Today, I found out that my home-made pasta sauce had a weird taste to it because my basil patch in the backyard has become my dog's preferred spot to pee. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized that my dogs have been hosing my tomatoes with pee every time they go out. Not just the plants, the tomatoes I'd been eating all summer. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park. It had recently rained, and he started rolling in something unidentifiable. When I got home, I discovered it was a mixture of mud and who knows what else. Now my house smells like a swamp. FML
Today, my boyfriend spent forty minutes making pasta sauce when we had a perfectly good jar of pasta sauce in the pantry. FML
Today, I was enjoying my dinner by my patio window when I spotted a cat roaming through my backyard. As I observed it explore my yard, I also watched as it climbed onto, then took a piss on the freshly clean clothes I had left to dry. FML
Today, I helped myself to some homemade biscuits that had been left in the kitchen. I thought they looked a little odd, but they tasted pretty good. I found out later they were homemade dog treats. FML
Today, I made homemade pasta from scratch. I spent hours kneading the dough, rolling it out, and cutting it into perfect strips. When I went to cook it, I realized that I forgot to add salt to the dough. The pasta tasted like damp cardboard. FML
Today, I gave my puppy a treat for finally doing his business in the grass instead of on the patio. He later puked it up all over the patio. FML
Today, after letting the painters working on my house know that they're more than welcome to use my restroom, I walked outside only to find three of them pissing in my garden. One even aimed for my tomatoes. FML
Today, I stepped in dog shit, barefoot, in my own bathroom. The dog had been outside for two hours earlier, and I'd watched him take a dump. Apparently he was saving some for when he got back in the house. FML
Today, I cleaned up the dog poop from around the back yard. This is how I discovered that my dog's favorite snack appears to be used condoms. FML
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Top comments
seztacular 6
You didn't think to wash it first?
Pleonasm 36
Home Made Piss-ta Sauce.
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Comments (73)
AwkwardPartyBear 24
You can always build a little fence or gate around your patch. Also you should always wash it off. Otherwise you're going to be pissed.
drkrissy1331 12
Seems the dog wanted to help his momma with cooking and add his own lil spice!
Sandsh8rk 36
That must have 'pissed' you off.
13ky13 20
Well that's a shitty situat... Damn, wrong FML.
whY402Jay 12
It's good that you investigated and now know the problem.
Mackenzie99 6
Ew!!!! I'd be so mad!!!
CharresBarkrey 16
Why? The dog didn't do it on purpose.
The_Decider 8
Wash it?
Shelta957 13
Mmmm... Extra salt?
imsh0rts0watt 9
YDI.. Put a fence around any kind of garden if you own a dog!
asherm 15
I was thinking the same, put a fence around the stuff you don't want doggie waste products on, and help keep other critters out too.
perdix 31
I suggest you don't make gnocchi with the "potatoes" you harvest in your garden.
racheldeanne 7
Perhaps putting something around the garden to block the dog from reaching it? Not sure how you didn't think of that, OP.