Today, I had to lie to my boyfriend and tell him that the red bumps around my nipples was heat rash, rather than admit it was actually razor burn. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my boyfriend complimented me on how he liked my freckles down below. I didn't have the heart to tell him that they were just razor rash. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me why I have "crotch acne". When I attempted to explain that I have razor bumps from shaving, he got mad and said I was lying and insecure about my obvious facial and bodily acne problem. FML
Today, I found out this girl I had sex with lied to me. They weren't razor burn bumps. And I now have them. FML
Today, I shaved my lady bits for the first time to surprise my husband, who I haven't seen in months due to deployment. I ended up with razor burn and my dim-witted husband believes I cheated on him and that it's an STD. Nothing will tell him otherwise. FML
Today, my boyfriend pretended to be reading braille while touching my chest acne. FML
Today, my son begged me to take him to the doctor for the weeping bloody rash on his penis so I had to take an unpaid day off for his appointment. The doctor laughed us out the door after it turned out to be a good old-fashioned friction burn. FML
Today, my boyfriend lied about having herpes, and used it as an excuse to dump me. FML
Today, I was going to bleach my bikini line, as I have not been able to shave there due to some ingrown hairs, and I also have to lifeguard every day. As it turns out, I'm allergic to the bleach. There is now an angry red, burning rash on my crotch that you can see around my swimsuit. FML
Today, me and my boyfriend were telling each other secrets, so I told him I shaved my upper lip. He said, "I know, it's prickly when we make out." FML
Today, I wore a bikini to the lake with my parents. I didn't know that my back was covered in bruises, and ended up having to awkwardly explain to my parents that I am not in an abusive relationship; the bruises came from the sex I had last night. FML
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Top comments
Major_Whupass 3
And instead of telling your boyfriend, you told the entire Internet!
Hockeyboy4280 18
That's the biggest myth ever. You only have so many follicles on your body. Sure, it may appear thick at first, but that's because the ends of the hairs are blunted. As the hair grows, it will split and damage which in turn will thin it out. As for darkness, shaving won't change melanin... Darkness is genetic.
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Comments (185)
iMarriedadouche 3
Pluck them next time OP
rinnai 6
OP you shouldn't have shaved your nipples. I did that too once and it just made the hair grow back thicker, darker and much longer. Now I have to keep plucking for life. Those that think that shaving doesn't make the hair grow back longer and thicker are wrong. It has happened to me every time.
Psycho_Babydoll 26
One should NEVER take a razor to their nipples. This FML could have been so much worse, consider yourself lucky OP!
AzWolf 5
Nothing wrong with hair there
jessicadavis374 6
You shave your nipples? Wow...
amerikaninfidel 2
We talking about boons in here?
kellyjo66 3
Wax maybe better?
twinkiefeets 17
Tweeze! Just tweeze!
kayaker83 4
Everyone knows to wax them geeze lol
bRower 3
What if you accidentally cut yourself while shaving? Ahhh I cringe just thinking about it. Sharp objects near nipples just doesn't sound like a good idea.