a lesson and pull over somewhere safe instead of risking it next time.
ohSNAPyall 27
Marinating in piss? At least you weren't stewing in poo.
trevorr_16 25
Maybe next time you should stop somewhere unless you happen to live in a completely isolated area or on a mountain.
Nina825 21
I wonder his reaction afterwards :p did he give any tickets?
MagnusDeus 24
Well, according to a statistic I once heard from a friend, that is the most commonly used excuse. I probably would've used something else. Not that you deserved it.
Shannon98 16
Was the cop at least a little bit sympathetic after your incident
limegreenpoopie 31
You can always stop somewhere...
youngsparrow 21
Or if you're too stubborn to go before you leave, sport some adult diapers lol, at least if you wear them you won't have to worry about speeding home and potential encounters with the cops.
worldclassrager 41
Couldn't just pull over? I mean that's pretty logical...right?
beeferjay 34
I can tell youre a woman because a man would have gotten out and peed on a bush. no offense to women... I looove women