Today, I learned a few things. One: friends are assholes. Two: under no circumstance do you close your eyes when they ask you to. Three: getting kicked in the balls hurts a lot. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Battery
Today, at work, I was talking to a colleague about what the worst pain he ever experienced was. He said his was being bitten by a dog, and I said I didn't know. Next thing, I was kicked in the balls from a behind by another work colleague. She said, "What about that?" I agreed, it was. FML
Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML
Today, on the way to work, I was punched in the balls by a complete stranger. FML
Today, I had to listen to my best friend explain how to properly unstick one's balls from one's leg. I'm a girl. FML
Right in the nuts
Today, I thought it would be fun and nice to pick my little brother up, but no, he accidentally kicked me in the balls. Twice. FML
Fight like hell
Today, I learned that kicking an armed mugger's ass is something that only happens in movies, and that brass knuckles are really fucking painful. FML
Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML
The gang
Today, I went to my friend's house to celebrate her birthday but 3 of them ganged up on me and molested my arse cheeks. Later, someone found a wooden plank and spanked me hard. There was also a BB gun and my arse was the target. I have been a social outcast all my life, and these are my only friends, but I'm always hit. FML
Today, I learned that you can pierce your balls. However, sitting on a thumbtack is not the best way to find this out. FML
Pissed
Today, my friend whacked me in the family jewels while I was washing my hands in our college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML
Top comments
Wizardo 34
1. You're gullible as hell 2. Never trust any of your guy friends - guys are assholes 3. Ice them balls brother.
olpally 33
After you're done being in pain, kick them in the balls. Bastards.
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Comments (87)
ball_is_life 2
*****es
Nyx_fml 23
Uhm... barbies? Enzymes? Waffles? You have to be a bit more specific here. Just write the damn word.
wanderingshopper 13
And yet you're still calling them friends. Hope you don't have enemies too!
Poetaster 10
I do hope you stood there not flinching and grinned wickedly....
HeartOfLead 24
Look on the bright side: this sounds like a new viral video. Nah, that's not worth it; if they wanted make a painful video they would have used a trampoline like everyone else...
xblaine 17
You dumbass
seekingasaviour 9
I think everyone knows that friends are WAY overrated
xRezSynn 15
Never close your eyes when your guy friends tell you to...
superman3212 8
oldest trick in ra book...n u fell 4 it. -.-
Goblin182 27
Can you say assault? Have them arrested.
JesusOfNazareth 16
"I ain't got no motherfucking friends" -Tupac "**** the world -Tupac "You can never please society, have you ever seen an FML post that no one said YDI to? It's ridiculous. You could say, today I got yelled at for having the same name as George Bush and people will still say YDI" -Me