Transportation: Today, I picked up my 4-year-old daughter from day care. As we're...

By reb2632 - 29/05/2009 20:13 - United States

Today, I picked up my 4-year-old daughter from day care. As we're driving home, a butterfly lands on the windshield. Just as my daughter comments on how pretty the butterfly is, I turned a corner and accidentally hit the windshield wipers and smeared the pretty butterfly across the windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 069

You deserved it 12 729

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Gone bird

By Whoops - 06/06/2011 01:44 - United States

Today, while driving with my three year-old, I was showing her the different kinds of birds. I pointed out a bright red cardinal perched in a row of hedges. She squealed as it took flight, so happy to see such a brightly colored birdie fly. Until it hit my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 731

You deserved it 4 530

By Anonymous - 27/06/2014 20:22 - Spain - Valencia

Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 290

You deserved it 9 373

By andrea99 - 03/10/2010 09:35 - United States

Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 657

You deserved it 3 415

Act of god

By Anonymous - 05/04/2023 00:00

Today, I purchased a new car. On the drive home, gusts of wind blew up debris and pebbles and caused little chips in the paint and small chips on the windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 727

You deserved it 85

By Wellthisishawkward - 14/08/2015 22:40 - United States

Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 732

You deserved it 2 891

By Username - 13/05/2011 08:13

Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 848

You deserved it 6 719

By houdinette - 22/11/2013 23:14 - Sweden - Norrk?ping

Today, while driving home, I looked in the rear-view mirror and saw that my three-year-old daughter had managed to get out of her seat and had crawled to the back window. I pulled over and strapped her in again. Five minutes later she was back at the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 209

You deserved it 5 960

Clever

By FMLTIMESTWO - 10/06/2009 04:36 - United States

Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 555

You deserved it 61 960

Throw the bill at the kid. Do it.

By Deadmeat - 12/09/2017 04:29

Today, I was really excited that I'd made it the two weeks I'd borrowed my mother-in-law's new car without putting a scratch on it. I got off work to discover a customer's child throwing rocks in the parking lot. They cracked the windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 033

You deserved it 265

By gbabyy - 22/11/2009 03:25 - United States

Today, my daughter was playing outside. I was watching her from the window, and I saw her pick up a dead bird. I ran outside to grab her. As I picked her up and started scolding her, she tried to scratch my face. In the attempt, her hand went straight into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 744

You deserved it 6 889

anglcdvl89 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:45

I can just hear a little girl go "Look how pretty the butterfly i--WHATDIDYOUDOOOOO???" FbothyourL because now your daughter probably thinks your a monster.

xkonstantine125x 7

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:38

Lol...I'm still laughing..oh god this is great

Comments

whobutme23 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:52

Blame it on the car, she's 4, she doesn't have to know you did it.

Spl4sh_fml 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 3:38

What did she do after that?

blackhak25 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 5:12

Oopsy!! She was probobly mad!

moonlit_manga 0

Saturday 6 June 2009 0:30

Hahahahahaha! Omg.... #5 jeanniner yes you are the only one who thinks it's stupid, you sour old hag. >:) --fox

lebatsirhc 0

Tuesday 23 June 2009 9:40

): Poor girl.

Shyman4ever 0

Wednesday 1 July 2009 18:31

Do you accodently hit the windshield wiper handle even when there isn't a butterfly??? It's weird that all FML's are a coincidence.

Adriennerox211 0

Thursday 2 July 2009 7:48

R.I.P butterfly :[ Imagine frum the butterfly: Today, I was flying around and came across a car with a little girl in the back. I decided to give her a little 'show' so I landed on the windshield. After hearing a comment from the child, I immediately get smashed and killed. I am now in butterfly heaven. FML :P