Today, I lost all of my male friends at work. Why? The new girl has my same interests and a prettier face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to a female friend of mine, because I thought they would get along. Apparently they get along better than I expected; she dumped me for the other girl. FML
Today, I went downtown with my friends. A group of guys came up to us and started hitting on everyone except me. Then one of them said, "Do you girls hang out with her to make yourselves look better?" FML
Today, I walked into work and overheard three of my female coworkers talking and laughing about how ugly my face is, and how they’re sorry for whoever has to marry me. They went on to name the coworkers they actually would sleep with. I’m 25 and I've still never had a girlfriend. Thanks for the self-esteem boost. FML
Today, my boss fired me because I look like her ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, there's a new freshman at my school that looks exactly like me. Whenever we see her, my friends shout "Twinzies!" I don't have anything against her, but I'm bummed because I'm a male senior. FML
Today, my boss told me I got my new job because she rejected candidates that seemed "too confident" or "too pretty." FML
Today, one of my female friends decided she wants a relationship with my ex. I told her I was fine with it because we've been apart for years and have been friends ever since. She then made him chose between being friends with me and having her as a girlfriend. I just lost two of my few friends. FML
Today, I gave up trying to make any friends at my job as a firefighter. I'm the lone female, and am the subject of gossip with the older men. Anyone I try to befriend ends up hitting on me, while others won't even talk to me because their wives are jealous. FML
Today, at work, a table of girls complained to the manager about me. The complaint? "He's not hot enough to work here. We want a sexy server." The manager agreed with them and sent me home. I might lose my job because of a table of shallow women. FML
Today, I made the mistake of uttering the phrase "I’m not like other girls" at work when discussing how I prefer staying in and reading over going out to a bar. Now none of the other girls in the office will talk to me and are calling me a "pick-me." FML
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Top comments
littlekellilee 45
If this girl has the same interests as you, make friends with her. Then everyone can hang out together.
daffodilsea 11
Don't let it get you down OP! They're not worth your friendship if that's the case.
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Comments (91)
T552 12
You don't want them to be your friends. Sounds like they're trying to get into a girls pants rather than genuine friendship. Soon they'll be running back to you, crying that they got "friendzoned" and attempt to get into your pants again.
cjfred 13
They obviously weren't your friends in the first place, then. Friends don't bail on friends when better eye candy comes along.
jerome74 1
seems to me you were flirting with them. this is not friendship. just do you and they will eventually start talking to you again super pretty girls are a pain stuck on themselves.
iwadasn 33
It seems that the guys were superficially pretending to be friends with her in the hopes that it would get them into her pants, and then they ditched the "friendship" they never actually cared about in the first place as soon as something better came along.
Aimeejasmine 15
Wow 27, you'd probably blame someone for getting in the way of a bullet too with that attitude
1dvos_grl3 21
I don't think they were interested in friendship in the first place OP...
SadSouthernBell 18
I have so many questions about this post. If you were playing "princess of the clan" and flirtatiously friendzoned everybody while leading them on, then YDI. I'm not saying that happened, but it's possible. :-(
ChibiChibi_fml 28
The way you phrased that makes it sound like if a girl is friends with a group of guys she needs to be dating at least one of them. The fact is that people flirt with their friends almost as much as they flirt with people they actually want to screw. Hell there are some people who just have naturally flirty personalities and genuinely don't realize that they are flirting with you in the first place. This isn't a YDI for any reason beyond the fact that the OP apparently can't tell the difference between "friends" and simply "coworkers". These people are not her friends. They are coworkers and they will tolerate her until they have better options. There are people like that at every job.
Sergius_fml 7
Saw this in the moderate section and said yes yay
lizlafluv98 10
"Friends"
worldclassrager 41
Okay so maybe you two could be good friends and hell maybe start dating...there's room for everyone
lvg_fml 10
They are not your friends. They are scumbags
Bragi 12
Newsflash, OP, they weren't your friends. I won't call you an idiot for thinking they were, but I hope you learned.