By jillie minaj - United States
Today, I'm accused of vandalizing a cop car during a night of partying, and in so doing, violating my parole. While talking with my lawyer, who I spent all my savings on, I said he could hire better than his hideous secretary. Turns out she's his wife. I think I'm now more screwed than ever. FML
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By  jjessen  |  20

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.. Show it anyway

  syley  |  5

Op insluts his lawyer's secretary, turns out to be lawyer's wife. op basically pissed his lawyer off by calling his wife/secretary (unknowingly) "hideous"

  MochiDango  |  4

I'm just curious why OP would bring the secretary into it, I could understand if she sucked at her job or was nasty to people but she questioned her attorney because his secretary wasn't good looking? It seems a little shallow to me but I also don't know OP or the secretary.

  Insane_Tea  |  15

#17 Have you seen a T.V. program about prisons? Both male and female are scary as shit. Those offenders of society are the real deal. Have you seen some of those women? They're seriously scary as hell.


24- I know but does the soap being dropped still have any reaction out of the women? I mean some of them look manly as hell but they can't really do something to a woman bending over? Slap their ass maybe but i hope to god that they wouldn't be like... uhh.. how to say this without sounding like a perv... Would they insert any body parts in the woman's vagina? I've never heard stories of bad shower accidents in women jails.


My mom works at the male state prison in Florida. She hates working at the women's because women are atrocious in jail. More fights, more problems, more attitude, more idiotic women. In women prisons, other women become "slaves" to other women. It's the way it is

  rubberduckie94  |  13

59 you are exactly spot on your call. Women are far worse then men in situations like this. Op don't forget white underwear and tee shits otherwise you will be commando under your jump suit. Gross.

  Hockeyboy4280  |  18

I agree with 24, some of those prison ladies could beat the shit out of me. Those are not women, they are men... I've seen UFC and Boxing matches less violent and brutal than those cows on "Lockup". I thought I was a tough kid for playing a contact sport, Jesus, I wouldn't last 3 seconds in a hardcore women's jail. So 17, maybe "don't drop the soap" doesn't apply to FEMALES, but some other hardcore shit still goes down.

By  Dajucy1  |  7

Its not like you could've trust a lawyer to begin with

  MochiDango  |  4

5- I'm guessing you're also one of those people who hate on cops because they're doing their jobs? Jesus, your comment just made you seem really ignorant so take a step back and think "if I did some stupid crap and got in trouble with the law, would I really want to represent myself in court and guarantee a prison sentence?"

  etoilenuit  |  15

It's funny she's judging someone on their looks, when someone could judge her on stupidity. Stupidity makes you a bigger loser than someone who isn't attractive..

  xk75  |  4

Bc the op's an ass who deserves to have the book thrown at him or her. And the "savings" the op spent was probably around three fifty.

  22cute  |  17

Sounds like Op was trying to hit on her attorney and it backfired big time, to me!

68- it takes at least $3000-5000 retainer hire an attorney.

By  doodlecloud  |  26

What is wrong with you? Even if she wasn't his wife, why would you just insult her like that? If that's just the kind of small-talk you make then, combined with already being on parole, you seen like I nasty piece of sucks that you're being accused of something you apparently haven't done but I can't help but feel this may just be karma for a load of other crap...