Today, I was babysitting a 5-year-old girl and we were coloring. She made me a card that was very sweet, so I smiled. She looked at me and went "Don't smile, your smile is really scary." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was babysitting my nephew and we decided to color together. He drew a picture of someone who looked dead, almost zombie-like, while everyone else looked pretty normal. When I asked who it was, he said in a serious, scary voice, "It's you." FML
Today, while babysitting a girl, I told her to be quiet so she wouldn't wake her little brother. In reply, she told me that she would kill me, wake her brother up to show him my dead body, then draw all over my face. I'm stuck with her for another two hours. FML
Today, I realised how damn creepy I am because I get nervous and smile when someone looks at me, and no it's not one of those smiles you'd love looking at, it's a smile straight out of a horror movie. I made a bunch of children run away. FML
Today, the 6 year old girl I was babysitting asked me, "Why are you so ugly? Are you an alien? Because aliens are about as ugly as you are." FML
Today, while babysitting, I brought over some colouring-in sheets as an activity. I said that I should bring some Christmas-themed ones for next time. The little girl then turned to me and said "If there is a next time." I've been put on probation by an 8-year-old. FML
Today, I was babysitting a one year-old. She'd just learned how to say yes, so if you asked her ANYTHING, she'd say yes. I asked her if she liked vegetables and she said, "Yes!" Then I asked her if I was pretty. She looked at me and said, "NO." FML
Today, at work, a little girl was misbehaving. Her dad told her that she would look like me when she grows up. The little girl look horrified while Daddy laughed and kept reassuring her he was "just kidding." FML
Today, I was babysitting a six year old girl, when I saw a huge spider on the wall. I screamed and told her to stay back. Instead, she walked up to the spider, squished it, and told me to stop being such a baby. FML
Today, a little girl from my Sunday School class approached me and told me she had a stomach ache. She seemed very upset and her face was discolored so I took her to the nurse. While we were walking out the door, I looked down and saw a half-eaten crayon on the floor. That'll do it. FML
Today, while out walking with my son in a stroller, a couple passed by and the girl smiled sweetly at him. It made me really happy, until we'd passed and I heard her say, "What? You're supposed to smile at babies, even if they look weird." FML
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Top comments
bnomis 0
Aww, what a precious little bitc- I mean girl. I love kids, but I couldn't eat a whole one.
HurriKaty 4
BRB, lolling forever. I'm sorry, that's hilarious. Don't take it too seriously, 5 year olds think tons of things are scary.
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Comments (78)
xxx1234 0
bahahaah. oh man.
biedrzycki_love 0
Lmao #12, 24 & 26! :] [^-^] You could always smile with your mouth closed, or with a pleasant expression on your face. And if that doesn't work then you can always just paper-bag it. :D note2self: orange is a very bright color. :[
a_z_0_9__fml 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
shineyourlight_x 0
hahahahahaha...i'm sure your smile isn't freaky though. i work with kids and they perceive things different than we do because they're too little.
nodbor 11
why, do you look like Charles Manson when you smile?
sameoldsameold 0
did you say to the kid: your mom dug it when we put your pre-tense in a turkey baster and made you.
Zir 0
#4, you mean they haven't learned to tell white lies yet? Cmon, truth comes out of a child's mouth
littlesnickeroo 0
LOL i've been in the worse mood PMSing the whole freaking day. i'm just on here reading FMLs and the first time i actually laughed was after i read this. HAHA
carmel 0
kids are so cruel.
carmel 0
#2 scares me. #17 lmao