By nocongratsneeded - 04/11/2015 03:23 - United States - Bloomfield Hills
I agree, your life sucks
29 029
You deserved it
4 367
nocongratsneeded tells us more.
Hi all, this is the OP. Obviously, he's my ex, even though he doesn't seem to realize it yet to judge by the texts and phone calls. To give a little more background, we'd been together for almost three years. We were talking about moving in together (but not getting married, I've seen too many of my friends get divorced already). To really prove that the universe hates me, he and I were still using condoms, because I am that freaked out about pregnancy and I can't take hormonal BC. This is the first time ever I've had one break. I'm sure I'm going to catch a lot of flak for this, but I have scheduled an abortion for the end of this week. It's not a human or a potential one to me, it's just a burden and reminder that former relationship was based on a big fat lie. Plus, being pregnant makes me even more anxious than the thought of being pregnant ever did, and I was full-on tokophobic before. Every time I think about having my body being overtaken by some disgusting little alien creature, my heart starts pounding and I get dizzy. I don't know how many times I've thrown up on cue just thinking about it, and it's not from morning sickness. I also really, really, really dislike babies, contrary to my ex's assumptions. I had one shoved at me when I was a teenager, and I nearly dropped it because everything about it terrified me. I don't think it's a good idea to just hope that those maternal hormones kick in and make me suddenly like kids when I haven't since as long as I can remember. So...no congratulations needed, and no pro-life or pro-adoption rants, either. If you'd find it in your heart to suck it up and make the best of this situation, good for you. The best situation for me is to put everything about this horrible experience behind me as soon as possible.
Top comments
Comments
Wow, that's technically sexual assault/rape as he purposefully hid things from you which you would not consent to if you knew. I would leave him ASAP.
sailorarctic
22
abortion. honestly. I've had one and am also pregnant now so I've been on both sides. i have a phobia of manmade objects being inside my body so it has been very hard and I've needed tons of support to make it through the exams and tests that have to be done and it's only going to get harder when I actually go into labor. IV's trigger a panic attack. the termination on the other hand was just taking a few pills and waiting for nature to do the rest. i'd definitely seek counseling for your decision especially if your phobia is as intense as mental breakdown mode.
ohmyrosie
14
Geez, OP I'm so sorry. I hope only the best could come out of this pregnancy for you. All your fears might be put to the side and that child could be the best thing that's ever surprised you in your life. best of wishes going your way girl.
I thought if you got a vasectomy no cum comes out
No, it just kills the sperm. The fluid's still there.
What I don't get is why didn't she get surgery to prevent babies. Why make the man dating her do it. I can see it now Can I go Out with you? Only if you have a vasectomy
Please go and read up on these procedures for women. They're not provided for us unless we're above a certain (unreasonably high) age, and preferably already have children. It also affects us pretty severly, it changes the way our body works for the rest of our lives, whereas a vasectomy hardly changes anything at all. You sound ignorant when you bring this up without bothering to check the facts.
"All you chicks love babies." ******* Christ, the dude doesn't even see you as an individual, he sees all women as a homogenous group. Wish this FML would get tattooed on his forehead and serve as a warning for all women he may come across. He's a piece of shit, and I am so sorry you had to experience this.
You should have him charged.
tkeeton46
17
I think you're making the right decision, I personally don't see it as a child until the end of the first trimester and possibly the 4th, and you were lied to and that's how this even happened
<p>He's a douche. The thing about women getting their tubes tied is that it's hard to. Most doctors won't unless the woman has a couple of kids or is 35 and older.</p>
you do whatever it is that you need to do. even if it's abortion. that is YOUR choice and **** anyone that says differently. I hope all goes well for you. and I'm glad to hear that he's your ex. If he keeps harassing you, punch him in the balls.
Keywords
The Top
I agree, your life sucks
10 008
You deserved it
21 832
I agree, your life sucks
1 590
You deserved it
215
The Top
I agree, your life sucks
1 018
You deserved it
133
I agree, your life sucks
27 814
You deserved it
2 778
I agree, your life sucks
8 328
You deserved it
53 970
I agree, your life sucks
11 661
You deserved it
41 002
I agree, your life sucks
25 459
You deserved it
3 020
I agree, your life sucks
14 667
You deserved it
832
Honestly whatever you did as a response, he deserved it. Relationships should be built on trust not lies. FYL
Good for you, OP! Not every woman has that maternal instinct, and if you didn't have the drive to have kids before you got pregnant, chances are slim it will kick in after. You have done the responsible thing by not bringing a life into the world that you do not want. Two things I would like to mention: copper IUD may be a good option for you. It lasts 10 years and is non-hormonal. I've had mine for three years and it really is no-maintenance birth control that actually works. Second, no matter how sure you are that abortion is right, it can bring up some psychological distress after. If you find yourself getting depressed, please know this is normal. It may be beneficial to seek short-term counseling afterwards. Hell, just what your boyfriend put you through could warrant a few sessions. Its incredibly helpful. Good luck in all you do! <3